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Formula 1: Drive to Survive (2019)
Meaningless lives, useless goals, but good entertainment.
The show is well-made, and some of the principal players' moves are better than those in Game of Thrones, especially Cyril from Renault and Ricciardo.
But now, it's time for some sermon. At least two billion are spent every year. Thousands of people are involved in the business, hundreds of engineers who could spend their time inventing something beneficial, and hundreds of thousands of idiots who follow this so-called sport. It's no wonder that this planet will go up in flames. Do I have to mention the level of nepotism present in the business? It's evident for anyone to see. It's in your face. Imagine now those engineers working for a worthy cause and spending billions on a worthwhile cause yearly.
A sport in which drinks companies win championships. How ridiculous is that? You only need money, nothing else. A drinks company has not one but two teams in Formula 1.
I can't think of any more useless death than that in a car crash racing for Formula 1. It's no wonder they chose their drivers young. When you're young, you are less aware of the risks involved and what you have to lose. When you're young, you are reckless, and the organizers of Formula 1 exploit this feature of being young. They exploit the worst feature of being young; they use it for a meaningless purpose: to win a race. In and of itself, it's not a big thing to want to win a race, but it seems perverse when the risks are so significant. You risk your life every time you race. Those adults know better. This makes them awful human beings.
How stupid can you be to encourage your child to have this empty goal in life, to be a driver in Formula 1?
American Fiction (2023)
One of the best movies anti-woke movies.
The movie's first five minutes, with those woke students in the classroom, are enough to justify this movie's existence.
We have all seen too many movies in which black men are reduced to a couple of negative traits: drug traffickers and deadbeat dads. It's refreshing to see someone who doesn't like his duties to his family but acquits himself of them. It's also good to see someone aware of his flaws. He doesn't make much to fix them, but at least he knows them. Also, he is never a hypocrite. He truly considers his book garbage.
Who is responsible for shaping our culture? Movie producers, book editors, and music producers. They seem so shallow and mediocre in this movie. It makes you wonder.
The way Agnes Ellison is treated in the movie, like an irresponsible child despite having moments of clarity, is awful. This is not a comment about the film; it's a comment about our society. All those resources spent taking care of human carcasses seem to me obscene. The fact that we don't give people a chance to end their life on their terms is odious.
Mr. Jones (2019)
Important subject, good actors, lousy execution.
There is a time and a place for visual effects in movies like this, special effects that enrich the visual experience. The scene with the bicycle in the last part of the movie is not one of them. After all Jones endured in Ukraine, a trip on the bicycle, no matter the distance, is not a heroic journey.
Do you understand at the end of this movie why communism is such a criminal ideology? Not likely.
Do you understand how normal people like Duranty and, to a lesser extent, Ada Brooks could hide and excuse flagrant criminal acts? Not likely.
Do you understand at the end of the movie that those soviet soldiers who helped impose famine in Ukraine are as bad as those Nazis in the extermination camps? Not really.
Do you get from this movie how bad censorship, the suppression of information is? Not really.
Finally, Orwell's presence in the movie is pointless.
One Day (2024)
How to ruin a television series.
This television series could have been a story about friendship. Instead, they made it a love story, as if we didn't have enough of those. It could have been a movie about a friendship with a cult following. What a wasted opportunity this movie was.
This movie was about friendship up to a point, and I would have liked to be about it till the end. The breaking point of Dexter's and Emma's friendship was when they acted like true friends, telling each other hard truths. They didn't understand what the job of a true friend was. If you get upset if a friend tells you something true and painful, you protect your fragile ego from everybody, which is the best way not to grow. Do you think a stranger who doesn't care about you will tell you the hard truths you need to hear? They had a much too fragile concept of friendship. Everything is now much too delicate in Western culture.
What was good in the movie? How they choose to depict in the film the illness and demise of Alison, Dexter's mother, is extremely subtle and delicate. It's the most delicate and private way I've seen on the screen, and I've seen thousands of movies.
What was bad? Fights are not normal. Please, stop trying to ram this stupid idea down our throats. It's possible to reach an agreement without a fight. You don't need superhuman qualities to do it. You can discuss your differences calmly and settle them with your partner.
