I recently dusted off a box of VHS's in my loft and unearthed some long forgotten treasures. For anyone that was born after the year 2000, a VHS is how mummy and daddy used to watch home movies, it's like a big piece of plastic that... oh never mind, it's pointless explaining that, because the next thing I am going to have to explain is this movie that I'm reviewing; Rod Amateau's "The Garbage Pail Kids Movie". Strap yourself in because this is a super cringe-fest, even people who lived through this haven't got much love for it so new audiences are going to wonder WTF this hideous creation is. A young boy called Dodger is being bullied, one day the bullies take it to the extreme. They've already assaulted him and robbed him, but that's just harmless 1980's fun. They follow him to his work where the lead bully's girlfriend, Tangerine, is being nice to him out of guilt. The bullies kidnap him, and then handcuff him in a sewer and pour sewage onto him - it's the 80's, they're just having a laugh. Dodger is rescued by mysterious little people who go by the name of the Garbage Pail Kids. The GPK's came to Earth in a garbage can spaceship and were released from it when one of the bullies knocked the garbage can over in the shop where Dodger works, run by Captain Manzini. He introduced Dodger to the GPK's properly but tells Dodger that they can't leave the shop, or the "normies" (normal people) would attack them - they also can't go back into the garbage can without magic. Dodger and Tangerine go to a nightclub where it turns out that Tangerine is an aspiring fashion designer and sells some clothes. At the same time, the GPK's have leave the shop and cause 1980's mayhem - you know, stealing trucks, wrecking cars, and eating too much around a campfire in an alleyway. It's ok though, they sew a jacket for Dodger, which Tangerine likes. She plans to sell clothes if Dodger can get them for her, but she is repulsed when she meets the GPK's - not to worry though, she plans on exploiting them. She locks them in a basement sweatshop, but she isn't aware that her boyfriend the bully has arranged for the GPK's to be rounded up and sent to the State Home of the Ugly. Dodger and Manzini break the GPK's out, so they go to trash the fashion show that Tangerine was going to use to flog her wares. Dodger gets into a fight with the bullies, but the bullies get arrested by the police. Tangerine offers Dodger an apology, but Dodger tells her to stick it. Manzini attempts to trap the GPK's in their garbage can spaceship prison but fails. And the movie ends with eh GPK's driving off in on an ATV. I watched this film as a 7- or 8-year-old and it didn't matter that it made no sense because it had pretty colour and gross things were 'cool'. I remember watching this again as a drunk university student with my housemates as we tried to out-do each other with bad films - I won a few bets that night (but no friends!). As I watch this again as a 40+ year old I haven't been able to find many good things to say about it. The only thing that has kept me from ejecting the VHS and burning it is a sense of nostalgia. Having a copy in my hands reminded me of a simpler time were I was a lot younger and carefree. As far as the film goes though - please heed my warning. I've watched this rubbish so you don't have to. Read a book, make a cake, go for a walk - anything. This doesn't deserve your time.
Review of The Garbage Pail Kids Movie
