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takashi_kupo
This site has always been a double edged sword. There are so many terrible people who lurk on IMDB but sometimes, dialogue that the message boards produce can actually teach me things - entertain me - make me feel somewhat happy to discuss issues with fellow anonymous human beings. I will say one thing about all that though: I've never made a real friend on here. That's saying something as I'm as outgoing and interested in making new friends from weird places as possible.
In closing, I'd like everyone who reads this to know that I'm interested in your opinion, your story, your personality. I'd like to get to know you. If you feel like we can talk about the world or a movie, simply add me as a friend on facebook: www.facebook.com/takakupo, or follow me on tumblr: lodgekiss.tumblr.com
That's all.
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Fast & Furious 7 (2015)
Worst Movie of the Year (So Far)
I love blockbusters but I don't love this one.
Furious 7 is a sexist, racist, trite film that does not even amount to the levels of The Avengers - a film it tries very hard to be. But even as a blockbuster with hundreds of millions in funding where we might forgive the rampant presence of -isms (seems backwards, doesn't it?) to please a general audience (falsley presumed to be White, Straight, and Cis-Gendered), we find ourselves in nothing but muck.
In the first 15 minutes, we're subjected to women as props being sprayed with water with as little clothing as possible. Equal opportunity to delight straight female viewers or gay men is forgotten entirely as the objectification of the female props decorates the set. Did Vin Diesel and manage to negotiate as a producer that he could gain 20 lbs and not take off his shirt at all? Were the producers simply frat boys that don't know how to make women into 3 dimensional characters and scream "eww!" at the sign of male cleavage? Probably.
If that isn't enough, Iggy Azalea, the very symbol of White people pretending to be from the streets, makes a pointless cameo with a terrible American accent and the entire movie is a setup for a letdown right then and there.
Furious 7 delves deeper into its own chasm of stupidity by tokening its characters - good guys and bad guys. Roman is used is as the sassy black woman and Letti is turned into a practical girl from a novella ("I have to find myself, Dom!" *tears in her eyes falling to her booty shorts.) When it comes to the bad guys, you have the token Asian that knows martial arts and the token black guy that's a terrorist. Djimon Hounsou is wasted in this film.
The only characters worth their salt are Dom, who doesn't exactly evolve but does have a character arc, and Tej (played by Ludicrous) who's character is not simply a witty black man but a competent hacker with good insights.
The globe trotting film however makes a very disastrous mistake by portraying Abu Dabi infactually with women walking around in bikinis. Any individual with vague knowledge of the world knows that this is a country where women wearing a bikini is basically illegal and will get you thrown in jail or fined. A simple fact checking might have saved the film this humiliation.
But that's the essence of the film. Silly and sometimes terrible writing. Even as the film attempts to assemble a bountiful team of amazing drivers and skilled fighters, all of the one-liners fall completely flat. Take for instance Hobbe's one line to Letti during a confrontation. "Woman. I am the calvary." Maybe it was Dwayne Johnson's delivery, or maybe it was the 15th failed one liner in a row, but it was awful.
The only reason this film gets two stars out of me is the amazing tribute to Paul Walker and all the fake outs of his character's death through the film. Without it, the movie would be complete trash. Actually, it is trash, it just has a great tribute at the end which is surprisingly affective.
Sword Art Online (2012)
Kirito Faces the choice of Playing alone or Teaming up while Trapped in Virtual Reality With Thousands of Others from Around the World
One of the biggest strengths in SwordArt: Online (or SAO for short) is its basic premise: Thousands of virtual reality gamers are trapped in a video game where the stakes are too high to ignore; If you die in the game, you die in real life. There are other precautions that have been taken to make sure that those in the real world don't try and get you out manually. A microwave signal will fry your brain should you tamper with the system.
There are so many great things about SAO, like the visuals, character design, original soundtrack, and character development but it's difficult to overcome blatantly negative aspects. For instance, the fan service is extremely hard to ignore. It focuses on the fourteen year old boy's fantasy of beautiful fourteen year old girls and not much else. The female characters are readily placed in nothing but their underwear throughout the show while the male characters are there to watch. Likewise, the male characters exist to advance the plot while the female characters function as damsels in distress even though they get a chance to shine every now and then.
