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1/10
criShockingly bad in every respect
6 August 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Rarely have I seen a major show accomplish such a colossaly bad episode in every respect; atrocious writing, ludicrous over-acting and mornic directing. In a sense it is a true masterpiece, of the bad.

In the episode Ciri is lost in the desert, where she ceaselessly talks to herself , and later on to visions and a unicorn. The monologues and dialogues are utter rubbish, unnatural and over acted. It is cringe inducing. Only slightly better than the ridiculous dialogue, are the long stretches of boredom as Ciri walks in the desert for about 30 minutes of screen time with little happening.

Finally a completly moronic fight scene where she manages to kill an elephant sized monster by hanging on it's shell for a couple of seconds, which causes a huge chunk of shell to just tear off (what?), which she the uses to promply kill the monster. But the monster did manahe to severely injure her unicorn- so Ciri tends to it's severe injury by... placing a tiny piece of gauze on it. Problem solved.

Did no one in the production have eyes, ears or a brain? Astonishing.
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Bezos (2023)
6/10
Interesting story, horrible acting and directing
10 May 2023
This slow paced movie tells the story of how Jeff Bezos founded Amazon. While rhe story itself is increadibly flat, it did manage to keep me interested throughout the movie, knowing how big Bezos and Amazon will become.

The production value of the movie is very low, but that's not the biggest problem for a character driven drama. The real problem is horrible acting and directing. Some moments seem taken from a Hallmark movie from the 90s, and many other moments are robotic and staged.

Overall it's a pretty weak film, but can be useful to pass the time on a slow night in, when you might be too tired to watch anything actually engaging.
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7/10
Visually outstanding, but melodramatic script lacks subtlety
27 December 2022
As I watched the first season of LOTR: TROP I was amazed at the scope and beauty of the production. Incredible environments, vast landscapes and sweeping shots. Meticulously made sets, designs, props and costumes, and fantastic top-of-the-line special effects, CGI and animations. A real treat for the eyes.

The script on the other hand, is problematic. While the overarching main plot is reasonably good, the problem lies with the tempo and gravitas of the scenes that build the individual scenes. Specifically, every scene, and almost every single line ever spoken has the weight of life-and-death, good versus evil, fate of middle earth and all races in it.

And I do mean every scene.

A character cannot say hello without a dramatic pause, followed by a line such as: "in our language, we don't say hello. We say fluggely-mugguly, which means 'may the light of dawn show you the way of righteousness' " followed by meaningful looks, cinematic music and a sweeping shot.

Now repeat that same vibe a thousand times.

Every. Scene.

It gets tedious real fast.

I understand that LOTR is about epic struggles in it's core, but this heavy-handed treatment of these issues make it melodramatic and distance the viewer, rather than draw him in with the intricacies and nuances of small intimate moments- as they project into life's greatest questions.

Is it worth watching then?

It is, but as they say: "A bird will fly to the sun as the leaf falls to the earth. Just as good will triumph over evil, so will our toils forever stain the ground with the sweat of our forefathers" (meaningful look, sweeping shot, climactic cinematic music)
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Ms. Marvel (2022)
5/10
Show more concerned with political commentery then enetrtainment.
23 July 2022
Ms. Marvel is a show about a young Pakistani American girl who discovers she has obtained superpowers.

The show is cute but very bland, and both the plot and the action are not very exciting, especially when comparing to the brilliant writing some other MCU series have demonstrated.

Additionally, it seems the show is more concerned in shoving liberal/progressive indoctrination down the throats of viewers, rather then entertaining them. The result is both in alienating and counter productive to the immersiveness of the show, as I was more annoyed with the backdoor attempt to educate (or brainwash) me as the viewer then what actually happens in the show.

Disappointing, and at times, infuriating.
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The Simpsons: Poorhouse Rock (2022)
Season 33, Episode 22
2/10
Tiresome indoctrination is not entertainment
11 June 2022
I really love the simpsons, and they always had a left wing slant, but it was usually done with charm and humor, and in small doses, while occasionally allowing for conservative coubter arguments into the satire to make for a compelling and entertaining show.

This isn't the case for this episode, which descends into almost communist propaganda and brainwashing, allowing absolutely no counter arguments ("this isn't even contreversial, these are facts" sings Lisa, as she spews more contreversual and false opinions).

More than anyhting else, thus makes for poor entertainment and is more suitale to the USSR Pravda paper than for TV.
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The Wheel of Time (2021– )
6/10
Some good moments, many bad ones
24 March 2022
The hype for this show was quite big- finally a new big budget fantasy series!

