Sleuth (2007)
Jude Law: Milo Tindle
Photos
Quotes
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Milo Tindle : Maggie never told me you were... such a manipulator. She told me you were no good in bed, but she never told me you were such a manipulator.
Andrew Wyke : She told you I was no good in bed?
Milo Tindle : Oh, yes.
Andrew Wyke : She was joking. I'm wonderful in bed.
Milo Tindle : I must tell her.
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Andrew Wyke : I understand you're fucking my wife.
Milo Tindle : That's right.
Andrew Wyke : Right... Yes, right. So, we've cleared that up.
Milo Tindle : We have.
Andrew Wyke : I thought you might have denied it.
Milo Tindle : Why would I deny it?
Andrew Wyke : Well, she is my wife.
Milo Tindle : Yes, but she's fucking me.
Andrew Wyke : Oh, she's fucking you too, huh? Well, I'll be buggered. Ha ha. Sorry.
Milo Tindle : Yes, it's mutual.
Andrew Wyke : You take turns?
Milo Tindle : We fuck each other. That's what people do.
Andrew Wyke : Yeah, yeah, yeah. I follow.
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Andrew Wyke : What sort of parts do you play?
Milo Tindle : Killers, mostly. Sex maniacs, perverts.
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Milo Tindle : Where's the ladder?
Andrew Wyke : What ladder?
Milo Tindle : The ladder! Where's it gone?
Andrew Wyke : It's not working. There was always a dodgy fuse on this. I'll phone the electrician in the morning.
Milo Tindle : In the morning? What about now?
Andrew Wyke : No, no, he'll be in bed. You know these country people, early to bed, early to rise. He's a nice chap, though. He's called Norman. Charming wife, Debbie. Three delightful kids. Oh, I just remembered. He's on vacation, he's taken the kids to Bermuda.
Milo Tindle : What? So I'm stuck up here for the rest of my life?
Andrew Wyke : Have patience. Stoicism is what's called for. Works wonders.
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Milo Tindle : I'm so glad you like my mind. Not many people like my mind. Quite a few people like my body... but i can't think of anyone who likes my mind.
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[on Milo being an actor]
Andrew Wyke : Why have I never heard of you?
Milo Tindle : You will before long.
Andrew Wyke : Really?
Milo Tindle : In spades.
Andrew Wyke : That sounds threatening.
Milo Tindle : Does it?
Andrew Wyke : Doesn't it?
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Milo Tindle : What's it all about?
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Milo Tindle : You speak Dutch yourself, do you?
Andrew Wyke : Yes, how did you know? I have a Dutch uncle.
Milo Tindle : Can't see any Italian translations.
Andrew Wyke : [Implying a double entendre] No, they're a funny lot, the Italians. Culture isn't really their thing.
Milo Tindle : Their salami's good though.
Andrew Wyke : Oh, is it?
Milo Tindle : Italian salami? Best in the world.
Andrew Wyke : Did you bring any with you?
Milo Tindle : No, I left it at home.
Andrew Wyke : Oh, shame.
Milo Tindle : We're gonna have if for supper tonight, with a couple of bottles of Valpolicella.
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Milo Tindle : If you think you're broke now, you'll be ten times broker by the time she's finished with you. She'll have your guts for garters.
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Andrew Wyke : What's your background?
Milo Tindle : Me? Irish. Connemara. Spanish descent, by way of Uganda. My grandparents were slaves. My morther was a dark-eyed dusky beauty.
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Andrew Wyke : How did she describe him?
Milo Tindle : Remote. Cold. Malevolent. Spiteful. Arrogant. Ruthless. Jealous. Paranoid. Criminal tendencies. Mentally unsound.
Andrew Wyke : That's me, all right.
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Andrew Wyke : Why should I give her a divorce if you're both walking away with 88 pounds?
Milo Tindle : She wants a legal settlement. She wants part of your estate.
Milo Tindle : Never trust in legal justice. You know what legal justice is? It's farting "Annie Laurie" through a keyhole.
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[first lines]
Andrew Wyke : Yes?
Milo Tindle : Andrew Wyke?
Andrew Wyke : That's right.
Milo Tindle : I'm Milo Tindle.