When you get past the show's chauvinistic tendencies though, a very rich story awaits you. We follow the journey of Kirito, a young boy who is thrust into the world of SAO with more experience than most players (he is 1 out of 1000 beta testers) but will it be enough to overcome the 100 floors that the population of SAO is being forced to conquer? Kirito meets the competent and beautiful Asuna. A swordswoman (girl, actually) who is just one of about 5 choices for Kirito to fall in love with throughout the series. She's a good choice too. When I said she was competent, it means that she is able to match Kirito in both reputation and skill during the big fights. But she does have girlish tendencies which seem out of place since she isn't a foil to Kirito or a polar opposite. Both characters are remarkably similar with Asuna being slightly more optmistic and energetic.
The rest of the characters in SAO are memorable but since the series is cut in half during the middle of season 1, and we essentially lose most of the original cast (which doesn't mean they are dead. Those who watch the show will see what I mean), we hardly get a chance to see those who we have become attached to, shine. Watching SAO beyond the first half of season 1 is like getting halfway through a delicious dinner and being forced to eat something completely different when the chef switches out the plates. The second half is extremely disappointing and wildly different and some might find this to be a turn off. It can work though.
The backgrounds, atmosphere, dialogue, story lines, and costume designs are some of the strongest an anime can have in SAO. The visuals are always gorgeous, even when the animation switches from drawn art to rendered from a computer. The boss battles are amazing and extremely believable since they are in a video game. And that's what works in SAO so well is the video game aspect.
When SAO explores the intricacies of itself (the video game I mean) the results can be enervating. When Kirito and Asuna cook their first S class meal, or Lizbeth (a blacksmith) is gathering materials for swordmaking, it's extremely interesting and enjoyable. My only gripe is how quickly these story lines go. In fact, that's my biggest gripe. The first half of the season is endearing and yet too rapid. The second half slows down way too much in a remarkable switch of gears it's like you can hear the engine grind against itself. I wish the showrunners would have made the decision to stick with the first half and not switch gears; this may have made the show a 10 out of 10 instead of a lower grade.
Mitt (2014)
This Documentary is for Political Junkies Only
This film has absolutely no crossover appeal. The whole point of it isn't to recap the last 8 years of Mitt Romney's life. It's to show the human side of him and the toll that it took on his family. It's pretty affective too at some points, like when we see how good of a wife that Ann Romney is behind the scenes, telling her husband to have conviction from his heart.
There's a few really intimate moments that you should watch out for which tug at the heart strings, but they never really quite tug in a really strong way. You won't cry, you want laugh, but you will smile. This is strictly a documentary for politicos.
One problem a cinephile might have is the really bad quality of half the shots. Some of them are extremely grainy like you're watching a youtube video. The score sucks, too. And the overall atmosphere that the film creates makes you want to fall asleep.
In conclusion, if you're not obsessed with politics, stay away. It's boring.
Jagten (2012)
A Scary Prospect: The Hunt
The Hunt lays out a very surreal scenario in which Lucas, a charismatic Kindergarten teacher, is accused of showing his private parts to one of the students. We know the whole time though that Lucas is innocent and that the accusation is not just a misunderstanding but a wildly out of control fire that is getting worse with every minute that passes. The administrator Gretthe (sounds like Greta) who first heard these accusations from the six year old Klara, leads the initial investigation in the worst way possible, putting more ideas in the girl's head than she should have, and bringing in unequipped, incompetent administrators who force even more heinous ideas into the girl's head by suggesting them in the first place and then burdening her to say yes because they believe she is forcing herself to forget.
Without spoiling everything, I can say that the ending was somewhat satisfying because the psychological turns that Lucas goes through as a character, though lacking development, is sickening and terrifying. He doesn't evolve as much as he survives the investigation and gets to a point, after all the threats against his life, where he stares down his antagonists. It's worth watching to see just if he survives all the angry parents.
One of the central strengths of the movie is the believability of the mob mentality, and it most certainly is believable here. But the one, single most frustrating aspect of the film is Lucas's inability to deny anything. He never once says, "I didn't do this!" Or "I couldn't do this!" It's amazingly irritating because all it shows us is how fantastically fragile his ego is. Not even during the first confrontation does Lucas tell Gretthe that he didn't do it. He shows little worry over the truthfulness and looks guilty. It's scary. I would believe he did it just by that alone if I weren't the viewer!
