If you think of this, this is like if Mrs Doubtfire and Home Alone had a baby where the kids hated the nanny and wanted to kill her. It's too goofy and silly to be a horror movie with just about the same amount of awful casting and poorly written script. However there is more potential to this than some movies the Hulkster has been in.
The introduction is so poorly edited when Hulk Hogan is getting beaten up by mostly jobbers which if you don't know wrestling lingo are wrestlers who their job is to make others look good. What kills me is he's in the ring with his silly fishing attire on. The movie is off to such a bad start because why can't it be that some of it impacts the story where there's some redemption. Then again this is a kids movie. Who cares. Of course Mr. Jefferson I mean Bert wants Hulk Hogan to be a body guard. Hulk doesn't at first and feels like he owes Bert.
Everyone in the fathers office has a bad accent. As if they are all trying to talk like Harley Quinn the one all those 14 year old girls romanticize about. I'm sure if Harley was there to see the hulkster beat all the security guards up to a really poorly choreographed pulp she would get flash backs of her and Mr. J. Alright enough Batman references. Seriously for a second I thought Ron Jeremy was one of the security guards. The one who got his head put through a wall. I love how the guy who hires him sees Hulk beat all these people up and goes he's hired! Then the second in command keeps saying oh no no.. don't hire him multiple times.
The psychotic" criminal genius" named. Tommy Thanatos which Thanatos is.the Greek god of death is so horrible of an actor. Seriously the Actor" should have stuck to singing in the New York Dolls. Maybe he hit his head for real. His first dastardly deed to "convince" the father in the movie to give him this chip called the "peace maker" is by putting a tiny bomb in his desk. He is given 24 hours to surrender the chip. The chip from my brief bit of attention to the beginning of the movie is that it will stop any missile. Wow.. riveting! Because of this Hulk Hogan is instead ordered to watch after his kids and grr.. he hates kids. The kids make such a great introduction. Their nanny runs out with her head on fire. Seriously, don't they put kids in juvie for stuff like that? At this point I realized how short and dirty the dad looked. Seriously you're going to be in a multi million dollar budged movie. He didn't have a haircut or anything. Was this some rich guys passion project to fund this nonsense.
What kills me is if the cook is so tough why doesn't she look after all the kids. They would be terrified of her with her infinite amounts of sass where she gives no one respect. She seems like one of those "woke" people who think everything is racist when she doesn't get her way.
What the heck is the father holding, it's like a really colorful calculator that prints faxes portability. He has the money for that but not a comb, hair spray, gel or a barber. The mom seemed to have kept them together. The father is that always busy cliche and only this steroid monster who constantly cheated on his wife and could fill that swimming pool with the alcohol or drugs he's ingested is giving advice?
The bad guy in this movie Tommy Thanatos is so over the top. I almost like how silly he is. He is like if Raul Julia in Street Fighter the movie didn't know when to calm down. The actor is so ugly and really only got the role for his voice. He has this metal bowl on his head. I guess he had his work done in some third world country for his injury I wonder if he had to turn to a life of crime to pay those crippling medical bills in America. Oh a splinter in your foot that'll be $999,999. Back to the movie How he got injured was he went head first off a building and into an empty pool when Hulk Hogan tossed him off as there was a gun involved and his ugly afro looking hair saved the man from dying apparently. I feel film theory (MatPat) should do a video how much human hair it would take to keep someone from dying. His "thing" besides over acting is he allegedly gets headaches and miagranes too easily. He clutches his head and whines. Yet.. he headbutts people? That makes absolutely no sense. He also enjoys having his head buffed a bit too much. His quirks besides belittling everyone hitting children.
The boys room is pretty sweet especially when he starts smoking pot. He has enough black lights, LED and so forth to make David Gilmour of Pink Floyd want to rehearse there.
If I didn't mention this already this movie is full of cliches.
Why is the bodyguard allowed to be in the class. This is almost as bad as when Detective John Kimble a police officer is allowed to be a kindergarten teacher in the movie Kindergarten Cop. Which I'll probably regret but this movie is better than. I don't know why the cheapskate father doesn't want to hire a second body guard as in a next scene you see these sociopathic boys mug the boy in front of Hulk like he can't do nothing. Either that or those two boys really need some glasses. The principal of that school looks like he's on some sort of watch list and shouldn't be allowed near children. Got to love show business right Bill Cosby.
The kids mercilessly mess with Hulk, with these really watered down pranks where even Kevin from Home Alone would say they are weak. From trying to trip him down the stairs to diving into a pool and getting red like a lobster. The stuff in the gym is probably my favorite. I doubt magnets are that strong with his little device that looks like something the kids mother would enjoy instead and then the bicycle smoking is probably not the smokiest place Hulk was that day. I thought for sure Blind Fury with Rutger Hauer.would be the most insultingly dumb slapstick movie but gosh darn. The stuff is just cruel, no charm, character or anything. Just mean kids. I wouldn't have laughed at this if I was their age when this atrocity came out. Home Alone 1 did a much better job.
