Drowning Mona (2000)
3/10
Avoid This Town With A Vengeance!
20 August 2000
This film is a mess!

Imagine that late at night you drive into a small sleepy town and register in it's one motel. In the morning you wake up to the nightmare of where you're at. And for God's sake,whatever you do, don't drink the water, for there must be something in it; just look at the residents.

This film starts out with the death of the town's most hated citizen, Mona Dearly (Bette Midler). The driving question is, not who did it, but who didn't? And it seems the only person who is interested in discovering this fact is the town's sheriff (Danny DeVito,co-producer of this film).

On the surface, it would appear this film is a feeble attempt to put a new twist on the classic Hitchcock black comedy "The Trouble With Harry". If so, it most certainly does not work. The key cause of this failure is that the town's residents are totally unlikeable from every human aspect. In fact, in the end, the only character I found the slightest affinity for was the one arrested as the killer. Now, that has to tell you something.

For example, the young couple so madly in love are a mismatched pair. Not only is he (Casey Affleck) prettier than his girlfriend (Neve Campbell), but he's ten times dumber to boot.

In fact, all of the residents appear to be suffering from the ill affects of the prolonged consumption of water (or beer) polluted by toxic waste. This includes the town's police force (with the exception of the sheriff), all of whom appear to be severely mentally impaired.

As for the family of the murder victim, the husband (William Fichtner) and the son (Marcus Thomas)are poster boys for the cause of benevolent castration ; under no circumstances do you ever want either of them to reproduce.

In short, other than the occasional laugh here and there, a lot of good actors (with special reference to Jamie Lee Curtis, Midler and DeVito) were wasted in pursuit of the script that wasn't. Get out of this town as fast as you can.
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