And in some ways it holds up to the hype- sweeping landscapes, epic battles, beautiful set and costume design, and a grand story about good and evil.

But, there is just as much bad as there is good in the world and in the production, unfortunately.

Namely- an incredibly slow storyline, horrible writing and dialogues (and many of them), and even worse acting.

How frustrating...

Should you watch it then?

Well, if you can endure the bad moments, you can enjoy some very good ones. I waited until I had nothing better to watch before finishing the season. Just don't expect much.
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9/10
I really enjoyed it; it's everything that The Boys is not.
9 May 2021
Jupiter's Legacy tells the story of a band of aging superheroes and their next generation successors battling to keep their ideals in a changing world.

The theme; the boundaries of power and it's effect on moral corruption, is very similar to Amazon's "The Boys"- but is dealt with in a very different manner, which I found to be much more nuanced and therefore interesting.

I also enjoyed the characters, filmography, the way the story was told and revealed, and the cross editing between the current events and the origin story of the original superhero band.

I am surprised at the lackluster reviews I've seen here. For me, this was one of the most enjoyable series of the year, and I wholeheartedly recommend it.
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6/10
Mediocre and unmemorable high paced action
31 December 2019
The latest installment in the Star Wars saga has big shoes to fill, and maybe this responsibility is what ultimately made it so bland. The script which was ultimately so unoriginal, that lacked courage and artistic risks, and instead replaced them with incredibly complicated but meaningless story lines (bring along a genealogy expert to this film if you ever hope to make sense of the relations between all the characters), and with high paced endless action sequences more reminiscent of a Fast and Furious movie.

The characters, which in previous movies had individualism, are now completely nondescript, and physical appreaence aside, would be hard to tell apart or remember.

The film is also about an hour too long, making the action tedious rather than exciting just because of sheer screen time.

The film does deliver technically, and action sequences and effects are all done to the highest standard, with a couple of scenes standing out, though again, with no artistic ingenuity or ground breaking ideas, it's just more of the same (but done well).

So should you see it? I would recommend it if you manage expectations. This is a generic big budget franchise action movie. It contains many of the beloved themes and settings from a world you might love. It treats them well enough. It just doesn't deliver anything new or exciting or insightful, unlike the original trilogy. Knowing this, you can enjoy the movie for what it is: unmemorable action.
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Daybreak (I) (2019)
6/10
Tries too hard to be cool
27 October 2019
There are few things which are as uncool as trying too hard to be cool. This is the way this show felt to me. Some nice ideas and a bit of daring and style, are quickly driven off rails by trying too hard to be cool, rather then trying to be good. Makes for a "meh minus" watching experience, and often reminded me of a children's or adolescent action drama with lame action and lamer jokes... it can pass the time, and has it's moments, but that's about it.
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UglyDolls (2019)
5/10
Lackluster in every possible aspect
19 July 2019
UglyDolls is the story of a bunch of defective ("ugly") dolls who were rejected from the assembly line, but are now trying to find a way through QA (quality assurance) and out to the world. On their journey they need to confront bigotry and obstacles from the perfect dolls.

The story itself is ok, and could make for a good movie, but unfortunately the movie is amazingly lackluster in every sense of the word and in every field: the songs are mostly dull and unmemorable (though some are better then others). Humor is scant to non-existant, many of the characters are flat and non-descript, and the environment (apart from UglyVille) is non existent, meaning most of the time the characters are acting on flat solid color backgrounds or in minimal environments with little detail. For me, this lack of care (or budget) for visuals is what hurt this movie the most, making the world unappealing and dull.

This is not a horrible movie, plot holds up, acting is ok, and while most elements are mediocre or sub-par, non are outright bad.