The dad is such a bad actor, yet he's won some awards and is quite accomplished. He's so little, he delivers his lines so poorly. He lies to himself he's raising the kids alone. No he isn't that is like the rapper Drake trying to say he grew up in the ghetto when his mom was working at a school and his house had a pool. You guys are learning so much for those who are actually reading all my nonsense.
The scene where we cut to these people breaking into a safe with dollar store Steven Seagal and he manages to break into a safe with just his bare hands was silly. Either that or the dad is skimping on more than just hair cuts.
It isn't until Hulk screams at the kids that they grow to like him. How did the kids not know Shawn (Hulk) was a wrestler. I mean they are the ideal demographic to believe his nonsense.
What kills me is they are after a chip. I know the writers and all were not engineers but why don't they steal the schematic. Why would they want a useless chip that they would have to reverse engineer. That isn't cheap either. They end up putting the chip in the doll for safe keeping. Maybe this is where The Blacklist got the idea for the fulcrum.
Why does the limo have an ejector seat
In some ways Hulk Hogan and the gun in the dressing room is inspired by a real life event. However no one got shot.
By the looks of it when Mr. Jefferson is giving the rich kid all the weapons he really wants the kid expelled. Oh no, not the brass knuckles, here have a blackjack, a lead pipe. What's next a 22 caliber pistol? Columbine wasn't for another few years so what the heck.
Hulk dressed as a a ballarine is not the worst thing I've seen this month. Kurt Russel in drag in "Tango And Cash" with Sylvester Stallone was much worst and came out around then.
Just about every stereotype tries to grab the kids. Was the stereotype goons store having a special? We got an Asian who just happens to know karate. We got a super tall almost bullet proof European man. The European man looks so greasy.
The black woman is so mean, yet, she tries to lie near the end of the movie, oh i had a gut feeling you'd stick around. This woman isn't nice to anyone.
The boat fight near the end was really poorly lit. It's like it was one of the last scenes in the movie and they ran out of money.
Alright the last bit of nitpicking Why does Hulk have an AK47, they take it away and Mr Jefferson holds it with his feet in such a way you'd think he was going to end it all. I'd make a Kurt Cobain joke but Kurt was still alive when this happened. I don't think in a million years that Mr. Jefferson could have shot the rope off his hands with 15 or so bullets. No I think his whole wrists and or hands would have been gone.
The father goes back to being a cheap skate he gets Mr. Jefferson to be their nanny when Hulk takes a vacation. I hope the boy or father make a chip to make Mr. Jefferson walk normally again.
After seeing this trash it really makes it obvious how or why Hulk wasn't in very many movies afterwards. I mean when was the last time Dave Batista, John Cena or the worlds most over rated actor right now The Rock were in a wrestling ring? Oh well what do I know.
Ways this could improve a better script more tasteful "pranks" a better director some better casting the dad especially.
The introduction is so poorly edited when Hulk Hogan is getting beaten up by mostly jobbers which if you don't know wrestling lingo are wrestlers who their job is to make others look good. What kills me is he's in the ring with his silly fishing attire on. The movie is off to such a bad start because why can't it be that some of it impacts the story where there's some redemption. Then again this is a kids movie. Who cares. Of course Mr. Jefferson I mean Bert wants Hulk Hogan to be a body guard. Hulk doesn't at first and feels like he owes Bert.
Everyone in the fathers office has a bad accent. As if they are all trying to talk like Harley Quinn the one all those 14 year old girls romanticize about. I'm sure if Harley was there to see the hulkster beat all the security guards up to a really poorly choreographed pulp she would get flash backs of her and Mr. J. Alright enough Batman references. Seriously for a second I thought Ron Jeremy was one of the security guards. The one who got his head put through a wall. I love how the guy who hires him sees Hulk beat all these people up and goes he's hired! Then the second in command keeps saying oh no no.. don't hire him multiple times.
The psychotic" criminal genius" named. Tommy Thanatos which Thanatos is.the Greek god of death is so horrible of an actor. Seriously the Actor" should have stuck to singing in the New York Dolls. Maybe he hit his head for real. His first dastardly deed to "convince" the father in the movie to give him this chip called the "peace maker" is by putting a tiny bomb in his desk. He is given 24 hours to surrender the chip. The chip from my brief bit of attention to the beginning of the movie is that it will stop any missile. Wow.. riveting! Because of this Hulk Hogan is instead ordered to watch after his kids and grr.. he hates kids. The kids make such a great introduction. Their nanny runs out with her head on fire. Seriously, don't they put kids in juvie for stuff like that? At this point I realized how short and dirty the dad looked. Seriously you're going to be in a multi million dollar budged movie. He didn't have a haircut or anything. Was this some rich guys passion project to fund this nonsense.
What kills me is if the cook is so tough why doesn't she look after all the kids. They would be terrified of her with her infinite amounts of sass where she gives no one respect. She seems like one of those "woke" people who think everything is racist when she doesn't get her way.
What the heck is the father holding, it's like a really colorful calculator that prints faxes portability. He has the money for that but not a comb, hair spray, gel or a barber. The mom seemed to have kept them together. The father is that always busy cliche and only this steroid monster who constantly cheated on his wife and could fill that swimming pool with the alcohol or drugs he's ingested is giving advice?
