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locholmez
Reviews
Rovdyr (2008)
I like plots
And this movie doesn't have one. Sorry.
There's the good guys and the bad guys. The bad guys are trying to kill the good guys, the good guys are trying to get out of the woods so they won't get killed.. by the bad guys. That's it.
I was sitting in the theater waiting for the amazing plot twist to reveal itself and change everything into a complex masterpiece. The story was so empty it just had to happen. "This can't be all there is to it", I thought to myself, "something amazing and unexpected will happen very soon." But it didn't. The bad guys were still doing their thing and the good guys tried to escape. Worthless.
Oh yeah, and the acting sucked.
Queen of the Damned (2002)
This movie ruined my life
This is the worst movie I have seen in my entire life. I can't BELIEVE it has an INCREDIBLE 4.6 here at IMDb. That makes it the most overrated piece of crap E V E R. Makes me sick!
About three years ago, I was fooling around with this hot blonde in my class. We had been back and forth because of her insane boyfriend, which kept me from reaching my goals. However, they were also back and forth, and she broke up with him (like fifty times, but this time it seemed to be for real). So she finally agreed to watch a movie with me some Saturday night, in my home. Sex was REALLY in the air, and I had been trying to get into her pants FOREVER. Get it? FOREVER, damnit! She practically said "Hey, we should have sex after that movie we're going to see."... not that she hadn't been inviting before, but with the boyfriend out of the picture and everything, I figured this had to be it. And it probably would be..
So before she shows up I had to get downtown to rent a movie. I remember seeing K-PAX in the shelf, and this "Queen of the Damned". I also remember reading the word "erotic" in a bi-sentence or something on the (Norwegian) back cover. Seemed perfect for the occasion, so I rented it.
I got back home, she showed up (first and last time she set foot inside my house). We started watching the movie. Needless to say, a movie has the power to change an atmosphere completely. It can be a great way to get things going with someone. It doesn't have to be sexual or romantic, anything exciting or just funny usually gets the atmosphere right for more flirting, and so on. Even some bad movies might work; if you can start making fun of it in some way, it might kill off the nervous tensions and break the ice.
Queen of the Damned failed miserably at everything. Not only did it NOT break ANY ice, it killed off all hope by adding several layers! It seemed like we sat there for ten hours scratching our faces, not being able to communicate. When the pain was over, she left within 15 minutes.
I can't describe with my poor English vocabulary how painful this movie was. I didn't get in anybody's pants, AND it was actually awkward to see her again the next Monday. As I'm typing this, she's pregnant with her about-seven-years-older-than-me-with-a-sports-car-and-tattoo dumb-ass new boyfriend. THANK YOU, QUEEN OF THE DAMNED!
Izzat (2005)
Terrible acting
I still get flashbacks from this movie. Not from the violence, drugs or boobs, but from the terrible acting. Some scenes were actually embarrassing to watch. Part of the problem might be that Emil Marwa's voice is dubbed (because of his British accent), by Zahid Ali.
Norwegian movies tend to have this pain-in-the-ass acting problem, but this seemed to slowly vanish over the past years with help from great actors like Aksel Hennie, Kristoffer Joner, Per Christian Ellefsen and many(?) more. I might overreact, but Izzat does not in any way comfort me to believe we're still on this track.
The plot of Izzat is worth a 6/10, but the acting is just too damned painful.