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EskimoChain
Reviews
The Black Phone (2021)
LOUD AND SHARP
THIS IS FILM WAS QUITE FUN SINCE THE VOLUME AT THE THEATURE WAS REAL SHARP AND MADE THE THUNDER SEEM AMPLIFIED, IT SEEMED LIKE A SUNDANCEFILM OF QUALITY, AND A GOOD ATTEMPT TO MAKE A MODERN HORROR MOVIE.
Anna Nicole (2007)
CUTE MOVIE
I SAW THIS FILM ON AMAZON PRIME TODAY. I THOUGHT IT PORTRAYED ANNA NICOLE SMITH IN A GENEROUS LIGHT. WILLA FORD'S IMITATION WAS PLEASANT. I THOUGHT I HAD SEEN THIS FILM BEFORE YET I HADN'T. IT HAS A RELATIVELY SAD ENDING SINCE SHE APPEARS TO DIE FROM A FEVER. PERSONALLY I THINK SHOULD HAVE CHOSEN SIMPLE WHEAT TO EAT, INSTEAD OF WHATEVER ELSE SHE WAS EXPERIMENTING WITH. ALTOGETHER A GOOD ONE I BELIEVE DEFINITELY A DVD WORTH KEEPING.
Cruella (2021)
INTERESTINGLY DELIGHTFUL FILM
I SAW THIS MOVIE AT THE THEATER TODAY. IT IS A WELL LENGTHED FILM OVER 2 HOURS. IT IS FAST PACED SO IT DOESN'T DISAPPOINT. THE COSTUMES WERE CUTE AND THOUGHTFUL. IT WAS LIVE ACTION FOR THE MOST PART WHICH I MUCH PREFERRED TO THE PREVIOUS CARTOON. I THOUGHT EMMA STONE PART WAS WELL PLAYED QUITE ADORABLE. I LOOK FORWARD TO OTHER SUCH WORKS. THANKS
KISS KISS.
The Neverending Story (1984)
PERSONAL FAVORITE OF MINE.
THIS IS A CLASSIC FILM. WHICH SEEMS NEW EACH TIME I SEE IT. THIS WAS ONE OF THE FIRST MOVIES I HAD SEEN AS A CHILD. AS THE STORY GOES ON IT HAS A PERSONAL FEEL TO IT, AS IF THE VIEWER BECOMES PART OF IT. WELL DONE THANKS
KISS KISS.
Saint Maud (2019)
LOWER THAN ONE STAR IF POSSIBLE
I FOUND THIS MOVIE HIDEOUS. I THOUGHT IT WOULD GET BETTER AS IT WENT ON, YET NO IT DID NOT. I DID NOT LIKE THE SUBJECT MATTER. THE CAMERA WORK IS AWEFUL, I FOUND THE CAMERA FILTER SICKENING, AS WELL AS THEE ACTING.
The Love Witch (2016)
INTERESTING FILM
I DON'T THINK THE LADY IN THE MOVIE WAS A WITCH. IT WAS FILMED COLORFULLY, AND THE COSTUME WERE PRETTY. NOT BAD..
KISS KISS.
Una (2016)
NOT WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR
I WAS WATCHING THIS ON AMAZON PRIME, I THOUGHT IT WAS A HORROR FILM BY THE TITLE AND COVER. TURN OUT TO BE A STUPID SEX SCENE MOVIE, WHICH WAS UNBEARABLE UNTIL FINALLY THE CREDITS CAME AND I COULD REVIEW IT..
KISS KISS.
Cowgirls vs. Pterodactyls (2021)
NOT BAD
I WAS WATCHING THIS FILM WHILE I WAS SEARCHING GOOGLE TO FIND A WIFE, AND I FOUND IT PRETTY KEWL FOR THE FILMS INCLUDED ON AMAZON PRIME
KISS KISS.
Attack of the 50 Foot Cheerleader (2012)
DISLIKED.
THIS IS ANOTHER FILM IT FELT AS BEING TORTURE HAVING TO WATCH THIS UNTIL THE END TO REVIEW IT. IT SEEMED TO LACK WHAT I WANTED A FILM TO BE.
KISS KISS.
Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)
KONG IS DEAD
I FIRST SAW THE ORIGINAL KONG VS GODZILLA IN LIKE 1992 ON VHS. I THOUGHT THIS ONE WAS A GOOD FILM TOO. THE DESTRUCTION OF KONG AND GODZILLA CAUSES MANY CASUALTIES. YET KONG AND GODZILLA SURVIVE, I HOPE ANOTHER IS MADE TO AVENGE THE DEAD...
Sam (2017)
ABSOLUTELY AWFUL
THIS IS KINDA A FREAKY FRIDAY TYPE THEME FILM. THE MAN "SAM" IN THE BEGINNING OF THE FILM CHANGES AND BECOMES A WOMAN, WHO I FOUND SO RIDICULOUSLY IRRITATING I FELT AS IF IT WAS TORTURE TO FINISH THIS FILM BEFORE REVIEWING IT.
KISS KISS.
Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)
KEWL MOVIE ALTHOUGH MY WONDER WOMAN COMIC WOULD BE DIFFERENT
I SAW THIS FILM AS WELL AS THE 2017 WONDER WOMAN. I LIKED BOTH. ALTHOUGH WONDER WOMAN HAS A LOVE INTEREST IN THE MOVIE, WHICH IS A LITTLE DIFFERENT THAN HOW I WOULD WRITE MY OWN WONDER WOMAN STORY. I WOULD INSERT MYSELF AS HER LOVE INTEREST, HAVE HER DEFEAT ANY ENEMY OF MINE, THEN BUILT A ROCKET-SHIP AND A PALACE ON THE MOON TO BEGIN REPRODUCTION. PALACE INCLUDING KING SIZED BED, SILK ROBES AND BED SHEETS. A LARGER TELEVISION , CARPETED ROOMS, WITH FAVORED MULTICOLORED LED LAMPS, AND CANDLES AS LIGHTING. ALSO AN ALL (MCDONALDS,BURGERKING,WENDY'S, ECT) CONTAINING FAST FOOD STORAGE FACILITY TO SUITE APPETITICAL NEED.
KISS KISS.
Snow White (1987)
CUTE FILM
I WAS BORN JUST ABOUT WHEN THIS CAME OUT, SO I FIGURED IT WOULD BE QUITE GOOD. I THOUGHT THIS FILM IS MOST DEFINITELY BETTER THAN THE OLDER DISNEY CARTOON. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK ;)
Madame Bovary (2014)
FAIR AND NOT SO FAIR
THE FIRST HALF OF THE FILM SHOWS (KINDA) A ROYAL WEDDING, VISUALLY BEAUTIFUL, THE CAMERA FILTERS AND LANDSCAPES AND THE WAY EVERYONE IS DRESSED. SADLY THE MAIN LADY, SEEMS TO FORNICATE (YET FORCED TO) WITH A MAN NEAR THE LATTER PART OF THE SECOND HALF OF THE FILM. THEN BECOMES UPSET AND APPEARS TO DIE IN A FIELD AT THE END.
The Wizard of Oz (1939)
VERY PRAISE WORTHY
THIS IS PROBABLY MOST INTERESTING MOVIE SINCE SLICED BREAD. DOROTHY SEEMS TO LIKE HER DOG BETTER THAN ELMIRA. ELMIRES SAYS THE DOG BIT HER SO SHE WANTS HIM DESTROYED. DOROTHY DOESN'T BELIEVE HER AND THINKS SHE JUST WANTS TO KILL HER DOG SINCE SHE LIKES HIM. A TORNADO PICKS UP DOROTHY'S HOUSE AND THROWS IT, AND SHE IS KNOCKED UNCONSCIOUS, AND WAKES UP IN OZ (YET STILL SLEEPING). SHE MEETS THE TIN MAN, THE SCARE CROW, AND THE LION. SHE MAKES FRIEND WITH THEM , AND SHE WANTS TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET HOME. SHE EVENTUALLY DEFEATS THE WICKED WITCH OF THE WEST WITH WATER. DOROTHY AND HER FRIENDS GET AWARDED BY THE WIZARD OF OZ AND SHE EVENTUALLY AWAKES IN HER BED WITH HER FAMILY WATCHING OVER HER.
The Guest House (2012)
KEWL FILM
INTERESTING FILM ABOUT TWO LADIES WHO SEEM TO BE FRIENDS,
SINCERELY,
MORE FEMALE NUDITY.
Spirit Camp (2009)
KEWL FILM
MORE FEMALE NUDITY, SHOULD BE INCLUDED IN EVERY FILM ETERNALLY.
Rango (2011)
GOOD ANIMATED FILM
IS YOU LIKED PIXAR FILMS AS I DID AS A YOUNGER MAN YOU SHOULD ENJOY THIS ONE.
KISS KISS.
One Night (2012)
INTERESTING PORTRAYAL OF A MARRIAGE
THE DIALOGUE IN THIS FILM IS QUITE STRANGE. YET AN INTERESTING PORTRAYAL OF MARRIAGE
Sonic the Hedgehog (2020)
FUN FILM
I ENJOY THIS ONE A BUNCH.. BEING A FAN OF THE VIDEO GAMES SERIES AS A CHILD I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT, YET VERY GOOD AND CUTE.
Deadly Virtues: Love.Honour.Obey. (2014)
STRANGE FILM
FILM ABOUT A MAN WHO SEPARATES ALLEGED MARRIED COUPLE, AND TIES UP THE OTHER MAN. THE THIEF COMMITS ADULTERY WITH THE WOMAN (SUGGESTED).. THEN WOMAN EVENTUALLY SETS HER HUSBAND FREE LATER ON, AND THE MAN LEAVES WHOM FORCED BOTH OF THEM. AND THEN THE WOMAN KILLS HER HUSBAND AFTER AN ARGUMENT.
The Escort (2015)
TERRIBLE
PROSTITUTION AND PROFANITY IS NOTHING TO MAKE LIGHT OF... I FOUND THIS FILM IRRITATING AND GENERALLY UNFAVORABLE.
Mother! (2017)
GOOD
""REMEMBER THE DAYS OF DARKNESS FOR THEY SHALL BE MANY, FOR ALL THAT COMETH IS VANITY."
Saw (2004)
STORY OF BRUTALITY AND OPPRESION
"WHEN FOLLY IS SET IN GREAT DIGNITY THEE RICH SIT IN A LOW PLACE."
Fifty Shades Freed (2018)
BEAUTIFUL AND MORE BETTER
A GREAT SHOW ABOUT MARRIAGE AND WEALTH. BLESSED IS THE MAN THAT SEEITH IT. FOR BETTER IS LOVE THAN HATE, AND THOU SHALT NOT COMMIT ADULTERY. MUSIC WAS DESCENT, AND THEE RAIMENT USURY. FOR RIGHT IS RIGHTEOUSNESS.