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Shrek (2001)
The only movie that needs to exist
You will find every single genre in Shrek. Sci-fi, Fairy tale, comedy, romance, and more. No matter what you like, you will love this movie. Everyone loves this movie. You see, it brings people together. Truly heartwarming. This is the best movie of all time. Since seeing this I haven't watched anything else but this 5 times a day. If you don't like Shrek, you have nothing to live for. Shrek is love, Shrek is life <3
(fun fact: Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead
Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
So much to do, so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets?
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow
Hey now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play
Hey now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold
It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now, wait till you get older
But the meteor men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture
The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The water's getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire, how about yours?
That's the way I like it and I never get bored
Hey now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play
Hey now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid
All that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold
Hey now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play
Hey now, you're a rock star, get the show, on get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars
Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas?
I need to get myself away from this place
I said yep what a concept
I could use a little fuel myself
And we could all use a little change
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
So much to do, so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets?
You'll never know if you don't go (go!)
You'll never shine if you don't glow
Hey now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play
Hey now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold)
Funny You Should Ask (2017)
no, just... no
This is a sad excuse for comedic show. At most, you get a dad joke/pun that makes you think "oh that's witty, I guess" The host is pretty annoying. When Jackie is on the show he repeatedly shouts "JAH-KAY" and its so unfunny it feels like I'm watching a "comedy" video from Instagram. I can almost guarantee you the audience is paid to laugh, which is probably why the prize money is so small. The budget for the show is so low that when the loser leaves, they leave with NOTHING. Well actually that's not true; the loser leaves with embarrassment for being on such a bad show. I'm just going to list a bunch of things that show how low-budget this show is:
1) There is no inspiration or or effort put into the stage where the show takes place. *not enough money for a good setup*
2) The "smash hit line of comics" are just a bunch of old people that used to be in sitcoms and don't know the first thing about making people laugh. (sitcoms, as in unfunny, boring shows where 24% of the episode is taken up by laugh tracks placed at what are considered to be "jokes" I guess.) *not enough money to hire actually funny people*
3) Loser gets nothing *not enough money to even pay for their hotel*
4) The big prize money is only 5 grand. (Host announces it like it is a new car/$50,000.) *not enough money to give out anything worth going for*
5) They literally use the horrible song "Happy" from that horrible artist Pharrell Williams, from that horrible movie Despicable Me 2, from that horrible entertainment company Illumination. *not enough money to hire a composer that will make the theme memorable and not make you want to pluck out your eardrums*
Anyway, let me complain some more. Every time the comics tell a "funny" answer, everyone in the audience, the host, the contestants,and the comics laugh like they just heard the most hilarious thing in the world. (personally I have a theory that the more they laugh, the more they get paid. It's really the only reasonable explanation.)
Recap of why much I despise this show:
1) Not funny
2) Bad host
3) Loser leaves with nothing
4) Low-budget
5) Everyone laughs too much for it to be natural.
Never watch this. You are welcome for the warning :D