That being said, I really wouldn't recommend the movie very much unless you have nothing else to watch, and don't come with high expectations,
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Dark Matter (2015–2017)
8/10
Suprisingly good in every aspect
20 June 2019
I didn't expect much from this series simply because i never heard of it, but I'm halfway through season 2 now, and I am pleasently surprised. Pretty good script, dialogue, and acting, coupled with some excellent plot twists and very impressive martial arts skills from the actors (i am usually quite nit picky on the subject), all come together to make this little show extremely enjoyable. Worth your time, would recommend.
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Revisions (2019)
5/10
Decent storyline, horrible, tiring, melodramatic dialogue
5 June 2019
While the story is decent, and the animation good, the characters and dialogue are simply atrocious. Constant over-the-top melodrama from the main character that's always screaming and throwing a hissy fit make the show extremely tiring to watch. Can be enjoyed in small doses.
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First Man (2018)
5/10
Long, quiet and solemn, this film tries to look inwards, only to find dullness
16 December 2018
First man is the story of Neil Armstrong and the events leading up to the moon landing. Niel is portrayed as a rather silent type, and whole swathes of the film are devoid of dialogue or even any real actions, in an attempt to portray solemnity and introspection. These long arduous swathes of quiet life are routinely interrupted by realities of Neil's position in the forefront of the space race, operating in a dangerous, high octane and pioneering world of space exploration. The juxtaposing effect of switching between dull solemn slow moments in life and the high risk extreme moments of the space program is a nice idea, but it's a trick that runs out of steam the first time it is used, and certainly doesn't hold up for an entire movie where it is used again and again. What you're left with is an incredibly long movie, with huge swathes of boredom and inactivity. The dialogue is almost non existent, and most of the characters flat and devoid of interest, most of all- the character of Neil Armstrong which is portrayed as a joyless dull man. Maybe if this movie was a full hour shorter it could had been good. The current edit, for me, was agonizingly dull.

If the subject matter interests you enough, or if you're into slow brooding introspective movies- as long as you know what you're getting you self into, you could give this movie a go. Alternatively, if you're having trouble sleeping- here is your chance at a good nights sleep.
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5/10
Turned a riveting true story into mediocre drama
7 October 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Opertaion Finale tells the true story of the capture of one of the holocaust's architects in a daring operation carried out in the 60's by Israel's Mossad.

I did enjoy watching Operation Finale, but as I watched it, more and more questions about the conduct of the operation came into mind, and by the time I was done watching, I felt that there's no way that this is an accurate depiction of the events. It bothered me a little, so I checked online to read the true version of events, and boy- was reality more exciting and riveting then the story told on the screen! Why rewrite exciting events and replace them with dull nonsensical plot devices? I don't know, but it does hurt the film.

The real drama concerning the Operation should have come before the apprehension of Eichman. For a struggling 12 year-old nation like Israel, to mount such a daring and remote operation on the other end of the earth was no small feat.

Instead, the drama focuses on what happens in the window between Eichman's capture and before he is transferred to Israel for trial. The biggest problem here is how silly (and utterly untrue) the reason driving this whole drama: The agents have to get Eichman to sign a document giving his consent to be tried in in Israel, or the airline company won't allow him on board the plane!

That's right! They flew on a covert mission across the globe, forged identities and passports, kidnapped a Nazi from his home to face justice for one of mankind's greatest atrocities ever committed- but now they must face the biggest obstacle of all: bureaucracy!

Couldn't they just forge his signature? The movie gives an incredibly silly answer here as well: "They don't know what it looks like!" (but the airline company does)?

And so, for half the movie, a battle of wits ensues around a silly event that never happened.

In reality, the agents hid in the safehouse because they where bound to the plane's original schedule, and had to endure Eichman for days- which proved to be hard and unsettling. He was so forthcoming with his monstrous crimes and actions that he willingly signed the document- which was of no real consequence (certainly not to the airline company).

There are many other details that where altered for the movie, and it's a real shame. The true story was far superior and more exciting.

In the end i wonder if this movie does a disservice to the true, amazing, story.
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Lost in Space (2018–2021)
6/10
But why??
17 April 2018
Did you ever see a seemingly good show and then start asking yourself "Wait, why don't they just..." or "What? Why did they do that"? Well if not- search no further! this show will give you the chance to ask these questions dozens and dozens of times!

A good looking production and an interesting subject do start this show on a great path, but when characters start making the silliest mistakes that could *easily* be avoided- over and over and over again, or keep ignoring the most significant issues which can be resolved in seconds- this show starts to really annoy the viewer and his intelligence.

These glaring and repetitive script issues really mar what could had been a great show, but present as they are, they make it hard to suspend the disbelief and enjoy the show rather then being annoyed by it.
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The Punisher (2017–2019)
6/10
I'm in the middle of ep.04, and I'm oh so bored
29 November 2017
Episode 1 started excellent, though not having watched Daredevil I was a little confused as to the back story. Never mind- I Love the dark complicated Punisher character, the acting and cinematography were fantastic- and the action was brilliant.