But there are so many other great aspects like the acting. Madds Mikkelson is devastating. The actors who play his son, Marcus, and his accuser, Klara, are phenomenal. The characters themselves are somewhat typical, but they show complexity when necessary. Klara for instance is a girl in a neglectful home; someone who isn't in the best environment (and that's the reason all this happens), but she shows us the innocent yet unexpectedly evil part of being a kid, exploited by adults (namely Gretthe who thinks that children don't lie).
The film moves tenderly, uncomfortably, and at times, suspensefully, through the tough subject matter of adult-child relations and how that is corrupted. If you want to see a great film this year, you can't go wrong with The Hunt, but there are definitely better films.
The Giant Mechanical Man (2012)
Mechanical and Lacking Charm
The cast is great but the script leaves a lot to be desired. It's definitely got that independent vibe going on and unfortunately, it seems like it needed the helping hand of a few big wig studio rewrites. I felt pretty bored while watching several expository scenes (though the key scenes between the leads were pretty sweet).
I found the attitude of Janice's sister, Jill, pretty annoying. It's like whoever wrote this movie doesn't acknowledge the awkward people in life. I suppose that might be realistic to some, but I don't find it realistic at all.
If you have a stack of movies that you're waiting to watch, The Giant Mechanical Man should be somewhere near the bottom. Or something you play for background noise. Try it out if you love the actors, but otherwise, there are quirkier movies that do material like this much better.
Goats (2012)
Not a Worthy Drama
There is not much to like about the film except for the actors. Vera Farmiga shows us why she's an Academy Award nominee, stealing every scene she's in. David Duchovony has a sexy bod. The guy from Weeds plays the guy from Weeds. And Graham Philips? I'd rather he had a better vehicle to showcase his talent, but I suppose we all have to start somewhere.
The premise of the film, if a solid one can be written, isn't very solid. A young boy under the tutelage of a wise man named Javier, AKA the Goat Man, gets a chance to leave the comfort of his dysfunctional home and be a normal student at a prep school. He meets a bunch of non-sensical young men in the process, none of which are charming, endearing, or compelling characters at all. He gets drunk with some, high with the others, and he spends his time learning nothing but showing us how great of an academic he is (saying in one scene that he's getting all A's even though there's no evidence to say that he's extremely studied or intelligent).
Boy meets girl, girl is charming, but that storyline is pointless too. We meet the young boy's father played by Ty Burrel, and his father's new wife, played by the sensational Keri Russel. The father is a douche and the new wife is way too nice to understandably be in love with the douche father. The father's character arc is supposedly wrapped up at the end when he comes to visit the boy and helps him retrieve a stolen item, but it's another unbelievable arc in a series of subplots that the film throws at us expecting us to believe.
The movie goes on a bit aimlessly, never ceasing to grant us boring turns and twists that neither endear us or provoke meaningful thought. One last issue I would take with the film is the all white cast. Like other independent titles, one would think that this film would showcase a more broad spectrum of the locations that the film portrays. But like other independent titles to fall into the same trap, Goats can't imagine even the darker skin of an extra clouding up the already murky plot of final product.
Top of the Lake (2013)
Powerful Slowburn that Never Boils Over
Top of the Lake is a mini series for the ages. It is one of those stories that can only be told in a mini series because it's too long of a story for a feature length film, and too short of a story for a full fledged series. The characters that inhabit Paradise, the beautiful lake town backdrop of this New Zealand set crime drama, are perfectly suited to the seven episode arch.
