Okay so at the beginning of this one some people blast an opening to some cave where they find some glyphs / 'ancient markings' .
then we meet Danielle, who apparently works as some Engineer monitoring some dam or something, she has a parrot and loves to drink vodka right out of the bottle.
and JUSTIN, her BF? he has a couple of great lines when they speak
+1 Star for California Elk Pi$$ line
Wait is she not an engineer? She's some forest Ranger? Little bit of huge responsibility for a Forest Ranger to be draining a dam? And I can tell that the way Danielle talks she has no business being a forest ranger anyway. She sounds like a nutter.
-1 Star for Forest Ranger Danny being a nutter......
Apparently Danny's best friend Julie died in a car accident that was Danny's fault and Danny blames herself for her friends death. And Danny is obviously not dykey enough to be a forest ranger either. Anyways at least we get past all the mushy stuff and we get to Justin and Danny doin' it. Will they break the rule??? Yes it appears they will!!!!
-1 Star for a sex scene with absolutely no nudity. We don't approve!
Then somehow all their clothes got back on . There's some creature outside making noise. Justin says that ain't no bear!! He tells Danny to call for help and he gets his rifle!!!
Anyways that crisis passes. Then they meet the token couple hiking in the woods. They warn this couple of the creature that might be out there. Male hiker he doesn't like being warned! And he has a great line!!!
+1 Star for a great line!
Then that couple they run into that creature in the WOODS!!! And they both get a GREAT DEATH!!! And then RANGER TEAM they find their JEEP ripped apart,. And the camper bodies have been stsashed on top of their RANGER TOWER!!! Oh dear this creature is smart too!!! How it hung up that dead couple in the ranger TOWER!!! Wow really they bury this couple?? They got time to dig 2 graves? That's just really dumb. This creature could be anywhere.
-1 Star for not worrying about creature at all who just ripped 2 hikers up hung them up and skinned them
Then it's a good time for flirting and kissing. Danny and Justin just can't keep their hands off each other, despite being in TREMENDOUS FEAR FOR THEIR LIVES!!! IT IS TIME FOR SOME TONGUE HOCKEY!!!
-1 sTAR AGAIN!!!
THEN It appears that JUSTIN runs into the creature in the WOODS. I don't think he's gonna walk away from that one. Then Danny finds Justin's body on top of the TOWER. Danny has time for digging a grave for him too!!!! REally weird how much time she has to spend digging graves, with this creature out there who could appear ANYTIME!!!
oKAY now RANGER DANNY IS ON THE CASE!!! SHE STARTS opening cans of corn and beans and making a giant pile of......well OF CORN AND BEANS.....!! What is that supposed to be?? Bait???
So something shows up and Danny blasts that thing!! But there is no body!!! And Danny decides to escape with the PARROT!!! wAIT she's gonna track this thing?? LOL too far to walk to get the heck out of there?? But I can go track this creature to 'where it lives'. Oh dear.
Oh she finds that Justin's head was put on display also!!! And she digs a grave for Justins head!!! Oh and while she's wandering through everything she meets UNCAS, and UNCAS just happens to be living in some trailer nearby and tells her all about the CAVE SPIRIT that his students uncovered!!
But then she doesn't give up!! She continues her hunt!!!! She is rewarded!!!! She meets the creature and it doesn't kill her!!! It takes a bite of flesh out of her and flies off!!! Why?? Why does it fly off?? Why didn't it kill her????
-1 STar because it killed everyone else it met, except her.....
Okay so she finds the hiker's phone and calls her BOSS. HER BOSS comes and picks her up and on the way back they find A BODY MOUNTED ON A POLE!!!!
+1 STAR FOR THAT BODY MOUNTED ON THAT POLE RIGHT UP HIS COLO!!! Man you cannot unsee that lol
But BOSS he gets crushed!!! And Danny she's driving the JEEP now and she's on the run!!! Creature can fly and it's chasing her a$$!! Omg she craftily kills it with dynamite???? Wow is she smart!!!
So now she can walk out of there. Then she's talking to a COP? She says there's bodies up there somewhere, and she doesn't know who killed them!!! And then...THE PARROT shows up at her HOUSE?? How did the Parrot find her HOUSE? Okay what is the final score for this stinker???
