Review of Festival

Festival (I) (2005)
1/10
Boring and Joyless
10 April 2007
Warning: Spoilers
I'm at a loss to understand the high star rating (6.3 at last count) that this film has gathered - possibly explained by the IMDb star system being manipulated by cast and crew. This is unquestionably the worst British film I've ever seen (and not in a "so bad it's good" way - it's bad, I mean Gigli bad.) The script is weak, the characters are caricatures, the pace snail-like. Good actors are fed into the maw of the mincing machine of this abominable script like world war one infantry into the teeth of German machine guns. Every time you think their talent may rise above the direction and script it tears another chunk out of their performances and leaves them flailing.

How can a film about one of the most joyful and entertaining events in the world be so joyless and unentertaining. Its arch, self-knowing attempt to weave together the "brittle" world of comedy, the "agony" of paedophile priests, the "emptiness" of wealth and motherhood, the "pure joy" of performance FAILS SO DISMALLY THAT I WANT BACK THE TWO HOURS OF MY LIFE THAT I WASTED ON THIS RUBBISH.

Be careful - this review may make you want to watch the film - it shouldn't - spend the time more productively (I'm sure your toenails need clipping). It commits the worst sin of any film (especialiy about Edinburgh). It's boring.
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