Tonight, I'm going to torture myself with Honor. I'm not expecting much though as I'm such a coward of a person. (That was an attempt at humor.)
What, a homage to They Live? Seriously?
Movie starts off with a bunch of contenders for Sugar Ray Leonard's series but they run down the wrong avenue and it looks like they're gonna have a Run DMC V.s. Jason Nevis dance off instead.
Rowdy Roddy Piper's introduced as a cop. Man, he looks old. He kind of resembles an old Bill Paxton.
The gang members seem to have inherited the Footclan's lair hangout from TMNT but up the ante by hosting underground UFC fightclubs going so far as breaking arms like Niko: Above the Law.
Iggy Pop buys some illicit street candy and bolts for his life as he's down to his last dollar.
Meanwhile Rowdy Roddy Piper is already marked for death by Grand Torino's Spider who's still aggravated about some past transgressions. Looking out of shape, and with a bad haircut, Rowdy Roddy Piper then throws out his acting career in a dumpster as Tyler Durden - was it Pitt or Norton? - shows up looking dishevelled and angry playing the character of Gabrielle, and no, not the cat from The Crow!
In a flashback we learn that the leader of The Orphans, from The Warriors, forced Norton at gunpoint to face off in a dustup knife fight which no doubt leaves some young pilgrim deceased.
Elsewhere, some sushi chef, in an apron gi, holds his own until three thugs use a Game Genie cheat code and overpower him then raid the cash register for $1 bills - some score.
I can hear what sounds like traces of the Commando score as these other thugs duke it out in the TMNT hideout lair.
It's established that Norton and Spider have beef which must be settled.
I've never seen this before - four baddies beat down a female police officer as a gang initiation.
Wow, Rowdy Roddy Piper is fighting Milli Vanilli, or Tintin, from The Crow in this scene here.
Remember those lyrics from that Slipknot song, "Too far gone, I'm catatonic, leaving me to criticise?" Have I forgotten how to have fun? I've watched a movie every night, for the past two weeks, and not one of them was any good. Tonight's no different either. I'm sitting here like a deformed cactus supposedly being entertained. The way it's going I'm going to commit myself into a looneybin. I can't help but to be snide and chuckle and snicker at movies today. As a kid I'd eat this up but being much older I'm taking offense at these movies today. Before I popped this DVD on I read The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle which was way better than this slugfest. The acting in this is a drag, man.
There's lots of bravado and aggression but little in the way of substance and plot. Add all the constant sorrow and brooding and you have a recipe for a dower dividend return. I'm an hour and 9-minutes into this movie and I wish it was over already. The prefomances just aren't convincing and Rowdy Roddy Piper mumbles a lot of his lines which were meaningless to begin with.
Not to mention the shaky camera work at the end fight scene which is all wobbly.
Speaking of the finale, it's like Mortal Kombat 2, they get beaten up badly at first but come to their senses - like Hulk Hogan used to with his hand and arm raised - and smash back winning easily.
I really thought the cop lady would have burst through and shot the baddie at the end. But he wastes himself instead. (That would have been a good DVD cover for representation.) But what a way to end the movie though with 'that' toothy giggle. Brilliant.
One thing I'll give this movie is that it's better than Jesse Ventura's Abraxas. Now there's a movie to avoid at all costs! It's like an anemic Terminator in need of a feed; better script and actors, possibly even a blood transfusion and Hollywood makeover like Pimp My Ride.
Checkout Abraxas for paper thin.
P. S. "I'll hunt you down like an orange and peel you." Um, okay.
Movie starts off with a bunch of contenders for Sugar Ray Leonard's series but they run down the wrong avenue and it looks like they're gonna have a Run DMC V.s. Jason Nevis dance off instead.
Rowdy Roddy Piper's introduced as a cop. Man, he looks old. He kind of resembles an old Bill Paxton.
The gang members seem to have inherited the Footclan's lair hangout from TMNT but up the ante by hosting underground UFC fightclubs going so far as breaking arms like Niko: Above the Law.
Iggy Pop buys some illicit street candy and bolts for his life as he's down to his last dollar.
Meanwhile Rowdy Roddy Piper is already marked for death by Grand Torino's Spider who's still aggravated about some past transgressions. Looking out of shape, and with a bad haircut, Rowdy Roddy Piper then throws out his acting career in a dumpster as Tyler Durden - was it Pitt or Norton? - shows up looking dishevelled and angry playing the character of Gabrielle, and no, not the cat from The Crow!
In a flashback we learn that the leader of The Orphans, from The Warriors, forced Norton at gunpoint to face off in a dustup knife fight which no doubt leaves some young pilgrim deceased.
Elsewhere, some sushi chef, in an apron gi, holds his own until three thugs use a Game Genie cheat code and overpower him then raid the cash register for $1 bills - some score.
I can hear what sounds like traces of the Commando score as these other thugs duke it out in the TMNT hideout lair.
It's established that Norton and Spider have beef which must be settled.
I've never seen this before - four baddies beat down a female police officer as a gang initiation.
Wow, Rowdy Roddy Piper is fighting Milli Vanilli, or Tintin, from The Crow in this scene here.
Remember those lyrics from that Slipknot song, "Too far gone, I'm catatonic, leaving me to criticise?" Have I forgotten how to have fun? I've watched a movie every night, for the past two weeks, and not one of them was any good. Tonight's no different either. I'm sitting here like a deformed cactus supposedly being entertained. The way it's going I'm going to commit myself into a looneybin. I can't help but to be snide and chuckle and snicker at movies today. As a kid I'd eat this up but being much older I'm taking offense at these movies today. Before I popped this DVD on I read The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle which was way better than this slugfest. The acting in this is a drag, man.
There's lots of bravado and aggression but little in the way of substance and plot. Add all the constant sorrow and brooding and you have a recipe for a dower dividend return. I'm an hour and 9-minutes into this movie and I wish it was over already. The prefomances just aren't convincing and Rowdy Roddy Piper mumbles a lot of his lines which were meaningless to begin with.
Not to mention the shaky camera work at the end fight scene which is all wobbly.
Speaking of the finale, it's like Mortal Kombat 2, they get beaten up badly at first but come to their senses - like Hulk Hogan used to with his hand and arm raised - and smash back winning easily.
I really thought the cop lady would have burst through and shot the baddie at the end. But he wastes himself instead. (That would have been a good DVD cover for representation.) But what a way to end the movie though with 'that' toothy giggle. Brilliant.
One thing I'll give this movie is that it's better than Jesse Ventura's Abraxas. Now there's a movie to avoid at all costs! It's like an anemic Terminator in need of a feed; better script and actors, possibly even a blood transfusion and Hollywood makeover like Pimp My Ride.
Checkout Abraxas for paper thin.
P. S. "I'll hunt you down like an orange and peel you." Um, okay.