Review of Ring Ring

Ring Ring (I) (2019)
3/10
Not sure what they were going for...
25 July 2019
"Ring Ring" starts out as sort of an office comedy, where Will (Malcolm Goodwin) and Amber (Kirby Bliss Blanton) work at some sort of building supply and remodeling company making cold calls (their boss is Lou Ferrigno, who makes a "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry" joke). The boss tells the staff that the company is closing, and Will, Amber, and another friend decide that if they can get the client list, they could start a company and convince the clients to use them instead (I know, but just go with it). So they break into the boss's office and use Will's phone to take photos of the client list.

They go out to a bar to celebrate, and Will hooks up with a hot girl (and he's also drunk beyond belief) and that causes him to leave his phone at the bar. Since it has the client list, it's really important to find, and so the next day, he and Amber use "Find my Phone" to find the location of the phone, and call a ride share to go get the phone back. In an amazing coincidence, the driver is Jacob, the guy who found (and then stole) the phone and he brings them to his house. He's not home (since he's in the car), so they break in. When they eventually go into his basement, he sneaks in and locks them in the basement.

I'm not at all sure what they were going for. The comedy was... OK, I guess. But I think it meant to get to horror or suspense but there was just nothing to it. I mean, nothing really happens. After they are locked in the basement, we might be expecting "horror" or scary stuff but, no, they just stay in the basement and Jacob stays upstairs getting high. The movie is less than an hour and fifteen minutes long, and stuff doesn't really start to happen until an hour into it. And even then, it's not very much.

The shortness of the movie is extra weird since there is stuff hinted at that would have been interesting to know and we don't learn any of it. Amber is a druggy who got arrested and her car was seized, and she told Will that it was for possession, but she whispers to Jacob what it really was and he reacted like it was something worse. But we never find out. There's a seemingly important backstory about Jacob, his mother, and a friend which is hinted at in a conversation that lasts a couple of minutes and then it's dropped. And the ending... wow, it's bad. Really bad.

The three leads give strong performances all around, but just, bleh.
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