I guess it finished with a 3. Boy what a pile of crap. A couple of good lines but the rest of it, pretty damn bad. 3/10
then we meet Danielle, who apparently works as some Engineer monitoring some dam or something, she has a parrot and loves to drink vodka right out of the bottle.
and JUSTIN, her BF? he has a couple of great lines when they speak
+1 Star for California Elk Pi$$ line
Wait is she not an engineer? She's some forest Ranger? Little bit of huge responsibility for a Forest Ranger to be draining a dam? And I can tell that the way Danielle talks she has no business being a forest ranger anyway. She sounds like a nutter.
-1 Star for Forest Ranger Danny being a nutter......
Apparently Danny's best friend Julie died in a car accident that was Danny's fault and Danny blames herself for her friends death. And Danny is obviously not dykey enough to be a forest ranger either. Anyways at least we get past all the mushy stuff and we get to Justin and Danny doin' it. Will they break the rule??? Yes it appears they will!!!!
-1 Star for a sex scene with absolutely no nudity. We don't approve!
Then somehow all their clothes got back on . There's some creature outside making noise. Justin says that ain't no bear!! He tells Danny to call for help and he gets his rifle!!!
Anyways that crisis passes. Then they meet the token couple hiking in the woods. They warn this couple of the creature that might be out there. Male hiker he doesn't like being warned! And he has a great line!!!
+1 Star for a great line!
Then that couple they run into that creature in the WOODS!!! And they both get a GREAT DEATH!!! And then RANGER TEAM they find their JEEP ripped apart,. And the camper bodies have been stsashed on top of their RANGER TOWER!!! Oh dear this creature is smart too!!! How it hung up that dead couple in the ranger TOWER!!! Wow really they bury this couple?? They got time to dig 2 graves? That's just really dumb. This creature could be anywhere.
-1 Star for not worrying about creature at all who just ripped 2 hikers up hung them up and skinned them
Then it's a good time for flirting and kissing. Danny and Justin just can't keep their hands off each other, despite being in TREMENDOUS FEAR FOR THEIR LIVES!!! IT IS TIME FOR SOME TONGUE HOCKEY!!!
-1 sTAR AGAIN!!!
THEN It appears that JUSTIN runs into the creature in the WOODS. I don't think he's gonna walk away from that one. Then Danny finds Justin's body on top of the TOWER. Danny has time for digging a grave for him too!!!! REally weird how much time she has to spend digging graves, with this creature out there who could appear ANYTIME!!!
oKAY now RANGER DANNY IS ON THE CASE!!! SHE STARTS opening cans of corn and beans and making a giant pile of......well OF CORN AND BEANS.....!! What is that supposed to be?? Bait???
So something shows up and Danny blasts that thing!! But there is no body!!! And Danny decides to escape with the PARROT!!! wAIT she's gonna track this thing?? LOL too far to walk to get the heck out of there?? But I can go track this creature to 'where it lives'. Oh dear.
Oh she finds that Justin's head was put on display also!!! And she digs a grave for Justins head!!! Oh and while she's wandering through everything she meets UNCAS, and UNCAS just happens to be living in some trailer nearby and tells her all about the CAVE SPIRIT that his students uncovered!!
But then she doesn't give up!! She continues her hunt!!!! She is rewarded!!!! She meets the creature and it doesn't kill her!!! It takes a bite of flesh out of her and flies off!!! Why?? Why does it fly off?? Why didn't it kill her????
-1 STar because it killed everyone else it met, except her.....
Okay so she finds the hiker's phone and calls her BOSS. HER BOSS comes and picks her up and on the way back they find A BODY MOUNTED ON A POLE!!!!
+1 STAR FOR THAT BODY MOUNTED ON THAT POLE RIGHT UP HIS COLO!!! Man you cannot unsee that lol
But BOSS he gets crushed!!! And Danny she's driving the JEEP now and she's on the run!!! Creature can fly and it's chasing her a$$!! Omg she craftily kills it with dynamite???? Wow is she smart!!!
So now she can walk out of there. Then she's talking to a COP? She says there's bodies up there somewhere, and she doesn't know who killed them!!! And then...THE PARROT shows up at her HOUSE?? How did the Parrot find her HOUSE? Okay what is the final score for this stinker???
I guess it finished with a 3. Boy what a pile of crap. A couple of good lines but the rest of it, pretty damn bad. 3/10