Review of The Kiss Before the Mirror

. . . Constitutionally guaranteed to all U. S. men, documents THE KISS BEFORE THE MIRROR. Horrible harlot spouses such as Lucy and Maria must be dispatched with absolute finality (three shots minimum), KISS recommends. Any guy who would allow his spouse to leave his home by herself for hours on end should have his head examined, KISS reveals. If a gentleman lacks a mother who is able to chaperone his wife when the latter female ventures outside the home, he's well-advised to remain a bachelor, KISS suggests. All the U. S. wives pictured during KISS are dead-set upon primping and posing in front of mirrors as they plot whose VeeDee germs they can cart home to their marriage bed next. Such faithless varmints can bring a man only heartbreak, despair and disease. Just as every school, church and library comes equipped with fire alarms, every marriage contract MUST include a trusty revolver with plenty of ammo for the prospective groom in order to keep inherently deceptive, vacillating and pox-ridden brides toeing the line.