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Mea Culpa (2024)
Predictable, poor script, almost frustrating to watch
It starts well, but you quickly realize it's not a multilayer criminal with riddles and plot twist. The movie is obvious and cheap to a degree that is almost surprising.
The whole idea is not very convincing, characters simple, things happen out of nowhere without making much sense.
On the good side, it's nicely produced, recorded, good soundtrack, scenography. Actors do the job. None is the Oscar role, but hard to be picky about their performance. My biggest complaint would be that they have agreed to take part in this production after reading the script.
I wish I have checked the notes before watching and spare 2h of time.
Sexify (2021)
Disappointing, inconsistent, unconvincing, not even educational.
Sexify clearly tries to ride the same cart as the 'Sex Education', but contrary to the predecssor it is neither cute, nor convincing, nor actually educational.
The main story is forced and more often than not illogical. Obvious doubts are rather ignored than answered and I found it rather annoying. The technological aspect is just disturbing. It's a shame, cause the general idea is cool and the story line is usually the strong side of the polish movies. I believe with only minor changes and expert consultations it could be easily improved. But in the way it was executed: the whole app, the research, sounds cheap and it just doesn't make any sense..
On the educational side, it shows the transformation of 3, very different, characters, how they change mindsets and get out of their comfort zones - this addresses multiple stereotypes and surely can make some people think, great. But there is really not much more than it. In 8h you'll hear hundred of times that the female orgasm is important and is a goal on its own, but not much stands by it. The 2 out of 3 characters won't even experience it. On top of that the idea that there is an algorithm to the orgasm and that the app can auto-magically create it is somehow scary, and doesn't feel like the right message... So yes, it brings attention to the existence of the female orgasm, but that is as far as it goes, before it leaps backwards...
On the positive side, the characters are well built and well played, the side stories are quite realistic and the situations are often hillarious and funny. The supporting actors are among the polish best and did great job at making it more relaxing and funny. Finally, the soundtrack is an actual masterpiece, chapeau bas!
Overall, I feel very disappointed, that such a good idea was poorly executed, even though great actors were involved. With a better director it could have been 8 or 9, but in this form it's rather disturbing than pleasing to watch.
Fifty Shades Freed (2018)
Not even up to Fifty Shades of Grey expecttations
Previous episodes have at least delivered for those expecting bdsm inspiration and erotics. This part is just purely naive, cheap and predictable. Forced drama, doubtful romantics and laughable criminal aspects.
365 dni (2020)
Primitive and poorly played 50 Shades of Grey
I might not be in the target group, but I really wanted the movie to work well, as we rarely see Polish productions hit international markets.
There is not much to praise in 365 Days... or well, nothing. The main actress is pretty and Massimo has good 6-pack, but that's pretty much it. The story line, dialogues and actor skills fit into mid-range porn movies. But, at the same time there is barely any porn in it. Some boobs poping out here and there and minor sex scenes, nothing unusual or explicit.
There are scenes where the director clearly wanted to show elements of teasing, seduction or drama... but neither the actors just stood up to the task nor are those scenes believable or consistent.
And then there is the ending. Terrible, inconvincing, naive and predictable. But not many of you will get there anyway, so don't worry.
NOTE: I was able to get through only the first 40min of the movie, and then fast forwarded the rest. I don't think many people will find strength to go through all of it.
Girls Trip (2017)
Disappointed, even if you already know it's a cheap comedy
There is no plot whatsoever. Just a story fully predictable from the minute 1. of the movie.
There is for sure a lot of 'humor'. Just that it is not funny, often shameful.
It's like a poor sequel of American Pie mixed up with the Hangover, just in a female, afro-american version and done with no style or consistency.
Still if you want to make sure that the friendship and love always wins, and you love cheap sex/drunk related humor - you can give it a try.
Avengers: Infinity War (2018)
Disturbing experience.
I am not a comics specialist and unlike most of the others I have no emotional connection to any of the hereos... so I might be biased.
I have never expected much of a story line or intrigue from a movie solely based on the heroes presence, but being recommended as a revolutionary and number one of the series I hoped for at least a bit of cheap humor and great pictures.
Yet, in the movie I've laughed twice, first time when Thor called raccoon a rabbit, and second time... when he did it again. The ending is surprising, especially for an American movie, but besides this the movie neither offers scenography comparable with Star Wars or Avatar nor any unique special effects.
There is no consistency in action, power distribution or whatsoever. One minute the same character can die from a fist hit, the other he survives an explosion of the whole planet. Once he travels the space barefoot, the other he dies from being sucked from the ship. The colorful light goes back and forth but the evil character doesnt use any of his powers most of the time just to prolong the boring fights.
Watching this movie is just distubring and frustrating.
Okja (2017)
Bizarre, quasi-funny, fully predictable
It's one of these movies that you watch and ask why would one spend time and money to create it. The realization is quite good. Special effects guys did great job making the pigs interaction realistic; the actors played well.. (assuming they were asked to play weirdos). Now the plot is 100% predictable from the very beginning of the movie. You can even predict what would happen in the sequel of it if it's ever made. If there is any value of this movie, it's bringing attention to the animal fate in our world.. and maybe doubtful BIO/GMO-Free food marketing line of some corporations, but that's it. This could be done with a 2min clip, instead. Anyway, might be good for some bizarre videos fans.
The Shallows (2016)
Disappointing even if you don't expect much...
It's hard to expect much from just another approach to 'Jaws' sequel, but still the reviews are promising and Blake Lively makes you give it a go...
Unortunately, the movie already starts very American and naive and it just gets worse. The acting is not bad and the plot does make some sense, it would be scary and it could make a nice book, but it's just too unrealistic to watch. There is nothing making you feel like you're there or connection to the characters.
Some things strike more than the others, but even for inattentive spectators it just seems too childish and plastic. I definitely expected a bit better finishing in that budget too.
Anyway when you still think, that the movie was just not THAT bad, you watched nice landscapes, cute actress and would possibly rate it 5-6 stars, in the last 10min you realize that you have just wasted your evening.