The Missing (I) (2003)
5/10
Tommy Lee as "Tommy Lee".....yet again
10 February 2006
Although "The Missing" is generally regarded as director Ron Howard's weakest film, there are few complaints about his casting or his acting for the camera directing. Most of the criticism is reserved for the film's total lack of unity, as the first half, an excellent example of a realistic frontier western, is totally disconnected from the second half which tries to be a supernatural thriller. You can't have it both ways, even if it were possible to adequately tie the two disparate halves together each has its own completely different target audience.

All this means that those who enjoy the first half will be looking around the room at the halfway point trying to discover where their film went, while those who might have enjoyed the new direction will have turned off the film before the segments that might interest them even make it to the screen. This seems like something the producer should have identified and corrected before a single frame of film was shot.

Tommy Lee plays a white man in 19th century New Mexico who has elected to live as an Indian, insert "Hombre" here. In yet another reprise of his character in "The Fugitive", he (big surprise) is not big on smiling or on emotional displays of any kind. Cate Blanchett plays his estranged (and widowed) daughter Maggie who lives out on a primitive ranch with her two daughters Lily (Evan Rachel Wood) and Dot (Jenna Boyd-the little girl with the creepy smile in "Dickie Roberts"). Tommy Lee arrives at the ranch at the beginning of the film seeking to reconcile with his daughter. Unfortunately the intensity of Maggie's initial rejection tips off age eight and older viewers that they will patch things up by the end of the film.

Feminine daughter Lily is soon abducted by a mixed band of Apache scouts and white renegades. Tommy Lee, Maggie, and tomboy daughter Dot take off after them.

It is about this time that things go from gritty realistic to weird and stupid as we meet Eric Schweig, who has had the Indian role in most of the movies made since 1990. And guess what? He's an Indian; a witchdoctor or shaman or shape-shifter called Pesh-Chidin or El Brujo or that weird ugly guy with all the snakes. And more guess what: He looks spooky and his magic really works. He hangs snakes from trees and throws the poisonous dust from magic beans in the eyes of his enemies.

Dr. Brujo has masterminded a plot in which his gang will abduct eight virgins and sell them for more magic beans down in Mexico. He even manages to bewitch Maggie from a distance. Busy as he is, Dr. Brujo still manages to find time to berate his housekeeper, whip his deformed stupid assistants, and critique the world's first known bondage photos.

It's nonstop boredom and yawns aplenty in the second half of this genre-bridging low-key quasi-thriller.

Then again, what do I know? I'm only a child.
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