Heavens Above! (1963)

Cecil Parker: Archdeacon Aspinall

Quotes 

• The Reverend John Smallwood : It isn't the paying, it's the caring. That's what counts with God.

  Archdeacon Aspinall : I don't think there's any need to keep bringing God into this, Smallwood.

  The Reverend John Smallwood : Well, it's difficult to keep him out, especially when you're working for him like we are.

• Archdeacon Aspinall : I don't think there's any need to keep bringing God into this.

• Lady Despard : How is he doctrinally?

  Archdeacon Aspinall : Oh, middle of the road. Not too high, not too low.

  Lady Despard : Good! Sir George had such a horror of Roman practices.

• Lady Despard : Does he have any money of his own?

  Archdeacon Aspinall : Oh, yes.

  Lady Despard : Good. A poor parson's such an embarrassment.

• Lady Despard : Does he drink?

  Archdeacon Aspinall : An occasional glass of wine.

  Lady Despard : Well, that will be a welcomed change, after the last one.

  Archdeacon Aspinall : I can assure you, Lady Despard, Beecham was a teetotaler before he came to Orbiston Parva.

  [the previous vicar] 

• Miss Palmer : Yes sir, archdeacon. Have a good time.

  Archdeacon Aspinall : It's rest I'm going for, Miss Palmer - rest. There's no good time for us.

• Archdeacon Aspinall : [Dictating a letter]  Unhappily, I cannot be present at your institution and induction. I've been long overdoing it lately. My dear friend, Lord Butley, has kindly invited me to join his yacht at Monte Carlo for a short cruise. But I will certainly visit you soon after my return.

• Archdeacon Aspinall : As I explained to the bishop, his conduct certainly reveals some disquieting symptoms. An almost childlike simple-mindedness, for example. Uh, coupled with the most unhealthy exhibitionism.

  Rockeby : The Church has always had its quota of the psychologically abnormal. But... .in the past your chaps have made 'em saints. Heh, heh, heh, heh!

• Archdeacon Aspinall : And lying the on the deck of Lord Butley's yacht, with the sun pouring down on my naked body, I suddenly realized how much easier it is for he rich to lead that truly simple life our Lord advocated.

• The Reverend John Smallwood : It's not those people I'm worried about. I'm worried about you.

  Lady Despard : Me?

  The Reverend John Smallwood : Yes. You see, from a Christian point of view, you're in a bit of a fix, aren't you? I mean, we've all got a few weights to do on the way to heaven. But with the weight you're carrying, well, um, I'm worried whether you'll be there at the finish.

  Lady Despard : What exactly do you mean - the weight I'm carrying?

  The Reverend John Smallwood : Well, I was thinking of that bit about the rich and the eye of the needle.

  Archdeacon Aspinall : Now, come, come, Smallwood. Nowadays that passage is given a very different interpretation.

  The Reverend John Smallwood : Yes, I dare say.

  Lady Despard : Are you really telling me that because I'm rich, I might...

  [the scene switches to the kitchen where the Smith adults are arguing] 

  Winnie Smith : ...go to hell.