Brigitte takes on pornography (but not the way you might think)
26 November 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Brigitte Lahaie proves she can carry a picture without having to do explicit sex playing Martine, a tough female cop. Unfortunately, writer/director Michel Caputo lets her down by delivering an incoherent script (with René Château) and including too many unbelievable action scenes. Of course, Brigitte wouldn't be herself is she didn't take her clothes off repeatedly. This is one cop who spends a lot of time in her own private Jacuzzi.

When we first see her on the job, Martine is on the trail of a bunch of, what else, pornographers. She decides to take on some thugs (carrying a cardboard box filled with video nasties) singlehandedly. It then turns out she's being backed up by a helicopter, but what good does that do in a fistfight? Martine is sleeping with a young police officer, but compared to what we are used to seeing Lahaie do in the bedroom, this only amounts to some mutual fondling. She soon swaps this young guy for the more mature and experienced Jean, but he turns out to be even less proficient in the sack, being more interested in showing off his party trick of taking apart and resembling his big pistol.

For some strange reason, Brigitte and her various co-workers are presented as a bunch of bunglers that would make the Police Academy gang jealous. This wouldn't be so bad if L'Executrice wasn't played perfectly straight. First of all, the coppers are tipped off that a young girl named Caroline is to be kidnapped while visiting a hospital, yet Brigitte and her incompetent partner still let it happen right under their noses. Seeing as she has a blond snitch in place at the club 'Le Cloitre', Brigitte knows who is behind the kidnapping: a scar-faced woman who oozes mean. However, when they pick her up for questioning, it turns out the police commissioner is an old acquaintance of this black hearted (and haired) witch, so Brigite is unable to pin anything on her. The cops then spend quite a lot of time trying to find the kidnap victim, but it's Brigitte's little snitch that eventually helps Caroline escape. No points for la police as yet.

Things get even less believable when Brigitte is attacked and almost raped by two orientals in her parking garage. Fortunately a Charles Bronson type night watchman arrives on the seen sporting an enormous sawed off shot gun. What is more, the orientals don't run at the sight of this impressive weapon, but keep on advancing on 'Bronson'. Next, three guys in extremely silly Halloween costumes are harassing a homeless man when Brigitte and Jean happen to arrive on the scene. So, they take them on barehanded, even managing to hit one of the thugs repeatedly in the face despite the fact that he's wearing a motorcycle helmet. I suppose it does help that his helmet keeps changing from shot to shot: one moment the chin protection is gone, the next it's back again.

Trying to find out how the Chinamen are involved, Brigitte stages a break-in at a whorehouse where all the prostitutes are Chinese and the bodyguards are Negro. Jean goes on a revenge spree of his own, using the two great loves in his life: his motorcycle and his Magnum 44. However, during a shootout at a quarry Jean is unexpectedly blown to bits when he runs into a wooden shed filled with explosives. This leaves a depressed Martine sitting in her Jacuzzi and practicing her deceased lover's party trick. When she is attacked in her own home, she makes sure her would be assassin is torched. She then seeks out Antoine, the commissioners son (who's girlfriend got blown up together with Jean in the shack). He unwillingly helps her to bring down the female scarface and expose the commissioner's treachery. At least I think that's what happened, it all seemed so confusing and messed up to me, I could be mistaken.

5 out of 10
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