The hook of the story starts with Tui, the 12 year old girl who tries to kill herself in the titular lake. The weather is mentioned as hazardous throughout the series, but we see the dangers expressed right away when Tui is spotted and taken to school to be looked at. That's where the story gets rolling because we find out that the young girl is pregnant and some kind of foul play as afoot. When we are introduced to the series's protagonist, Robin, we get an interrogation which nabs the intrigue: Who is responsible for bearing this child? "No one." Top of the Lake really draws out the main crime until the very end. Meanwhile, plenty of subplots are stewing, like Robin's relationship with her cancer stricken mother, or Matt, the small town's drug kingpin and his relationship with his multiple sons, including Robin's part-time lover, Johnno. There's the on-again, off-again relationship and work status between Robin and her boss, Sergeant-Detective Al (a shady but seemingly upstanding character). And then there's Jaime, the bleach blonde and often mute best friend of Tui who may or may not be the father of her unborn child. These characters go to great lengths to stay connected and travel vast distances to find themselves either torn apart or that they belong with one another. Each revelation in their relationship, or where they end up, is heartbreaking. Because of the human aspect, and the expected loss of life from some characters, the stakes are always very high, and the sentiment is extremely awe-inspiring.
This doesn't account for the acting. The talent presented here is acclaim, especially Elisabeth Moss who won the Golden Globe for her performance as Robin. But the rest of the cast is an ensemble that deserves much more praise and attention. There isn't a single misstep from these actors. Everyone is competent and plays their part to the tee.
If you are a fan of mystery, you're going to love this piece as the unraveling keeps going until the end, and even then, you find yourself debating what the facts are and how all the dust settled. The final reveal is both satisfying but leaves you wanting more.
I would recommend this series to anyone who loves fine television.
American Hustle (2013)
American Tussle
I expected so much from this movie, and did it deliver? Well, let's see: It has an amazing ensemble cast. Each with their Oscar statues or Oscar nominations. Those cast members each turn in a good to great performance (if the script was there for them). The costumes are fabulous, the set pieces are good, and the cinematography is great. But throughout the film there are things missing. And not just little things that you can't put your finger on. There are big, tremendous, Jennifer Lawrence head banging to "Live and Let Die" things missing.
For starters, the director's choice to start the movie off with a scene from somewhere near the middle is just confusing. The only thing that we learn from that scene is that Irving (Christian Bale) is a balding fatty who is pretty good at covering up his hair. And honestly, it's confusing, because Edith (Amy Adams) has an accent that disappears and reappears about five times during the first fifteen minutes till she narrates to us that she's actually an American. We don't find out why she has an English accent until that fifteen minute mark, and honestly, I'm still trying to answer the question of whether it's worth the first fifteen minutes of confusion.
But unsettling editing choices aside, the script itself is just generic. I don't' want to bore you with all the details of movies that have done these particular cons better so I will cut to the chase: We have a con artist movie which is really about the characters. But without a tightly sewn plot, and endearing character development, those characters are meaningless. Sure they are acted very well, but the only person who actually goes through any meaningful change is Rosalynd (Jennifer Lawrence). Her epiphany that it's okay to break the family tradition is satisfactory for the story because she learns something and she changes. And literally, she is the only person in the film to ponder whether she can change and thinks it's tough while on the other hand, you have someone like Irving and Edith who are just trying so dearly to keep the lives they have that when they do change, you just don't believe it.
There's a scene at the end that really takes the cake too. One that proves this movie need about six more months worth of rewrites and planning before it went ahead with production. Irving finally comes to his senses and has to confess to the only friend that he's ever made that he has lied to that friend and will make said friend go to jail for a long time. What transpires though is a phony and outrageous schtick of a scene followed by a monologue where Irving confesses, "I will regret losing that friendship for the rest of my life." Never really contemplating that the friendship he had was based entirely on lies and that it was a set-up from the beginning. That not once, was any real action Irving took, with the exception of his confession, in the best interest of their "friendship".
The script was completely hackneyed, overwrought with clichés and tropes, and terribly reminiscent of better con movies from the past. The only saving grace of the film which puts us at 7 stars (and which might change in the future if I re-watch it) is the performance of Amy Adams and Christian Bale. Jennifer Lawrence is a star here too, but her choice to use a New Jersey accent, then drop that accent during every scene, is terrible. Bale really does the best with what he has and is always reliable when it comes to transforming his entire body for a role (I love that he commits to being an overweight, balding con artist). And Adams finally shows us what she's worth in a leading role, convincing us that she comes from where she says she comes, and that she doesn't want to be the person she started out in life being. Her emotions are so genuine throughout and it's easy to get caught up in hurricane at any moment.
So, watch Hustle if you dare. But don't go in with high expectations because that will just hurt you for the two hours that you watch it.
