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Reviews
The Devil's Rejects (2005)
There's only ONE reject here...
The only reject from the devil is director Rob Zombie himself. Such a god-awful man in the department of performing arts, and even worse in film-making. He really thinks he's something with entering the horror genre, and trying to mimic those who have come before him. He knows NOTHING about film-making, and this film, along with it's equally as bad first prove that very well. There is no style or real substance to this film. It's a mere copy-cat of thousands of drive-in B movies that were released back in the 1970s.
Zombie ties to use the title as a way to explain people in society so bad that even hell will not have them. Ha ha, nice try. This film is what is so bad hell will not have. He essentially goes berserk and overboard in attempt to bring about some chocking and fun campfest of a story-line. it doesn't work. His story is familiar and boring. Not an homage at all. Just stupidity and essentially, artistic plagiarism. God, he even utilizes genre actors as P.J. Soles, Mary Woronov, Michael Berryman, and ultimately, Sid Haig in an uber embarrassing role as a clown faced killer. One can easily tell just how dumb Zombie must be to make films as this, without any real knowledge of how to do it right, let alone at all. Cinematically, the film has nothing to offer except with bad execution of how you do NOT make a film. How do films like these get the greenlight? Oh yeah, Zombie has money and a following. I remember now. That, he may have, but it does not mean he also has talent. He certainly does not have any of that.
Zombie has continued to make films since this. How very sad that companies and financiers will let him do this. Even more, how disgusting that people have paid the kind of money for films such as this, that will warrant more films of the like. Gross and obscene. What is the average spectator amounting to? One thing is for sure, this film is also rejected by the devil. Even he knows how bad it is. He knows all about how bad his name is as it sits in the title. Zombie is the only reject from the devil that stands here on earth...a more real hell than the one we think of otherwise...
Desperate Housewives (2004)
Overrated actresses, overrated show.
Now that the second season is concluding, I want to say that I HATE this show, which gives off a bad vibe spreading like a plague. Thanks to Marc Cherry, we will be living with these dumbfounded housewives for the next few years, unless people get their brains checked, which is unlikely to happen! This show is an advocate for woman to watch 4 overrated actresses (not including Felicity Huffman, the only good one) to go through all these dumb stories that would better on "Days Of Our Lives" I can't stand it, I hate it! Most the cast is really bad too. Especially Marsha Cross, she is so ugly, and her head looks like a golden egg, or something all shiny and tight because she is so stupid and concerned about a single line that she is willing to look inhuman to fix it, and her acting is total crap! Avoid this junk!
Zombiegeddon (2003)
Why do these films get made?
Okay, I feel I must praise those who have given this film the bad rap it deserves! For starters, I remember getting invited to a special screening for, lets say, six bucks or so. I was expecting to see a wretched pile of bull, but I got something worse than that! I was so sure that having a few union actors such as Savini would give a little depth, or something enjoyable. NOPE! This film was the most pathetic concoction ever put onto film. Loust script, horrid acting, lame effects, and a whole lot of unreal violence that was just stupid to begin with. John Waters' "Pink Flamingos" looks like an early Spielberg classic in comparison, and thats a bad thing. I never had a problem with the Waters exercise in 'poor taste', because there was a message about it, this film, was just stupid. I cannot be more specific than that. Just stupid.
Now, it began out with an extremely unbelievable sex scene with Tom Savini and Brinke Stevens. Stevens then retreats to her radio office to conduct a question and answering about zombies. We then see the worst acting of a man and his son hunting zombies, and a tiger is involved...er something. Anyway, a community is under attack with a bunch of idiots running around getting killed one by one. The lead cops are sick and sleazy, and achieve sexual kicks by forcing young males to make love. It is just stupid I tell you! They don't give a crap about civilians. I can understand a filmmakers need to be self-expressive, but there are limits to which art become ridiculous and repetitive. The rest of the story has a lot of bad acting, cheap vomit effects, dreadful dialog, and the STUPIDEST climax to be seen by anyone, be it whoever. My finale plea, is that the filmmakers of this movie need to be banned from writing, directing, or any other type of process in the industry. I thought I was going to see some film that would at least be on its way to a real film-festival...alas, this film was NOTHING! My advice would be to make sure NO ONE ever see's this film again. Then the world would be a better place.
I just have to ask...why do these films get made? They're just so dumb, and offer nothing. If someone actually likes them, then they need help!