LOVERS LANE is truly the ultimate "B-movie double" film, though, as a horror film, it truly fails (blame production values). Okay, let's first round up the "B-movie doubles" in the film: Erin J. Dean, who plays the heroine, mousy Mandy Anderson (daughter of the sheriff), is Rachael Leigh Cook; Riley Smith, the hero, popular Michael Lamson (son of the high school principal), is James Van Der Beek; high school principal Penny Lamson (Suzanne Bouchard) is Barbara Hershey; Sheriff Anderson (Matt Riedy) looks like an older version of DREW CAREY'S Ryan Stiles, but veteran character actor Fred Ward would have made a perfect Sheriff Anderson; Dr. Jack Grefe (Richard Sanders), a psychiatrist at the state institute who is also the sheriff's half-brother (hardly ever developed), is a dead ringer for the actor who played Les Nessman in WKRP IN CINCINNATI (oh wait, it's the same actor); Michael's pal Brad (Ben Indra) is a dead ringer for CRIMSON TIDE's Danny Nucci (okay, yeah, he was also the best friend in TITANIC); and bitchy Chloe Grefe (Sarah Lancaster of SAVED BY THE BELL: THE NEW CLASS), Michael's girlfriend and the daughter of Dr. Jack Grefe (making her Mandy's cousin, something that is never fully developed), is any vampy blonde in any teen flick of the last half-century (if you had to pick one, let's say Sarah Michelle Gellar in CRUEL INTENTIONS).
Rounding out the cast are: Doug, the horny loser (Billy O'Sullivan), cheerleader and new-girl-in-town Jannelle (Anna Faris of SCARY MOVIE and its sequel, AND THE ONLY REASON to watch this film, especially because she shows off her natural blonde hair and yet seems intelligent), and couple Tim (Collin F. Peacock) and Cathy (Megan Victoria Hunt), who can't keep their hands off each other.
Good things: the camera work looks promising, and the pace is so-so. The story, however, is never fully developed, and the killer with the hook for a hand lacks a personality. The scrawling of "Prison food sucks" in blood found after the killer escapes from the institute (an ode to HALLOWEEN but without the suspense of the actual escape) raises a big question mark. Why did the killer brutally murder a young couple (apparently locked in an extramarital affair) on Lovers Lane thirteen years before? Although the movie has a twist ending (which is pretty confusing), this question seems rhetorical to the fact. There are only three really good, terrifying scenes, all of which involve the murder of one of the aforementioned teens: one of them, incapacitated on a kitchen table with a broken leg, is tortured by the killer with knives (and the hook, eventually); another one sits terrified on a bed, until the killer makes a surprise appearance from (where else?) underneath the bed; and, lastly, another teen meets a grisly end next to a car window.
Bad acting: none really; it's expected of a B-movie anyway. The sheriff, in the opening scene, seems like he was the worst actor in his community theater, but does an okay job for the rest of the movie. The other actors, especially Dean and Faris, are really good (playing a teenager isn't that hard), but only if you can hear them (the boom mike must've been bought secondhand or something). Overall, the film was bad. This is a horror film where the high school principal punches a drunken female student in a bowling alley, where the sheriff meets his daughter in town but doesn't seem truly concerned that a violent killer has escaped from the state institute and is headed their way, where a dimwitted deputy reholsters his weapon BEFORE examining what's behind a curtain, where it is said, in the opening scene, that the sheriff and Dr. Grefe are half-brothers, yet that fact, CRUCIAL to the storyline, is hardly ever developed! And yes, not one, not two, but THREE scenes involve animals creating suspense! (Does the dog's head count as an entire animal?)
The worst, however, is the resolution following the film's climax/revelation phase. SPOILER: The only surviving teens sit in the back of a police SUV, awaiting a ride home. The killer (!) drives off with them (we know because of the hook). Will there be more? Blame the budget. An alternate ending that clears up the confusing one we have watched and adds a terrifying car chase would have made the film TEN TIMES BETTER! (which doesn't say much)
All in all, this film would only be good for those of us who adore SCARY MOVIE's Anna Faris (obviously I am one, since I bought the tape and have written a nearly 800-word review). She is great here (as is nerdy but cute Erin J. Dean), though (and someone else noted this too) she seems to be the only cheerleader in the entire school. 5/10 rating.
Rounding out the cast are: Doug, the horny loser (Billy O'Sullivan), cheerleader and new-girl-in-town Jannelle (Anna Faris of SCARY MOVIE and its sequel, AND THE ONLY REASON to watch this film, especially because she shows off her natural blonde hair and yet seems intelligent), and couple Tim (Collin F. Peacock) and Cathy (Megan Victoria Hunt), who can't keep their hands off each other.
Good things: the camera work looks promising, and the pace is so-so. The story, however, is never fully developed, and the killer with the hook for a hand lacks a personality. The scrawling of "Prison food sucks" in blood found after the killer escapes from the institute (an ode to HALLOWEEN but without the suspense of the actual escape) raises a big question mark. Why did the killer brutally murder a young couple (apparently locked in an extramarital affair) on Lovers Lane thirteen years before? Although the movie has a twist ending (which is pretty confusing), this question seems rhetorical to the fact. There are only three really good, terrifying scenes, all of which involve the murder of one of the aforementioned teens: one of them, incapacitated on a kitchen table with a broken leg, is tortured by the killer with knives (and the hook, eventually); another one sits terrified on a bed, until the killer makes a surprise appearance from (where else?) underneath the bed; and, lastly, another teen meets a grisly end next to a car window.
Bad acting: none really; it's expected of a B-movie anyway. The sheriff, in the opening scene, seems like he was the worst actor in his community theater, but does an okay job for the rest of the movie. The other actors, especially Dean and Faris, are really good (playing a teenager isn't that hard), but only if you can hear them (the boom mike must've been bought secondhand or something). Overall, the film was bad. This is a horror film where the high school principal punches a drunken female student in a bowling alley, where the sheriff meets his daughter in town but doesn't seem truly concerned that a violent killer has escaped from the state institute and is headed their way, where a dimwitted deputy reholsters his weapon BEFORE examining what's behind a curtain, where it is said, in the opening scene, that the sheriff and Dr. Grefe are half-brothers, yet that fact, CRUCIAL to the storyline, is hardly ever developed! And yes, not one, not two, but THREE scenes involve animals creating suspense! (Does the dog's head count as an entire animal?)
The worst, however, is the resolution following the film's climax/revelation phase. SPOILER: The only surviving teens sit in the back of a police SUV, awaiting a ride home. The killer (!) drives off with them (we know because of the hook). Will there be more? Blame the budget. An alternate ending that clears up the confusing one we have watched and adds a terrifying car chase would have made the film TEN TIMES BETTER! (which doesn't say much)
All in all, this film would only be good for those of us who adore SCARY MOVIE's Anna Faris (obviously I am one, since I bought the tape and have written a nearly 800-word review). She is great here (as is nerdy but cute Erin J. Dean), though (and someone else noted this too) she seems to be the only cheerleader in the entire school. 5/10 rating.