An American Crime (2007)
Middle of the Road and Repressed
I had no idea about this case before I saw the movie, so I wasn't sure where the plot was going. Watching An American Crime for the first time though, you start to see that there are problems with how the movie plays out and the various choices the director makes in place of opportunities to actually say something new or wildly meaningful throughout the film. Take for example the various children that Gertrude, the abusive mother and happenstance caretaker of little Sylvia and Jenny Likens, has at her disposal. Not only do her children imitate her, but the neighborhood kids are in on it too, torturing the victim in a dysfunctional two hours without ever seeming to be supsensful or terrifying.
That theme of middling emotion rides the movie from beginning to end. At the opening, we hear a voice over from Ellen Page that has little to nothing to do with what actually occurs in the film and has no real impact on the viewers. When it closes, and Page gives her final voice over, it's an even more confusing script because she says something so baffling that you will need to watch it several times to understand that the line is meaningless: "She sacrificed me to protect her children, then she sacrificed her children to protect herself." Many who have watched the movie may disagree with the meaning of that line, but that's only because they've made assumptions or they've gone out and researched why Gertrude was so insane. The movie never prescribes a reason to the line, never even comes upon the insanity that is Gertrudes torture and scripture and cleansing regimen against Sylvia Likens. And that's one of the worst problems that the film has: The torture scenes are best described montages, or small clips. The director chooses to show us long shots of Gertrude or Ricky, staring into space as if possessed, but there is no meaning behind any of this. What torture scenes are shown are rudely cut short for unknown reasons. One quick look at the Wikipedia article and we see that Gertrude was even more brazen in her punishments, and did them more often than what is shown in the film. She throw scalding water onto Sylvia, rubbed salt in her burns, read endless scripture, left her naked most of the time, starved her and deprived the girl of water. She even made Sylvia eat her own feces, not just once but several times, and she forced the kids around her to help, too.
The film depicts the kids as having a heart, being human, two faced, and in some scenes, innocent bystanders. The only reprieve we actually get from this notion is during a fake-out when Sylvia thinks she's being rescued. This is the saving grace of the film. The twist at the end is surprisingly graceful if not lacking in cinematics.
Also the high points of the film are the actors. Catherine Keener, Evan Peters, and Ellen Page do a great job with what they have. Page is especially good in her role as Sylvia Likens and gives more to it than anyone else. Keener is restricted to her own dialogue and unfortunately to whatever mood the director was trying to capture.
All in all, the movie isn't essential cinema, nor is it worthy of spreading any kind of message, because it doesn't have any. It's just a movie. If you have two hours to spare and feel like watching something about happenstance, wrong place, wrong time, child abuse, put it on. Or if you're a fan of Ellen Page and Catherine Keener, and you don't have any of their other films to watch, take a chance on this one. It might entertain you for a little while.
12 Years a Slave (2013)
The Best of 2013's Crop
2013 will be remembered cinematically for one of the strongest years in movie history. Not because it had one atomic offering, but because it had several films that were exceptional. Chief among them is 12 Years a Slave.
Following the journey of a free black man in the new world, Solomon Northrup is an intelligent, humble being played brilliantly by Chiwetel Ejiofor. The first half of the movie cuts back and forth between Solomon's life as a free man and his journey as an unlawfully captured slave. The contrast is damning as Solomon does his best to be a good husband and father while the next moment we see him in the throws of a sugar cane field, or cotton field in the next frame. What Ejiofor brings to the role of Solomon is not just a strong man, but a man who is apologetic and seemingly frail during his moments of freedom, but steely and malleable when he needs to survive. Every inch of his body is changed at some point in the film, whether it be from a learned fiddle player from the north, or to the violently beaten man who had just been whipped in the South. Even during times of great distress and fear like when he passes through a live lynching and must expose his owner's tags to a group of rednecks in the woods, the immense perspiration on his face and tremble in his hands are key to Ejiofor's exceptional performance.