The bad guy in this movie Tommy Thanatos is so over the top. I almost like how silly he is. He is like if Raul Julia in Street Fighter the movie didn't know when to calm down. The actor is so ugly and really only got the role for his voice. He has this metal bowl on his head. I guess he had his work done in some third world country for his injury I wonder if he had to turn to a life of crime to pay those crippling medical bills in America. Oh a splinter in your foot that'll be $999,999. Back to the movie How he got injured was he went head first off a building and into an empty pool when Hulk Hogan tossed him off as there was a gun involved and his ugly afro looking hair saved the man from dying apparently. I feel film theory (MatPat) should do a video how much human hair it would take to keep someone from dying. His "thing" besides over acting is he allegedly gets headaches and miagranes too easily. He clutches his head and whines. Yet.. he headbutts people? That makes absolutely no sense. He also enjoys having his head buffed a bit too much. His quirks besides belittling everyone hitting children.
The boys room is pretty sweet especially when he starts smoking pot. He has enough black lights, LED and so forth to make David Gilmour of Pink Floyd want to rehearse there.
If I didn't mention this already this movie is full of cliches.
Why is the bodyguard allowed to be in the class. This is almost as bad as when Detective John Kimble a police officer is allowed to be a kindergarten teacher in the movie Kindergarten Cop. Which I'll probably regret but this movie is better than. I don't know why the cheapskate father doesn't want to hire a second body guard as in a next scene you see these sociopathic boys mug the boy in front of Hulk like he can't do nothing. Either that or those two boys really need some glasses. The principal of that school looks like he's on some sort of watch list and shouldn't be allowed near children. Got to love show business right Bill Cosby.
The kids mercilessly mess with Hulk, with these really watered down pranks where even Kevin from Home Alone would say they are weak. From trying to trip him down the stairs to diving into a pool and getting red like a lobster. The stuff in the gym is probably my favorite. I doubt magnets are that strong with his little device that looks like something the kids mother would enjoy instead and then the bicycle smoking is probably not the smokiest place Hulk was that day. I thought for sure Blind Fury with Rutger Hauer.would be the most insultingly dumb slapstick movie but gosh darn. The stuff is just cruel, no charm, character or anything. Just mean kids. I wouldn't have laughed at this if I was their age when this atrocity came out. Home Alone 1 did a much better job.
The dad is such a bad actor, yet he's won some awards and is quite accomplished. He's so little, he delivers his lines so poorly. He lies to himself he's raising the kids alone. No he isn't that is like the rapper Drake trying to say he grew up in the ghetto when his mom was working at a school and his house had a pool. You guys are learning so much for those who are actually reading all my nonsense.
The scene where we cut to these people breaking into a safe with dollar store Steven Seagal and he manages to break into a safe with just his bare hands was silly. Either that or the dad is skimping on more than just hair cuts.
It isn't until Hulk screams at the kids that they grow to like him. How did the kids not know Shawn (Hulk) was a wrestler. I mean they are the ideal demographic to believe his nonsense.
What kills me is they are after a chip. I know the writers and all were not engineers but why don't they steal the schematic. Why would they want a useless chip that they would have to reverse engineer. That isn't cheap either. They end up putting the chip in the doll for safe keeping. Maybe this is where The Blacklist got the idea for the fulcrum.
Why does the limo have an ejector seat
In some ways Hulk Hogan and the gun in the dressing room is inspired by a real life event. However no one got shot.
By the looks of it when Mr. Jefferson is giving the rich kid all the weapons he really wants the kid expelled. Oh no, not the brass knuckles, here have a blackjack, a lead pipe. What's next a 22 caliber pistol? Columbine wasn't for another few years so what the heck.
Hulk dressed as a a ballarine is not the worst thing I've seen this month. Kurt Russel in drag in "Tango And Cash" with Sylvester Stallone was much worst and came out around then.
Just about every stereotype tries to grab the kids. Was the stereotype goons store having a special? We got an Asian who just happens to know karate. We got a super tall almost bullet proof European man. The European man looks so greasy.
The black woman is so mean, yet, she tries to lie near the end of the movie, oh i had a gut feeling you'd stick around. This woman isn't nice to anyone.
The boat fight near the end was really poorly lit. It's like it was one of the last scenes in the movie and they ran out of money.
Alright the last bit of nitpicking Why does Hulk have an AK47, they take it away and Mr Jefferson holds it with his feet in such a way you'd think he was going to end it all. I'd make a Kurt Cobain joke but Kurt was still alive when this happened. I don't think in a million years that Mr. Jefferson could have shot the rope off his hands with 15 or so bullets. No I think his whole wrists and or hands would have been gone.
The father goes back to being a cheap skate he gets Mr. Jefferson to be their nanny when Hulk takes a vacation. I hope the boy or father make a chip to make Mr. Jefferson walk normally again.
After seeing this trash it really makes it obvious how or why Hulk wasn't in very many movies afterwards. I mean when was the last time Dave Batista, John Cena or the worlds most over rated actor right now The Rock were in a wrestling ring? Oh well what do I know.
Ways this could improve a better script more tasteful "pranks" a better director some better casting the dad especially.