Boston Legal (2004–2008)
Brandon Molale: Mike
Quotes
-
Alan Shore : [to Tara] Hello, I'm a complete stranger and I'm here to pick you up.
[notices Joe]
Alan Shore : Oh, I see, there's two of us. I'll be evens, you be odds.
Joe : You got a problem?
Alan Shore : No, actually. I just saw this fair maiden here talking to a tree trunk, and since I'm an arborist I thought I could help translate.
Joe : Here's a health tip. Walk away.
Alan Shore : Why would I do that?
Tara Wilson : All right, guys.
Alan Shore : Don't be deceived by my cushy appearance.
Tara Wilson : Excuse me. I actually am with him.
Joe : I don't care. Walk away, or I lay you out.
Alan Shore : I don't mean to be a stickler, but isn't the object to lay her out?
[Joe punches Alan]
Tara Wilson : Hey!
Joe : Oh, gee, I'm sorry, I was reaching for my wallet...
Alan Shore : I see. Allow me to reach for mine.
[walks away to the other end of the bar]
Tara Wilson : Are you all right?
Alan Shore : Fine.
[to Mike and friends]
Alan Shore : Hello, big people. Sorry to intrude, but you seem rather strapping. Here's three hundred dollars. Would you be so kind as to go hit that man down there?
Mike : [laughs incredulously] Really?
Tara Wilson : Alan!
Alan Shore : There's an extra hundred if he goes down.
Mike : You're on.
Alan Shore : Make it a good one.
Tara Wilson : Oh, for God's sakes.
Alan Shore : [Mike hits Joe; fistfight ensues. Alan gives money to Mike's friend] Here's a hundred; go help your friend.
Alan Shore : [watches the fighting] Gee, seems Joe has buddies.
[passing out money to Mike's friends]
Alan Shore : One for you, one for you. I've got plenty of them. Hit him hard, now. For you, and for you...