The other actors who are given enough lines stand out tremendously too. Sarah Paulson as the mistress and terrifying wife of Master Epps, shines as the villainess who terrorizes the most beautiful conquest of the Epps estate, Patsey. The better half of the Epps household is Michael Fassbender's Edwin Epps, known to the locals as "The Slave Breaker". His excruciating punishments, biblical defenses for tyranny over his slaves, and insane personage rocks the screen every time he appears. His sick need to conquer Patsey is only succeeded by his harassment of the newest slave, Solomon. Epps fears nothing more than a learned slave and awaits any chance he can get to put Solomon down.
Lastly, there is Patsey herself. Every shriek, tear, and gulp, down to the very plea she makes for her life is burned into your mind as the movie goes on. Lupita Nyong'O deserves all the awards she gets for this one. As do Fassbender and Ejiofor. If these three cleaned up their respective acting categories on Oscar night, it will be a well earned victory for each one of them.
Steve McQueen, the director, does wonders in his role. Many of the films most brilliant moments come during the extended shots, though some tend not to make sense, hence the missing star. But for those that do work, they are agonizing. Solomon's hanging near death while the other slaves go about their day, and the kids play behind him takes us back to those days in a visceral and evocative way. McQueen's propensity to show us a myriad of characters all at once also suits the movies monstrously unprivate atmosphere. Slaves are bundled into houses that nearly don't fit them, and one scene in particular, where a female slave uses Solomon to orgasm then turns over and begins to weep is powerful because you realize that not even the basic need of sexual fulfillment can be enjoyed as they are all doomed to these public quarters where the fellow property resides.
12 Years a Slave is powerful. It is a slow burn to fruition as Solomon finds himself near the end, not a slave who awaits his freedom any longer or a slave who has given up hope. He finds himself in the death of an old man and realizes that he is strong, using his voice and a group song during the funeral of this old man to announce how powerful he is in the shackles of unjustice. Though ultimately fate has a different ending for him, "Roll, Johnnie roll," announces his full body armor has been constructed and his spirit cannot be obstructed. I highly recommend this movie to anyone that is worth their salt in cinema enthusiasm, and I hope that it is one day shown as mandatory education.
Into the Wild (2007)
Into The ...Camera?
At first, I suffered the delusion that the main character was an annoying go getter who worried too much about people being selfish and materialistic. But little does the audience know, Sean Penn is just an A-hole and likes to shove family drama in your face till you're drenched in tears. However long it takes you to get over the fact that the movie has a message and that if you're one of those people to judge the character by his actions only, and not the lesson to be learned in the end, then just leave the movie theater and don't look back. Honestly, this film is what film makers should look forward to conceiving and retiring from.
Although Emile Hirch doesn't put together an Oscar worthy performance, one that will turn heads like Cate Blanchett's winded and terrific Elizabeth, or Benicio Del Torro's addict antics, he sustains character throughout and gives a performance that is memorable in the fact that as the man he plays grows, you see him grow as well. And speaking of the character, he's straightforward but still very intriguing. Alexander Supertramp otherwise known as Alex Maccendless, needed an escape from his home sweet home, for reasons that seem to be on the surface, but are actually revealed to be deeper in the end.
The people around him, the people he meets and loves and changes are so real and a-typical, that the actors seem lost in some kind of delusion that they may actually be a hippie, or a man that just got busted for watching illegal satellite television. I'd go on but I woudn't want to spoil any kind of archetype you may be waiting for.
The movie, with it's much needed and refreshing meaningful shots of our protagonists point of view expressed through heavy nature watching and blunt nudity, is something that you do not see in cinema anymore, unless it's done badly by an indie or art director trying to be angst. It feels as if this movie leaps ahead of its budget and production and attempts to send you it's final message, revealed in its final chapter, as an actual morally defined and virtuous one. Though a big deal that Penn made with the main character was that he looked into the camera a lot which i fond strange, but oddly balanced at the same time. And I mean balanced as in the fact that it may have taken itself a little seriously at times, but it did loss en up a bit, god bold, and the fourth wall, though still broken, gave a realness to the character.
Though the ending will leave you feeling sore and some numb, you will eventually come around to learn that the lesson that must be learned, must be lived first, and if it takes a cast like this to express it on film, then by damn, let it be learned and expressed.
"True Happiness can only be achieved when you have someone to share it with."
