Christmas Belle (2013 TV Movie)
1/10
Torture
6 December 2015
I'm not someone who rags on TV movies. I enjoy them most of the time, despite their flaws. But this one is absolute garbage that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. For starters, the other reviewers were right about the music. Oh my God the music! It's this cheesy canned e-card piano music that never ever stops for one single second. It will drive you insane! I cannot stress enough how awful it is and how it ruins any chance this movie had of being a good experience. However I did try to look past it and see if there was anything of worth in the movie that the ear-bleeding music was hiding. Sadly, there was nothing.

The story is a flimsy take on Beauty & the Beast. The Christmas part is irrelevant. Haylie Duff is the beauty and, while she's certainly giving it her best, after awhile you get tired of her character being a doormat for every man in the movie and you just give up caring what happens to her. Nicholas Gonzalez is the beast, a jerk with few redeeming qualities who seems to suffer from an unfortunate shirt allergy. His character's tragic backstory does little to make us care about him. We just want him to shut up and (some of us) want him to put on a shirt. He also "gets the wrong idea" repeatedly just to give the movie some manufactured angst. So annoying and yet another character trait you'll find yourself asking "Who wants to deal with that?" It's nonsense like this that makes it hard to root for the main characters to get together. Supporting cast is not much better, led by a supremely annoying C. Thomas Howell as the worst dad ever. Then we have Mark Famiglietti as one of the most despicable characters I've ever seen in one of these TV movies. He's the 'other guy,' the one the girl is never going to end up with and we all know it from the first minute of the movie but have to suffer through feigned uncertainty for the sake of the predictable plot. This guy is given no positive traits and, as the movie goes along, you begin to wonder if there's some kind of fake-out going on and this is actually going to be a thriller where he kills Haylie Duff and the beast guy must solve her murder. At least then some of the movie would have made more sense. Anyway, avoid this trash at all costs. It's poorly acted, written, and directed. It's sappy, schmaltzy, corny, cheesy, dumb, obnoxious, and offensive to the senses. That music! That *expletive deleted* music!
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