I generally like or at least tolerate Euro porn, with its bevy of anal-centric perfect-looking women, interchangeable studs and production values so lavish you can hum them, but Château from the Private label is deadly dull. I have no wish to suffer through any of the sequels in this series.
What we have here is a would-be XXX spin on those nighttime soaps of yore, namely DYNASTY. But interesting casts and compelling who's doing what to whom made those watchable.
There are vast gobs of plot here, but all of it pointless and almost intentionally dumb. Story revolves around "The Legend of the Golden Goat" (I'm not kidding), and has a flashback set in 1100 A.D. with Christians battling Muslims. There's pointless action in 1807 too, leading up to present-day vast vineyard and a château, with power struggles over ownership plus dynastic squabbles about arranged marriages and inheritance.
Silvia Saint, the only name talent, pops up for a lesbian scene with Cristina Bella (playing a photographer). McKenzie Lee, who I had just seen in a Red Ezra U.S. porn tribute to her, is the British-accented heroine but at no time are we made to feel anything for these paper mache characters trotted out one by one.
Filmmaker Conrad Son (using video unfortunately, even though it's obvious he had a big budget to work with) sounds like he should have gone to hotel management school instead of film school, as he doesn't have a clue regarding dramaturgy. The Euro fetishes of sex are doled out at regular intervals but simply clash with the self-important, turgid acting and exposition sequences. In a world dominated by 1-day wonders it's sad to see such resources wasted on drivel like this. GODFATHER III, anyone?
What we have here is a would-be XXX spin on those nighttime soaps of yore, namely DYNASTY. But interesting casts and compelling who's doing what to whom made those watchable.
There are vast gobs of plot here, but all of it pointless and almost intentionally dumb. Story revolves around "The Legend of the Golden Goat" (I'm not kidding), and has a flashback set in 1100 A.D. with Christians battling Muslims. There's pointless action in 1807 too, leading up to present-day vast vineyard and a château, with power struggles over ownership plus dynastic squabbles about arranged marriages and inheritance.
Silvia Saint, the only name talent, pops up for a lesbian scene with Cristina Bella (playing a photographer). McKenzie Lee, who I had just seen in a Red Ezra U.S. porn tribute to her, is the British-accented heroine but at no time are we made to feel anything for these paper mache characters trotted out one by one.
Filmmaker Conrad Son (using video unfortunately, even though it's obvious he had a big budget to work with) sounds like he should have gone to hotel management school instead of film school, as he doesn't have a clue regarding dramaturgy. The Euro fetishes of sex are doled out at regular intervals but simply clash with the self-important, turgid acting and exposition sequences. In a world dominated by 1-day wonders it's sad to see such resources wasted on drivel like this. GODFATHER III, anyone?