I only bought this because of Corman and I'll admit I got my $1 worth out of this flick. That aside, it's a pretty lame film. The whole crime family drama shtick never works for me overall, so that's a setback right there and I could have cared less about any of the characters, as there is nothing about them that even remotely touches on the realities of organized crime, strip clubs, law enforcement, or prostitution. There's some nice nudity thrown into the mix, some OK fight scenes, and the rest of the time you are watching humorless, lame Hollywood BS that seems to drag out much longer than it should. An adequate time-waster but probably not a film you'll want to see twice. And who gets romantic and decides to have sex after having two of their fingers cut off? That scene was beyond stupid and the rest of the film wasn't much better.
5 Reviews
Some stylish action with typical Corman camp
templegod22 April 2002
It is important to note that this is a very unusual film. Usually Corman films have action sequences that are a bit campy. Hard as nails plays the fight scenes serious. Actress/Stunt artist Chona Jason is a wicked bad girl not to be messed with, and excellent with a sword. The movie has some parts which are way too campy and silly not keeping with the fighting. This detracts from the fact that a real martial artist like Chona is playing her part serious, and trying to do her best in the role. What does this all mean? Watch it with a grain of salt, the low budget didn't allow for good death scenes, but they are headed in the right direction in action sequences. Hopefully a trend to have women like Chona more involved in real fight sequences will continue especially in light of Resident Evil. This movie rates a 6 out of 10.
Hard as Nails? More like Dumb as Dirt.
tarbosh2200016 November 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Centered primarily around an L. A. strip club, Hard as Nails tells the tale of Vlad (Craig), a morbidly obese Russian gangster, who is involved in some sort of turf war with a Japanese gang. While Takura (Westmore) is attempting to assert himself as a new gang leader, young lovers Alexi (Scotti) and Deb (McComas) are caught in the middle. Adding to this brew is plainclothes cop Tony (Timmons) and his relationship to a prostitute named Margo (Farentino). Of course, a pair of ruthless assassins named Tic and Tac (Jason and Pollino, respectively) are beating up and/or slaughtering people left and right. What the heck is going on - and who amongst this bunch is truly HARD AS NAILS?
Copies of Hard as Nails should come with a warning: "You are now about to enter a brain cell-free zone". Or something to that effect. Somehow managing to be both low rent and bargain basement, it's rather obvious that this Corman production did not spend a single penny it did not need to. Not that that's a problem in its own right, but the junky factor mixed with the stupid factor adds up to an overwhelmingly dumb experience you'll feel stupider for having watched. However, it's only 75 minutes. But it does feel longer.
Director Brian Katkin, who did Enemy Action (1999) for Corman, attempted to do John Woo with zero budget. The Martial Artists Tic and Tac, featured on the front of the VHS box, are meant to recall The Matrix with their sunglasses and trenchcoats, but you could probably call that misleading. We give credit to the Martial Artists here, who probably worked hard to make the fight scenes what they were, under the trying circumstances. The film is more in line with other Corman action/stripping movies such as Bloodfist 2050 (2005), Mortal Challenge (1997), and Future Kick (1991), among others. It's also like an even cheaper version of King of Fighters (2010) (complete with a similar Himbo), or Equal Impact (1995), but without the majesty of Joe and Jay Gates. Now that's a problem.
It seems like all the nudity and stripping scenes were employed to distract viewers in an attempt to paper over all the many, many flaws. While we love Lorissa McComas, and she tries gamely in the face of all this muck, even she can't save it. As in a lot of DTV films of this type, many actors are involved that look like other people. Someone looks like Mario Lopez here, someone resembles Daniel Bernhardt there, and there may be a Michael J. Pollard type hanging around. In a better film, John Rhys-Davies would have played Vlad. But, then again, if it was a better movie, it wouldn't be Hard as Nails.
See, the thing is that we as viewers can't just settle for any old thing. Just putting a movie out there to put it out there, under the bare minimum of conditions, usually doesn't yield the best results. We should demand more than this. Seeing as how Hard as Nails opens with someone being punched repeatedly in the face, we can't help but see that as a metaphor for what you'll experience if you watch it.
Hard as Nails? More like Dumb as Dirt.
