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Cryptic (I) (2014)
10/10
Enthralling and unique
6 February 2016
Warning: Spoilers
Get Carter meets Usual Suspects meets Agatha Christie meets Shaun of the Dead in an intriguing plot that keeps you guessing right to the final act.

The entire film is set in a crypt and features just 9 characters. Kudos to both the directors and cast for managing to give all these characters enough back story and development to elevate them from pastiche and make them interesting and indeed likable - despite their criminal and in some case psychotic natures.

The "Mcguffin" of the story is a coffin located in the crypt that 8 gangsters, dealers and crooks are brought together to guard. Beyond that is a more abstract story involving gang warfare, revenge killing and a blood-thirsty vampire. I wondered at one point if the contents of the coffin would NOT be revealed, but don't worry the film does have a conclusion, thus I suppose the McGuffin isn't actually a McGuffin!!! I'm pleased about that because I generally find films that don't offer a satisfactory ending thoroughly frustrating. Rest assured you do get a conclusion - albeit one that will make you go back and replay the story in your mind. Indeed I shall be watching the film again very soon to try and spot the "clues."

Hard to pick out any performances as the whole cast were excellent, but special shout outs to Ben Shafik - the most erudite heroine addict you have ever seen, Philip Barantini - wonderfully funny as one half of a pair of unstable brothers and finally Ed Stoppard who has the perhaps unenviable role of being the character that does much of the explaining for the audience's benefit.

Check this out: A) you'll enjoy it. B) supporting independent films is very important if we want to see challenging and interesting projects like this get produced
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2/10
Alas, not terribly good
11 June 2011
I wanted to like this movie, but I'm afraid I just couldn't - sorry. Here are my main faults.

1) Film-makers -here's a tip - the CLOSE-UP can be an effective tool in story telling, BUT if you ONLY use close ups and never any other angles, it just ends up feeling like you are trapped in a cardboard box with the actors.

2) The lighting - TOO DARK. I had to adjust the settings on my TV to make out the action and in the end I just couldn't tell who the different characters were. Which brings me to....

3) Characters - except for 3 or 4 guys I just didn't know who was who. There was not enough time spent developing any personalities before we head off to France and.....

4) France - and particularly Normandy. Had anyone involved in the film ever been to Normandy? The roads, fields and countryside used for filming look NOTHING like Normandy and what was with that brand new American style wooden fence. There is NOTHING like that in Normandy.

5) Acting - Now I know that I shouldn't expect Matt Damon and other A-listers in every film. But where did they find this lot? Bar a couple of exceptions they were all awful. Surely there are college actors out there who don't sound like they are reading everything off idiot boards? As I say, I wanted to like this film, I know some of the guys who were filmed jumping and others involved in the original concept. But, this truly is a piece of garbage. Well intended perhaps - but a piece of garbage nonetheless.

Sorry
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7/10
Does what it does well enough
7 January 2011
If you have seen the trailer and gone ahead and bought or rented the movie, then you know what to expect. This isn't Bergman's The Seventh Seal, or Welles Citizen Kane. It is what it is, a funny family movie with lots of forest critters causing trouble for Brendon Fraser.

Of course Brendon has done better more artful movies, of course he's done more adult-themed action, but why all the hate for this movie? Sometimes I want a sophisticated cerebral comedy with witty satire and subtlety, just like sometimes I want a fancy meal. But there also times I just want to kick my shoes off, sink a beer, scoff a pizza, burp and watch a fun film. This is what you get with Furry Vengeance, and it delivers what it sets out to deliver.

The performances are exaggerated sure, and yes, you can tell no-one has spent months refining the CGI. But what the hell, the movies makes you smile throughout, with a few laugh out loud moments thrown in too, and the extras on the DVD prove that everyone had a good time making the film.

Chill out all you negative reviewers, appreciate this movie for what it is.
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Bomber (2009)
9/10
Refreshingly different
9 October 2010
I found this movie via a Facebook page and promptly ordered the DVD direct from the producers, mainly because I like Shane Taylor as an actor. Normally a low budget indie film would pass me by, but I'm really glad I bought this.

In an era where so many movies fill up all the pauses between dialogue with explosions, gun fire and cgi, it's wonderful to have a film that breathes. Indeed, as witty and clever as the dialogue is, it's actually the silences, reactions and looks between the cast that make this film what it is. Not that it's all "moody silences" and art-house pretentiousness. The movie isn't one of those "trying so hard to give us a message" stories that make up for lack of story by trying over hard to be worthy. No, this is a well told story of ordinary people, with ordinary feelings that we all encounter with our own families.

The acting is simply excellent and the use of real German locations and people as extras grounds the film with a sense of realism. The production values and photography are far better than you might expect from a low budget film, in fact I would have just assumed this was a typical production with a crew of hundreds if I had not watched the director's commentary on the DVD.

My only tiny tiny complaint, is that I never really believed in Benjamin Whitrow as a WWII veteran. His great acting very nearly convinced me otherwise, but unfortunately he was just a little too young looking, and as good as he was in the role I couldn't quite accept that he had been 18 in 1943. That said, the family dynamic and interplay was so utterly convincing I would not have substituted an older actor at the cost of this relationship believability.

Worth getting
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Big Top (2009– )
Just awful
1 January 2010
You can imagine the BBC big-wigs planning this, let's take a star from each of the following hit shows - The Fast Show, Blackadder and Hi-de-Hi. Add the sister of a movie star, a foreigner with a comedy eastern European accent and Amanda Holden, clearly one of the current "flavours of the month" from Britain's got Talent and the celebrity magazines and we should have a massive hit......

Well, what a disaster: tired flat jokes, a wooden and unfunny performance from Holden and predictable writing Tony Robinson is in some sort of catatonic trance throughout each episode. He's clearly there in body, but his eyes tell you he'd rather be in a trench talking about pottery.

If this programme was a horse, it would have been taken out and shot. It is a prime example of being less than the sum of it's parts.
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