Foosballers (2019)
8/10
NO. SPINNING. ALLOWED.
18 April 2020
It's important to know that I grew up playing a little bit of foosball. Not a ton, and not against any type of talent, but enough where I was able to pass it back and forth to myself and blast home some super rad shots. I'm also "seasoned" enough to know that spinning in Foosball is the biggest noob move going. If you're a cute girl who's doing it to laugh it up, that's fine. But that's it. Not even you cute guys can spin and it's not up for debate. There is no spinning in Foosball.

With all that burped up and on the table, let us get on with the movie at hand. Foosballers is one of...not many films about the undervalued table sport. You have this gem and then you have the 1981 film Long Shot and then a mockumentary called The Fabb Four made in 2008, and lastly a short doc called Foosball: past - present - future made in 2006. That's about it. So there's some slim picking if you got a hankering for some foosball action.

Minus Longshot which is a teen comedy that's probably more about getting the girl than getting the trophy, Foosballers is the undisputed champ of Foosballery. It paints us a handsome picture of it's heyday, it's downfall, it's rules and everything in between. And of course, it talks to us about the players that got the sport rolling in the early days all the way up to the leading men and women knocking that little ball around to this day.

Foosballers is a total success of a documentary. Like any other atypical topic, from video game high scores, to the best arm-wrestler in the world, to big wave surfers, there is an underlying factor that must be expressed. And that, my quarantined friends, is passion. Which could just be a diagnosis for advanced addiction with narcissistic tendencies, but who's to say. Could just be love for the game though. Oh, I don't know. What I do know is that addiction for Foosyfoos is on display big time and it's fun to watch.

To sum this up, Foosballers brought home the bacon and fried it in the pan. It shot it's little ball right up and straight into my heart. I'm now on the hunt for a used Tornado foosblaster3000 and mark my words, you will hear of me the next time the you hear the word Foosball. I will be king. My Foosball name will forever be echoed in bathrooms of gamerooms everywhere. Everyone's going down. Tony. Todd. Cindy. You're all dust! Forever shall my name be trembled and feared. For my foosball name is...FOOZBALLGUY23!
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