Copies of Hard as Nails should come with a warning: "You are now about to enter a brain cell-free zone". Or something to that effect. Somehow managing to be both low rent and bargain basement, it's rather obvious that this Corman production did not spend a single penny it did not need to. Not that that's a problem in its own right, but the junky factor mixed with the stupid factor adds up to an overwhelmingly dumb experience you'll feel stupider for having watched. However, it's only 75 minutes. But it does feel longer.
Director Brian Katkin, who did Enemy Action (1999) for Corman, attempted to do John Woo with zero budget. The Martial Artists Tic and Tac, featured on the front of the VHS box, are meant to recall The Matrix with their sunglasses and trenchcoats, but you could probably call that misleading. We give credit to the Martial Artists here, who probably worked hard to make the fight scenes what they were, under the trying circumstances. The film is more in line with other Corman action/stripping movies such as Bloodfist 2050 (2005), Mortal Challenge (1997), and Future Kick (1991), among others. It's also like an even cheaper version of King of Fighters (2010) (complete with a similar Himbo), or Equal Impact (1995), but without the majesty of Joe and Jay Gates. Now that's a problem.
It seems like all the nudity and stripping scenes were employed to distract viewers in an attempt to paper over all the many, many flaws. While we love Lorissa McComas, and she tries gamely in the face of all this muck, even she can't save it. As in a lot of DTV films of this type, many actors are involved that look like other people. Someone looks like Mario Lopez here, someone resembles Daniel Bernhardt there, and there may be a Michael J. Pollard type hanging around. In a better film, John Rhys-Davies would have played Vlad. But, then again, if it was a better movie, it wouldn't be Hard as Nails.
See, the thing is that we as viewers can't just settle for any old thing. Just putting a movie out there to put it out there, under the bare minimum of conditions, usually doesn't yield the best results. We should demand more than this. Seeing as how Hard as Nails opens with someone being punched repeatedly in the face, we can't help but see that as a metaphor for what you'll experience if you watch it.
Hard as Nails? More like Dumb as Dirt.
stylish, funny, dramatic
kappa-317 August 2001
While being a true Corman flick, with his share of breasts, cliche' dialogue, super-hero cops and stereotyped foreign villains, the film still manages very strong moments and scenes of genuine emotional impact. These moments of "true" human drama are intermixed with over-the-top, sword-swinging action and adrenaline-charged martial arts sequences. The odd coexistence of typical elements of Corman's B-movies with straight in-your-face drama and subtle irony is pulled together by a stylish cinematography that, at times, seems to support the full dramatic element of the film while, often, shifts towards a cartoonish and surreal style that seems to actually negate the seriousness of the events. The film's tone, therefore, constantly shifts from truly dramatic to moments where things are purposely exaggerated and off-the wall, seemingly mocking the "noir" genre. One moment you are emotionally involved in the characters' pain, then the next scene mocks the viewer saying "it's all a big joke!". It is this clever, constant stylistic shift, combined with break-neck action, that make this film worth watching.
tits and guns
Barry_Norman28 November 2003
I think the only way to describe this film is 'tits and guns'.
Most of the film revolves around a strip club with the the larger-than-life Russian owner trying to put a deal together with an unstable half-japanese American lad to buy a mass of guns. The young lad gets frisky with a delicious Lorissa McComas pole dancer and all hell breaks loose. Coupled with the fact an undercover cop is lurking about and you have a recipe for one violent action scene after another.
Speaking of the fight scenes, these look lame compared with say a Jet Li/Jackie Chan movie. The long trench coat smacks of trying to be a Matrix copy but falling well, well short.
All in all, pretty average action thriller. 5/10
Most of the film revolves around a strip club with the the larger-than-life Russian owner trying to put a deal together with an unstable half-japanese American lad to buy a mass of guns. The young lad gets frisky with a delicious Lorissa McComas pole dancer and all hell breaks loose. Coupled with the fact an undercover cop is lurking about and you have a recipe for one violent action scene after another.
Speaking of the fight scenes, these look lame compared with say a Jet Li/Jackie Chan movie. The long trench coat smacks of trying to be a Matrix copy but falling well, well short.
All in all, pretty average action thriller. 5/10
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