Reviews

This movie made me want to hit myself in the face. My fiancée and I watched it together and though I was itching to turn it off, he chose to watch through to the end so that we could see if the protagonist died in a fiery plane crash, not that that would have been all that satisfying because it would have just been another stereotypical ending, though not as stereotypical as the one he chose. The movie is slow, boring, trite, and irritating as all-get-out. I don't know why everyone is comparing it to the Graduate except that it copies some of its scenes such as the escalator and the funeral. The best part of the movie, and one of the infinitesimally few funny parts, was his shirt blending into the wall, and that lasted all of a few seconds and was included in the commercial. People are making a big deal about Natalie Portman being charismatic in this movie--she isn't. Her character is one of the dumbest, least desirable and most obnoxious I've seen. Watching her was like listening to a tape of children's programming, without as much coherence or originality. I hated her character way more than Braff's but hated Braff for creating her in the first place. Basically, both I and my fiancée felt that this was an extremely highschoolesque production, created by an immature mind eager to show the world that he went to film school and remembers the common devices. If Zach Braff had not become popular through Scrubs, I doubt this movie would ever have been made, nor should it have been. I rented this with a coupon for a mere 99 cents, and I want my dollar and my two hours back.

Warning: 1 spoiler This movie was too long and made me sort of nauseous, but then I might have just been nauseous when I watched the movie. It's good enough that even though it dragged ON and ON and ON and was a bit graphic & depressing, I couldn't quite tear myself away. It's not good enough that I would waste 3 hours to see it again. It's really just too long. And, I would've liked to have seen that first guy get his dog back.

Saw this one sans-subtitles and maybe I missed something, but since when does graphic nudity and sex deserve critical acclaim? I certainly didn't notice anything else about the movie that made it memorable. Or maybe the movie was about more than just a horny lady gettin' it on threesome-style with two young'uns (pretty predictable if you ask me). I'm just glad they didn't decide to "shock" us some more and have them be blood-cousins. Incidentally, I don't think those guys came off as gay in the end there. I mean they were already used to being naked around each other & masturbating together, so a threesome seems like something they'd be pretty comfortable with. And they just needed a little kissin' while they were getting hand jobs, yo! That doesn't make them gay. Of course the threesome scene was cut way too short to know whether they actually had gay sex. Oh, and yes, by the way, I do speak Spanish; I don't only remember the sex because I couldn't understand what they were saying... although some of the slang threw me.

WARNING: POSSIBLE SPOILERS.

Not a good movie, but one that I would have watched anyway based on the first 2. Not as horrible as some people say, and if you think that the truffle scene was gross, just watch Van Wilder. Then again I wouldn't watch this again, nor would I really watch most comedies of this type twice (a lot of the humour evaporates after the first time). Though I eventually forgot all about the missing characters, I was kind of ticked that they didn't even mention Chris Klein & Mena Suvari's characters. After the movie was over I assumed that those guys had read the script and wanted nothing to do with AP3. Stiffler was ridiculously obnoxious right up until he "redeems himself". Why was everyone treating him with such hatred? I didn't understand why all of his supposed "friends" were so against him. Especially Michelle since she barely knew him. I would have felt sorry for him except he was being such a tool. Anyway, when all the other characters reacted like Stiffler was just some as*hole offensive jerk who should just leave because he was ruining the wedding, Stiffler came off, in effect, as unfunny, rude, and like he was ruining the wedding. Then out of nowhere he acquires a conscience and helps save the wedding? Oh, I see... growth. Yeah, that really goes with Stiffler's character. Anyway, as I said before, this movie is not that bad, but it is mediocre.

Overall I would give this a 5/10 and not watch it again.