30 Days of Night (2007)
The Snow Plow Hero's Blues
From underdeveloped characters, to choppy editing, to some bad lines, it's got a lot going wrong. But however bad that may sound, somehow, the movie still remains to be alluring. The vampires have a certain charm to them, even when looking disgusting and disturbing/creepy. Though their feeding frenzy and torture route may make them a bit unlikable, you have about an hour to deal with them and find either things you like, or dislike. It's a good movie overall, the more minor characters being a bit more desirable then Hartnett or George at times, but that's only because they were given a bad script to work with. Their acting is on par, but Ben Foster, he deserves an early career Oscar nomination for his portrayal of the stranger. A self deluded martyr to the vampires. A lap dog if you will.
The best part about the movie, unmistakably is the gore and the way they go about showing it off here and there. The best part about it is they play with it. A splatter of blood here, trail of blood there, chop a head off every - let's say fifteen minutes, and then we'll just go WILD EVERY HALF HOUR! And then blood just starts flying. A favorite is probably going to be the vampires vs. the snow plow, which you will see in the future.
Now the problems start occurring when Eben (Hartnett) gets back from finding one of the town mates decapitated. Although everyone puts on a great show, the mortal danger just never seems real. It feels like you know who's next every single time, and with so many people to kill, it's a wonder they didn't just use a bomb, WAIT! It's a vampire movie. They need the blood. But they do break some things and set it all on fire in the end to cover up their tracks.
It's a warm hearted movie in a cold place, where the end lacks a good beat down, but we still get to watch the sunrise together. See it if you have the time, but there is no rush here. Unless you're running...
Resident Evil: Extinction (2007)
Strummin' My Pain With His Finger
Resident Evil has never failed to surprise. It's a charm that Anderson has the ability, not to control skillfully, but inanely and luckily write into each of his screenplays. The funny thing about Extinction though, is that out of all the bad rap that it got before coming out, first reviews, and release of tons of footage from the hour and a half plus film, it really wasn't bad.
Granted the acting in this one wasn't as dramatic and gripping as the first two, not that it was Oscar worthy, but it always gets the job done. Though I must note that Mike Epps does awful in his first few scenes. Especially when screaming out in remorse for his other not so lucky co-star Ashanti as she perks up against the bus door, dying vigilantly. Milla, while still believable as an action heroine, was a bit disappointing with her usual opening dialog (in this case a narrative which seemed very amateur). Fortunately enough, this can all be blamed upon the script and the directing. Surprisingly enough though, Ali Larter in the second and third act filled her role nicely and Oded Fehr actually, as annoying as he was in Apocalypse, stole the show in this one as the straight guy who has the hots for Alice (but) not really cause the world is ending.
The story is simple as usual, Alice has super powers because of Umbrella, she finds her old buddies and makes new friends and gets to protect them with some high kicks and nice knives. This time though, she can jump higher, move faster, and throw people around with her mind. She's finds a journal that says Alaska = freedom, and hey, why not take the convoy with her. So off they go. Little does she know, Umbrella is tracking her now, and they are out for blood, quite literally. So some stuff goes down in Vegas and Alice ends up going up against the man who programmed her to make her eyes flash pretty logos and well, things don't get anymore interesting.
The funny thing about this installment is it isn't a character piece, and it isn't a very complex story either, yet people gripe about these aspects not fulfilling any kind of sophistication. My question is, do you really need all of this? The world is coming to an end people, all you need to know is my name and whether or not I can help you. Said rules apply to Extinction, and well to the entire series. But mostly to Extinction. That being said, you can go get your character development when Oscar season comes around. For now, enjoy this film, for in twenty years, the series will be a cult classic. Why? Because it's successful. How is it successful? 100Mil around he world for each one, and this installment is on the same track. When a bad film like this sells, it's one of those movies that you look back on in about thirteen years and get all nostalgic about, "Gawd, I really liked that movie. You remember when (insert scene)." And so on.
I really liked the fact that they played down the fact that they made Alice superhuman. "Like, hey guys, I have something to tell you *kills LJ with flying rock* I totally have superpowers, but shh, don't tell anyone cause i don't really care." The crow scene where Ashanti sacrifices herself and her giant afro that comes out of nowhere (you'll see) and Alice comes to save the day, sent chills down my spine. It was the first movie in years that's been able to do that. I sat in the theater every time she did something, well, cool, going, "YES! KILL EM'! SHANK THE HO!" No doubt, people will talk about the rip offs and whatever about her being Jean Grey and Day of the Dead being the classic, and blah blah blah, but it doesn't really matter. Because RE: Extinction is entertaining. It delivers eye candy and enough substance to at least keep people paying money for their dues.