How they chose to end things with Emma was so lame, and the final episode, a tear-jerker, was graceless and embarrassing. Some television series were ruined in the last season; they were a season too long. These guys managed to do this with the last episodes.
The Guilt Trip (2012)
Not even funny.
There is a transformation of a character. The hero chooses to listen to his mother. This was the only thing funny in this movie.
Why must we see movies with characters with so much to learn about healthy human interactions? It is a cheap way to generate conflict between two characters. It is tiring to see grown-ups who don't know how to behave or what a sane relationship between two people looks like.
Everything is off in this movie. Why would you sleep in the same room with your mother when you can afford not to? He is holding his frustration with her too much, then he bursts rudely.
Why would you eat so much that it's a miracle you didn't throw up during the meal? They couldn't find a funny challenge in the whole USA?
The best use for this movie is in a psychology classroom as a case study for a defective relationship between a mother and her son.
Head Above Water (2021)
Living with pain
The head is just about the only part of their body that isn't sore.
Doing sport at the professional level, you are always sore. You have to push through your injuries and destroy your body. A documentary which confirms what I had already known and thought wrong about the world of professional sports.
You can feel Ian Thorpe's sadness and regret of leaving the sport too early because of all the industry that tries to commodify the athletes.
Bronte doing yoga seems the smartest of them all.
Cody Simpson is, for me, the most interesting character, torn between two passions: music and swimming.
The only thing wrong about this documentary is that it is too short and leaves the stories unfinished.
Dance Life (2024)
Dancing from down to dusk
"If you are not hurting after today, you are not doing it right. I want them to be afraid. Your spot in my class is temporary. You have to earn it every day. "Cassie is a great choreographer, but she is awful as a teacher. All this psychology of fear is horrible because it doesn't make you give your best. You don't focus on becoming the best when you constantly fear your position.
The fact that they dance through their injuries is stupid, and the fact they are encouraged to suck it up by the adults in school is also foolish. It's also a school where boys are taught to dance like girls and girls to dance like men.
Every time there is a public performance, there is immense pressure on them. It's like their whole life is on the line. Everything they are depends on that one performance. This attitude does wonders for their mental health.
Yes, agents are essential, but today, you can have a channel on YouTube if you like; you can live like that. Regardless of the agents, if you want to dance for a living, you will find a way, but I didn't hear this mentioned not even once.
They talk about the influence dance had in their life and how it saved their life. Every child should have a passion that absorbs them, can save them from depression, and give them a sense of self-worth. This responsibility falls to their parents and teachers, and, from what I can see around me, it goes unfulfilled much too often.
From Cremona to Cremona (2016)
Tales from East Europe
Being a luthier is a job for some, an art for others, a craft or a way to get rich for yet others. But this documentary is about much more than this.
How can you make it in the West? What is the best way to assimilate and integrate in a foreign Western town if you emigrate from Eastern Europe? Are there models that we should know about?
Does the world of capitalism have nothing to offer but competition and rivalry? Can you form a community with those you are competing with?
What is the dominant feeling in a post-communist country? How can an ideology rob people of hope in the future, even decades after her demise? I'm talking, of course, about the communist ideology.
What is the best way to get over your depression? Not feeling anything? What are the most common ways to rationalize your failures? Who can you blame for your lack of success? The lack of community and friends?
The answers to all these questions are explored in this documentary.
Little Miss Sunshine (2006)
Upward journeys
What is the best way to get over your depression? Take your niece to a miss pageant contest 800 miles away in a decades-old car.
I like the movie's optimism, the belief that you can get over anything if you have people who care about you by your side. Also, you can get over your psychological pain quickly if you find in yourself some measure of empathy for those around you.
I like this movie because the characters have upward journeys, the road trip being a perfect background. Frank is at his lowest point, and he must climb. The next one is Richard, who gets bad news on the road and must get over them. Next is Dwayne, who must also find a way to overcome his broken hopes and dreams.
This effort to overcome the difficulties and setbacks in our lives is the best expression of human potential and any movie that does a decent job expressing this is a ten-star movie for me.