Fast forward to episode 4 and it's like nothing interesting has happened since. The plot trudges on and on ever so slowly and the whole show has become a second-rate law drama. endless boring dialogues, the plot has barely progressed, and the secondary characters are oh so boring. Even the superb action sequences from previous episodes are practically gone, with a sub-par car chase sequence (which is one of the worst car chase edits I've seen in recent memory) constituting the action for this particular episode. I really hope this picks up soon, because the promise was so good. But I don't know if I will make it, since here I am, writing a review in the middle of an episode in an attempt to share and alleviate the boredom caused by it...

If you like crime thrillers or slow paced drama, then The Punisher might be for you. If you where looking for a dynamic fast paced high octane superhero show- then do (by all means) watch the first episode, and nothing more.
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Storks (2016)
9/10
Surprisingly great and extremely funny
1 January 2017
I have to admit, the subject material for the movie didn't entice me to watch it. But once I did get around to seeing it, I thoroughly enjoyed the experience!

Though I found the two leading characters (Junior and Tulip) to be the most bland characters in the whole movie, this was easily mediated with by the many, many, redeeming qualities of the movie. From the colourful, original and hilarious supporting characters, to the lovely animation and design, through a fast paced, original, and twist filled script and the dynamic editing and flow of the movie. More then anything else, though, what I found most enjoyable about storks was how downright funny the movie was. Jam-packed with jokes and funny moments, the laughs-per-minute count was off the chart, with many memorable and hilarious moments.

The movie was a joy to watch and to laugh to, and I recommend it for any constellation- be it to watch on your own, with friends, or the whole family.
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The Bronze (2015)
6/10
Mediocrity at it mediocritiest
31 December 2016
The story of a has-been crass and spoiled Olympic bronze medal gymnastic reluctantly turned coach, which along the way finds her way again.

The plot is robust enough, though the idea that an Olympic medalist would become so spoiled and undisciplined seems a little weird to me. A nice cast, unusual subject matter and interesting characters all could have made for a good comedy. Unfortunately- this movie lacks the most important trait a comedy should have; it isn't funny. There are very little to no jokes, and the crass foul manners of the lead role become uninteresting very fast.

Without being funny, the movie is left to it's bare devices. Fortunately most of the other aspects of the movie are not that bad- the acting is decent, the plot holds, the script is event filled and interesting enough to hold the viewers attention for the duration of the film, cinematography is good, and even in a specific moment (final exercise)- inspired. It's just such a shame the movie isn't funny... because all of the other elements combined only make for a very mediocre film, which I expect to completely forget by next week.
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Ben-Hur (2016)
3/10
Subtle as a brick, with as much emotion. Also: Jesus ruined the film.
29 November 2016
Having not seen the 1959 version of this movie, I can objectively tell you- this film was bad regardless of any comparison you would make.

The story focuses on Judah Ben-Hur and his raised-in-the-same-house friend/brother/nemesis Messala.

As the movie progresses, it becomes more and more lackluster with horrible lines, and the acting and shooting to go with them. But the real nail in the coffin (or cross) is the Character of Jesus, who hijacks this film and takes it even farther away from the realms of passion and emotion, and into the realms of cheesiness and bad moments.

Jesus' character does not exude any grandeur or divinity, and instead of making this film a complex study of human emotion and maybe even of the nature of godliness, makes it a study in the lack of subtleness and any depth.

The film does contain a couple of good action scenes, in particular the chariot race- but the last 30 minutes or so of the movie that follow are some of the worst I have ever seen- so it just isn't worth it.
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The 100 (2014–2020)
9/10
I'm really enjoying the show!
4 February 2016
I'll start with the bad: Sci Fi shows have a couple of big problems to overcome, among which is that they have to be believable and the actions the characters make have to be compelling. As a viewer you don't want to continually ask "why didn't they just do that instead"? And if there's one thing that's still problematic with The 100, is that they don't always overcome this issue. But apart from that, this is a really good show, with plenty of wonderful, unexpected and intelligent twists and turns, a very engaging story, lots of interesting and (mostly) believable and complex characters, and tons of exciting new realms to discover and explore. I really didn't expect to like it as much as I am! But by now, I am in the middle of season 3 and can't wait for the next episode to come. Season 2 was particularly good! Highly recommended.
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The Magicians (2015–2020)
3/10
Annoying, neurotic, and utterly charmless.
4 February 2016
This show isn't about magic. This show is about very annoying, neurotic people in a soap-opera style setting. 3 Episodes in and I don't think that there's one character I like (definitely not the amazingly annoying anxious emo lead. Think Woody Allen without any humour or charm), nor a character relationship I believe.

There really is very little magic or spells in the show, so all you are left with are the neurotic, peppy, ridiculous, New-York-upper-class characters (who look more like parodies than actual characters), more befitting a particularly bad episode of Gossip Girl.