My favorite scene was the showdown between the convoy and the super zombies in Vegas. There was bloodshed and emotion raving throughout the battlefield. It was actually an all out war, and the execution of this scene is critical to the movie's success. The special effects were good enough, and the death scenes were the dramatic kind of things you like to do if you're an actor having fun with acting. The heroes in this scene are no doubt at their peak of interest and showing off their skills. I loved the fact that one second you can be making head shots, and the next you slip up once and can't seem to get back into the groove of things.
The best part about this movie was the end at which point Alice meets the white Queen, a sister system of the Red Queen (if you're familiar with the first film) and as she exchanged dialog with her you seem to absorb this confidence that she has now. At this point, she is sent to the lower levels of the lab to defeat said spoken foe and it's here where I felt like the 'video game adaptation' finally kicked in because it felt as if she were going in to face off with the final boss. And it was nothing short of a cinematic boss battle.
At the end, the final showdown, although it lacks a bit of punch that you would think a third and supposedly final installment would want and have, it doesn't fall flat entirely, instead, it picks itself up and is actually a believable battle between good and evil. it's a nice way to see Jovovich go before she enters motherhood, and though it isn't the Oscar material everyone needs, it's the next best thing. The last summer pick you see even though school has already started;)
Halloween (2007)
Halloween Has Never Been So Old and Lazy
Rob Zombie has some making up to do after writing and directing this piece of barely professional work.
First of all, if you have any attachment to the first one than you're going to have nothing but contempt for this film. Secondly, if you are at all passive about horror films and their debauchery upon realism, and non-sensible logic, ...then you will still be unforgiving to this movie.
I'll point out the good things in this movie first. It's a very small list so we should get through it quite quickly.
-The soundtrack is awesome. The rock and roll anthems and chimes are well placed through out the film and make for some interesting scenes, especially coming up to the point where Michael actually kills his stand in father, and sister, her boyfriend, and his mother's stripper scene (Sherry Moon Zombie OWNS in this scene...and let me tell you...I'm pretty gay, and that was pretty hot.) -Sherry Moon Zombie: Although you could debate that she needs some acting lessons, I would debate that she just needs better direction in a movie, because she plays her characters well (even if we have seen it in previous Zombie movies). She was the best thing about the first half, save for the boy who played Michael. -The Cast was a good ensemble. ..enough said.
Now let's speak of the bad things in this movie. - Michael is unbelievably sadistic. No one will believe why he is so undeniably evil, because they don't have a proper back story. The opening scene is a butchered convoluted mess of yelling parents, UN-loving siblings, and hurting animals for who knows what reason. Also, when he kills his first victim, it's not very believable the way they pulled it off. - Dr. Loomis was a hooker. Terrence Stamp needs a kick in the balls for doing so badly as the new Doc. - The score is awful in placing of such is what made it so unbearable. Zombie was criticized for using Carpenter's old score too much and said himself that they would use it as little as possible, but I counted four times that they used it and not once was I satisfied with hearing it on screen. - The Screenplay was horrendous and suffered from bad one liners, to realistic dialog, to bad horror clichés, to badly delivered monologues. - It wasn't scary. Period. I jumped once but that's because I was texting my friend the whole time about how much it sucked.
All in all, it was just a total let down with the trailer being so nicely done. But being based off of a classic it sets itself up for even more of a crash and burn effect. The first half's let down was the story that should have set up the myth a lot better. It had the actors, just lacked the direction. The screenplay was awful here as well, but the saving grace was Love Hurts to Sherry Moon Zombie Stripping at her club. The second part suffered from bad everything. The actors held together well though. That's pretty much all.
See it if you like, to satisfy yourself. I mean, horror fans are bound to creep in for Halloween and Zombie, but I just felt he either you take him as an unprofessional who needs to go back to studying, or he took the project too lightly, got arrogant and lazy, and set this burning pile of poop with nice actors on fire.
- Just Sayin'