5/10
Conan goes PG.
2 February 2013
Warning: Spoilers
This mildly entertaining sequel to "Conan the Barbarian" is, unsurprisingly, not in the same league as its predecessor. The basic problem is a common one for many viewers: this is a somewhat watered-down, PG-rated Conan that just doesn't have a lot of intensity. Ultimately it gets too fantastically silly for its own good, in an obvious attempt to bring in the younger audience. It's not the same seeing Conan in this kind of juvenile adventure. The quest that Conan and comrades embark upon is also lacking in any truly perilous episodes. It certainly was typical of the kind of low-grade stuff that veteran director Richard Fleischer ("20,000 Leagues Under the Sea", "The Narrow Margin") was churning out at this stage in his career.

Arnold Schwarzenegger returns as the muscle-bound Cimmerian warrior who is approached by an icy Queen (Sarah Douglas) with an offer: accompany a princess named Jehnna (Olivia d'Abo) on a journey she must take according to prophecy. In return, she will restore his great love Valeria to life. Of course, since this Queen is played by Douglas, otherwise known as Ursa in two of the "Superman" movies, we KNOW that she's going to have a nefarious agenda going on.

Conan is accompanied by characters such as Bombaata (basketball legend Wilt Chamberlain, in his only film role), a feisty fighter named Zula (the always striking Grace Jones), a goofball thief, Malak (the great eccentric character actor Tracey Walter), and the wizard Akiro (Mako, also returning from the first film).

On location filming in Mexico helps a great deal, as well as solid work from talents such as production designer Pier Luigi Basile and the legendary cinematographer Jack Cardiff. The music by Basil Poledouris is also a very worthy component. Carlo Rambaldi created the amusingly designed monster-god Dagoth, and it's highly amusing to note that this creation was played by none other than wrestling star Andre Roussimoff, a.k.a. Andre the Giant.

Unfortunately there is no epic feel to this sequel, and while there is violence, it doesn't have a lot of punch. The finale when Dagoth comes to life is at least fairly entertaining. The acting is either hammy (Mako), adequate, or hilariously stiff (Chamberlain and Jones). Walter, while very reliable most of the time, acts too contemporary and is simply out of place here.

All things considered, this viewer can see why some fantasy fans would be very dissatisfied with "Conan the Destroyer". It's actually not that bad as entertainment, but it's better to take it on its own terms rather than compare it to "Barbarian", as it would always come up short.

Five out of 10.
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