Reviews

Coming from a time of the legendary car chase, think Bullitt, French Connection, Vanishing Point, Italian Job and The Driver. And before Fast and Furious this one stands out as having possibly the best and most realistic chase and definitely has the worst film leading up to the chase.

The film was written, produced and directed by stuntman H.B Halicki who also stars as the main car thief and man driver in the chase. And that's what this film is all about the chase, the 93 cars destroyed as Halicki's Maindrian Pace and Eleanor (the Ford Mustang, credited in the film) sped around various parts of Los Angeles (Long Beach to Carson) past unsuspecting bystanders, who had no idea what they were seeing was not a real police chase.

While the chase is spectacular, the film leading up to it is awful, made cheaply and badly, seemingly overdubbed, also badly. It is maybe worth fast forwarding to the start of the chase and ignoring what came before because it doesn't really matter.

If you are a fan of car chases then this film is a must watch. I would rate it as the second best chase, only because Maindrian was not on a mission from god.

Featured on Episode 74 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast.

This is probably the worst sequel ever made and possibly one of the worst films ever made, especially when you consider it cost over 20 million. Made 12 years after Jaws (one of the great films made by one of the great directors), Jaws 4 brought the film franchise to a screeching halt and if Jaws 3 didn't start the huge dip in quality would have been a total shock.

Shocking (not in a good way) special effects, horrible acting, terrible writing and an unbelievable story of a vengeful shark tracking the remaining members of the Brody clan from New England to the Bahamas to try and wipe them out.

The best parts of this film are the flash back to Chief Brody in the first film.

Watch this film if and only if you want to spend days trying to answer these questions.

How did a shark track people who took a plane? How did Mario Van Peebles survive being eaten by Bruce? Why only 7 Razzie Award nominations? What did Steven Spielberg think of this?

Featured on Episode 75 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast.

Somehow this film is considered a comedy classic and Chevy Chase a comedy legend but I don't see it. From the idiotic premise of an idiot bringing his idiotic family on an idiotic journey to what I'll assume is an idiotic theme park. The journey involves doing idiotic things and meeting more idiotic family members. None of them funny or even remotely close to being funny. How this spawned a bunch of sequels and what is basically a remake is beyond me. I won't give this film an excuse of it might have been good back then because airplane and blazing saddles are older and funnier, watch them instead. Featured on Episode 68 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast.

The second meeting of the Alien and the Predator is a bit of a letdown. Too much of the film takes place in near darkness and the action is hard to make out. Since it's an alien and predator film this doesn't really matter because you have to assume one of these title characters is dispatching the last human you've watched stumbling towards their doom but by that stage you've most likely figured out who everyone is and what they've gone on to do and stopped caring about what happens to them.

This might be the perfect film for those who spend half the time looking at facebook/twitter, just pick your spot when the screen turns extra dark and go for it.

Featured on Episode 66 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast.

This is one sequel that lives up to the cliché, that sequels are never better than the original.

Money Money Money, it,s all about the money in this follow up to 21 Jump Street. Clearly made to cash in on the surprise hit that was the first film, this supposed comedy filled with Hollywood in-jokes and jokes about how old Hill and Tatum are fails to deliver the funny. There was nothing new or original here, aside from when the lads take drugs and have to do cop stuff, oh wait wasn't that lifted straight from the last film.

If you want to watch some 30 year old guys in college or school then stick with the original movie or TV show or maybe even Grease 2(Episode 59).

Featured (unfortunately) on Episode 63 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast.

This is a decent high school horror with a mix of up and coming actors and established stars. From the writer of Scream and the director of From Dusk Til Dawn, while not quite the classic this film had a lot to recommend it and is worth a watch.

Aliens or parasites or alien parasites, it doesn't really matter are trying to take over the world one school at a time. In Herrington High School Josh Harnett (sporting a left over Jim Carey haircut from Dumb and Dumber) leads a plucky band of misfits (featuring hobbits, girl-racers and that guy from that thing) on a quest to rid their school of water obsessed body snatchers.

Featured on Episode 64 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast.

The semi autobiographical movie of Eminem's life blurs the lines between fact and fiction. It follows the trials and tribulations of a young white rapper growing up in a predominantly black area. Constantly catching grief from his boss in a dead end job while he tries to get his rap career off the ground with help from his friends. All the while juggling a recent break up, promiscuous new love interest and insatiable mother who craves head. The film show's a gritty white trash life style we could only imagine but never fully comprehend all to the rubbish sound track of cheesy rap battles. While this movie done enough to entertain it done nothing for my interest in rap music. Featured on The Emerald Reprobates pod-cast episode 62

Four brothers is a good by the numbers action movie with just enough story and character development to keep you interested and the right amount of twists/red herrings to make it smart but never trying to be to clever. The movie follows the seemingly random killing of a sweet old woman who just happens to have fostered four of the biggest f**k up hard men you could imagine. As the brothers look into the circumstances of her death they realize her death was not random but orchestrated and covered up by gangsters and cops alike. This movie was never going to trouble the Oscar committee but its a solid 109 minutes of action/revenge movie. featured on Emerald Reprobates pod-cast episode 60

This is a spectacularly bad sequel to the John Travolta and Olivia Newton John 1978 hit, stars Michelle Pfeiffer and a bunch of other people including that guy from TJ Hooker and the women from Louie.

