2/10
It would have probably been easier to just move to New Mexico
4 January 2017
Warning: Spoilers
I saw this film under the title, "Escape 2000" as an episode of the cult riffing show, Mystery Science Theater 3000. This film is a sequel to a film called, "The Bronx Warriors". Both Italian made films that feature a lot of shots in New York that were probably done without permission and lots of studio shots back in Italy. I am rather surprised the score here is as high as it is, because this film is rather ludicrous! My guess is the "Bronx Warriors" was probably a better film, I mean, it had to be or why make a sequel? Though considering it was Italian made, I am also guessing not much better. Do not get me wrong, I enjoy their horror films and they made some good westerns too, but films like these just did not work as well. It does not help that they try to pass the film off as happening in New York and you end up in the underground which is so European looking it is pathetic! Lots of people flying all over the place due to explosions, lots of nonsensical plot points and lots of dudes with really awesome hair!

The story has the Bronx being under siege by a horde of men wearing silver outfits with helmets for no discernible reason whatsoever. Their mission, to rid the Bronx of the gangs by any means necessary! Which means either relocating them to New Mexico or killing them! An evil corporate president wants to build a wonderful city in the Bronx place and wishes to start by building a children's hospital, the animal! Meanwhile, a man named Trash who apparently did something in the previous movie decides to fight back when his folks are killed, but midway through the movie, he becomes almost a secondary hero as another guy comes along to blow things up and help Trash kidnap the president along with a very unattractive news reporter. Sadly, in the end, they really accomplish absolutely nothing, they don't even escape the Bronx.

This film made a very funny episode of MST3K. I had never seen this film until now as I was never able to see the show until the sci-fi channel years. So many jokes and I almost could not stop laughing when they first kidnapped the president and began running from the extermination squads and things were blowing up and the bodies were flying! The movie featured a woman reporter who they made fun of her appearance, because she was very vampire and rat looking. It is strange as Italian films either have some of the most attractive women you can see, or they have some of the least attractive on screen!

So no, I do not really see why anyone would really like this film. The sets look bad, the action is borderline silly and you endure watching this thing all the way through and you are rewarded with almost a non ending. Perhaps they made a third film as there was still some stuff left unresolved as the president of the company was dead and another guy took his place and the Bronx were kind of littered with bodies, but the key members of the resistance were left alive. Of course, a totally awesome ending would have them going to New Mexico and going, "Hey, this isn't so bad!"
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