Writer/director Adam Marcus probably doesn't realize half how accurate the title of his film, in fact, really is! In case you ever participated in a Secret Santa routine, in your family or among colleagues/friends, you just know that you never get what you really want, and that basically all presents are worthless. All I wanted for Christmas, was a fun and reasonably qualitative holiday-horror, but what I got was this lousy "Secret Santa".
Moreover, this is the worst type of bad movie. The type that thinks of itself as clever, tongue-in-cheek, and original. Hate to break it to you, Mr. Marcus, but your film isn't any of the above. It's a frustrating mix between vulgar humor and sickening gore, with exclusively loathsome characters. A rich and eccentric family, of which the father is a pharmaceutical tycoon, gathers at their cabin in a fancy skiing resort. It's the kind of family where everybody hates each other so badly, that it already is highly implausible they're celebrating Christmas together. Someone in the group spiced up the punch with a powerful truth-serum, which leads to even bigger arguments than usual. The serum apparently also has a bizarre side-effect, though, as they gradually also turn into mad-raving and drooling maniacs.
The gore is mean-spirited, but very poorly handled and not shocking at all, with a lot of CGI-stuff and hectic camerawork. The humor is frustrating because Adam Marcus makes use of "easy" stereotypes, like a boy who stutters, a pervert uncle, an uptight aunt, a Swedish girl, etc. The performances of the ensemble cast are lousy, but what do you expect with such a mediocre director in charge? Since it's Christmas, I'm generously giving two extra points, though. One for the opening credits in which the letters of the cast members' names turn into horror-terms, and one for the following quote that made me chuckle: "Your parents named you Penny because that's what they think you are worth!".
Moreover, this is the worst type of bad movie. The type that thinks of itself as clever, tongue-in-cheek, and original. Hate to break it to you, Mr. Marcus, but your film isn't any of the above. It's a frustrating mix between vulgar humor and sickening gore, with exclusively loathsome characters. A rich and eccentric family, of which the father is a pharmaceutical tycoon, gathers at their cabin in a fancy skiing resort. It's the kind of family where everybody hates each other so badly, that it already is highly implausible they're celebrating Christmas together. Someone in the group spiced up the punch with a powerful truth-serum, which leads to even bigger arguments than usual. The serum apparently also has a bizarre side-effect, though, as they gradually also turn into mad-raving and drooling maniacs.
The gore is mean-spirited, but very poorly handled and not shocking at all, with a lot of CGI-stuff and hectic camerawork. The humor is frustrating because Adam Marcus makes use of "easy" stereotypes, like a boy who stutters, a pervert uncle, an uptight aunt, a Swedish girl, etc. The performances of the ensemble cast are lousy, but what do you expect with such a mediocre director in charge? Since it's Christmas, I'm generously giving two extra points, though. One for the opening credits in which the letters of the cast members' names turn into horror-terms, and one for the following quote that made me chuckle: "Your parents named you Penny because that's what they think you are worth!".