It looks as if the people who made this looked at the original and decided to remove everything that worked and replace it with songs that weren't even good enough for the cutting room floor of Grease and acting not good enough for a day time soap opera.

If you are looking for a film with a bunch of men and women in their late 20's maybe early 30's pretending to be high school kids singing bad, bad songs then this is the film for you but if you are looking for s film you might enjoy watching then this is not the film for you.

Featured on Episode 59 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast

If you are sitting down to watch Highlander 3, I will assume you have already watched at least one of the previous films and know what to expect.

If for some reason this is your first Highlander film then. Welcome, pull up a chair, grab some popcorn, a tasty beverage and prepare yourself for a poor film, poorly written, poorly acted and full of effects that are far from special.

The best part of the film is the guy who has been trapped in a cave for 400 years but has no problem living in the world of 1994. Make a list of the things he does in 90's New York with no problem despite being from 16th century Japan.

This film might have been good if it was trimmed down and turned into an episode of the Highlander TV show but then again, maybe not.

Featured on Episode 58 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast

This movie may have been well received in the mid 80's but unfortunately it doesn't hold up to well. It's a very slow paced and uneventful movie, that being said it's not necessarily a bad movie. The movie follows the seemingly pointless hiding in an Amish community of a detective (Harrison Ford) who is investigating a murder witnessed by a young boy from the community. During his stay Ford falls for the mother of the child (Kelly McGillis) which serves no more purpose then to give us a god awful dance scene and inevitable forbidden love scenario, the one good thing to come out of this arrangement is the obligatory 80's tit shot. The films 3rd act is no better or worse then the proceeding two before it, winding down with two murders and a stern talking to as it's climax this movie leaves you with a feeling of mediocre satisfaction because while the plot and script are paper thin the acting is quite good.

Featured on episode 57 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast.

First things first, I don't care for Will Ferrell in 99% of his movies, that being said this film falls into the 1% category (Far from the rubbish Talladega Nights and pretty close to the excellent Night at the Roxbury). Despite what should be a lame and uninteresting 'sport' to base a movie on I found myself really enjoying the ridiculousness of everything, from the themed outfits and routines to the childish arguments between Ferrell and Heder.

This movie is far from perfect but it put a bigger smile on my face than I expected and even made me laugh out loud a few times. Derek.

This is a parody of sports films and parody means to make fun of and that's where this film like all other Will Ferrell film fails, it is not in the least bit funny. James. Featured on Episode 56 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast

This film comes straight from the 80's action mould. And not the good mould that Top Gun came out of.

The loner with no memory but super ninjistu skills and his army buddies face off against generic European bad guys and Black Star Ninjas.

The good guys win, the girl falls for the guy and everybody lives happily ever after except the non American ninjas and the Sensei of the good ninja.

The fact this spawned four sequels must have been part of some tax dodge by the producers.

If you are looking for an action film from 1985, give Rambo First Blood Part 2 a look before you watch this.

Featured on Episode 55 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast

Sometimes classic stories do not need to be re-imagined or pumped up for a new audience and this is a prime example.

The film starts out OK but that's the part that gives Adam's back story and sticks to the Mary Shelley book. Once the gargoyles and demons appear this film loses its way. Jumping into the present day were Gargoyle trained Adam is still fighting demons, billionaire business men demons at that.

If Dr Frankenstein was making his monster out of movies, instead of human body parts he would leave this piece of crap on the laboratory floor.

Featured on Episode 54 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast

The weakest of the three films but worth a watch, especially if you are an action fan.

The first two made money so Sly, The State and the rest of the lads are back. And this time it's PG-13 Terry Crews and Jet Li had better things to do, so Stallone brings in some young blood in the form of Ronda Rousey and Ortiz. It doesn't help, fans of these films want to see old action stars face off, not young fighters thrown into the mix.

In the way of old action stars it was nice to see Mel Gibson, Wesley Snipes and Harrison Ford show up with an array of silly names and wisecracks about were Snipes has been.

Featured on Episode 53 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast

Sometimes there are dumb comedies and sometimes there are smart comedies and sometimes there are comedies without comedy. Unfortunately this is one of those films. There is not even the slightest hint of humour in the 93 minutes. From Clark's gambling problems and feud with a croupier to his adventures on the Hoover Dam, none of the usual Griswald charm is there.

National Lampoon took their name off the title of this film; I'm surprised the city of Las Vegas didn't attempt to get their name removed as well. Taking a trip to that fine town has never been made look so unappealing.

I would like to say something positive about this film since it came from a great line of comedies but I can't. Avoid this film at all costs.

If you are looking for a Las Vegas based comedies try Swingers, Ocean's 11, The Hangover or even Casino.

Featured on Episode 52 of The Emerald Reprobates Podcast