What really amazes (and saddens) me is that they managed to create a "magical world" devoid of any charm. I really wanted this series to be good, but the magic simply isn't happening, and this is not a world I want to step into, and not one I want to have in my life for 45 minutes a week. Expelliarmus.
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7/10
I really enjoyed it!
1 December 2015
Considering the score this movie got on IMDb, I was expecting it to be horrible, yet to my surprise, found myself totally engaged throughout the movie and thoroughly enjoying it! I was never a fan of the fantastic four, as I found them too wholesome and boring- but in this movie a dark undertone makes for a more interesting and less obvious plot line.

There are several elements missing from the film- it lacks both humour and sex appeal, and it could really (really) have used another action scene and a bigger climax.

That being said, I did like that it was a 90 minute film- which used to be the normal movie length- and allows you to keep concentrated and comfortable rather then those unbelievably long movies they insist in making nowadays though everybody always says how they hate it. And during the 90 minutes I found myself enjoying every second of the film. I do wish they had a better climax though, as you do feel slightly empty once the movie ends- but still, I would recommend it for a fun evening.
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Aloha (I) (2015)
3/10
So bad it will make you cringe with discomfort
29 September 2015
Rarely have I seen such a bad film from a major studio release and with A or B list stars in it, but this truly is one of the worst movies I've seen recently. I would try to sum up the plot, but it's meaningless, as this movie is not a whole,flowing story, but rather a checklist of markers through which the scenes pass and tick the box, and hurry on to the next marker on the list.

By eliminating any character and story growth and simply jumping to the bottom line in every scene, some scenes are just so awkward and... just bad, they will make you cringe with discomfort, not only because they're so lame in themselves, but because they're so obvious and scripted that it's pathetic.

I really like light Rom-Com's, and I enjoy a film that doesn't take itself too seriously- but this one is so bad it actually made me sad.
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Da Vinci's Demons (2013–2015)
7/10
Strats horribly, but progresses to be an exciting interesting show!
9 November 2014
What started out as a ludicrous show, progressed over time to become quite intelligent and interesting.

As I sat through the first few episodes of the show, I had a hard time suspending my disbelief. In the show, Leonardo Da Vinci is not only the famous Renaissance man of art and engineering, but also a kind of superhero, handsome Casanova, gifted swordsman and athlete extraordinaire. Meaning not only does he solve problems with his incredible mind (which he uses like a super hero uses his super-sense), but by becoming this mcgaiver/batman/James bond. Not only this, but during his adventures he encounters every possible fable and scientific discovery from any and all ages- form discovering the Americas, to fighting Dracula. That is Leonardo!

But beyond these ludicrous adventures, the second half of the first season, and the second season after that actually have a very good script including plot twists, surprises, intrigues and good storytelling. As well as good acting, camera work, production, editing and some really good fight scenes! So what started out as total garbage has now become a very exciting interesting series, which I do recommend watching. Just bare through the nonsense of some of the earlier episodes.
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Dig! (2004)
5/10
What a mess!
9 April 2011
I was told great things about this documentary, but was greatly disappointed,mostly because of it's editing that was such a mess that it was simply hard to follow.

The story supposedly follows the stories of two rock bands: The Brian Jonestown Massacre and The Dandy Warhols, but in reality focuses on the megalomaniac and petty ramblings of The Brian Jonestown Massacre founder Anton, which spews dime-philosophies about not wanting to sell out, while at the same time trying to get signed by a big label. Pathetic.

None of this is the film's problem though. As a matter of fact, it could have made for very interesting viewing. But the editing is a coarse splicing of random sentences and petty endless rants. These cuts are spliced across throughout locations, characters and periods. Making it a hodge-podge mess of syncs that make the story hard to follow and relate to. The sound and camera work are all atrocious. Not necessarily a problem in an authentic documentary, but combined with the frantic editing it makes for tiresome viewing. Combine that with the fact that this is a documentary about music bands but doesn't allow you to really hear their music properly (it's ever present but always from a the messy live camera mic feed, and always gets cut within seconds for the random rants).

Towards the end of the film, the editing style changes and becomes more coherent, follows syncs and events for longer and just generally makes more sense, which is the only reason I gave this film a score of 5 and not 2 (it still gets a couple of points for a generally good idea and some interesting moments).

all in all I would say that this looks like a promising rough cut that could have made a great film if it would have been edited down and rearranged.

Hope you find my review useful.
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