De ce eu? (2015)
Justice in Romania
This is a good movie for his realism. You get to see the workings in the office of a prosecutor's attorney. You get to see the lack of responsibility, the fact that a prosecutor can be taken from a case anytime and that an investigation can be open for your conduct if you don't cave to the political pressure. As a prosecutor, you have to play the ball handed to you by the political class. You are a marionette. In a way, this situation perfectly describes the system of Romanian laws: they are unclear, ripe with contradictions and impossible to follow without a PhD in law.
Unfortunately, there isn't a hero you can identify with. We don't know much about Leca, what kind of guy he is, what he thinks about justice. Also, there is the rumour that his case was made to further the interests of some faction in the Secret Services, Services that control everything, including the police, the prosecutors, and organized crime.
We see what is the form and shape of justice in Romania. The prosecutor has to answer in front of his bosses, who report in front of the general prosecutor, who is named politically. A single person can block every inquiry. We see an institutional organism whose purpose is to intervene when a prosecutor does something disturbing for those with political power.
What does a prosecutor do all day? Papers. Panduru doesn't bother to interrogate Leca. What does Panduru do? He reads and writes reports. What are the charges brought against Leca? He took some papers from the office home, nothing serious except for the bribe, but there isn't evidence, only statements, so more papers. We see a system organized around the production of mountains of paper. This is how all bureaucracy works in Romania.
Chinatown (1974)
Not noir but realist
I don't get it. Why is this film considered noir? We live in the world depicted in the movie: cynic, greedy, cruel.
We live in a world where the rich have different social statuses. Money makes you a privileged citizen. Maybe not all the rich guys get away with murder, but enough do. Also, other crimes seriously impact the lives of ordinary people. Despite their hard work, we see how some farmers are driven to bankruptcy by the drought. We see how the rich become richer not through hard work but because of their influence, because they can bribe and buy public officials. We all live in Chinatown.
First Man (2018)
Hyperrealism in a movie.
There is a style in art, hyperrealism, where the paintings seem more real than the photographs. This movie is hyperreal, more real than any documentary on the subject. It makes you feel like you are in the rocket with Neil. It makes you feel how opening the hatch and seeing the Lunar soil felt to Neil. It also makes you feel how it is to live with somebody who may not come back from work because he died during the day.
How much time can I spend with someone if I'm involved in a project I am obsessed with? What if that project needs all my waking hours? This theme is present in Whiplash, La La Land, and First Man.
Neil has the best attitude towards practice. We need to practice because we need to make mistakes. We need mistakes for experience. We need to learn from them and be able to avoid them when it really matters. When is that? On the Moon. The experience is vital, even if, sometimes can kill you.
Arrival (2016)
Mythologies for the modern age
First contact. How will it take place? If the aliens are coming here, their superiority will be massive in all aspects, from technology to ethics. How will they communicate with us using something so rudimentary they haven't used presumably in centuries? How do you reduce your language to talk to a two-month-old infant? This movie offers a compelling answer.
I hope that the first contact will not happen in the near future. I can't imagine what an intelligent alien race would think about the human race by talking with leaders like Putin, Xi Jinping or Trump. With this kind of leader, I will exterminate the human race.
I find it truly uplifting the way Louise knows that the ending is tragic, and she embraces it and tries to find joy and beauty in fleeting moments. The psychological pain endured by Sisyphus is nothing compared with the pain felt by Louise Banks-Amy Adams.
Dune (2021)
Slow burning in the desert night
I hear Dune Part 2 will be fast-paced. That's too bad. I think we have had enough of those fast-paced, mindless action movies. What Villeneuve does best is make you feel a connection with the characters by focusing on them in their reflective moments.
I know the story. Everybody knows the story in Dune. Despite this, Villeneuve can be original and exciting if he chooses his own style of doing movies and telling stories. What makes him unique in the landscape of today's directors is his ability to make the characters have moments of deep conversation. If he chooses to go the other way, the way of fast-paced, action-filled movies, I predict that Dune 2 will fail.
The Newsroom (2012)
Don Quixote is doing the news
There is a deep core of decency in all the characters in this show. I've always been amazed by the fast rebound from fight mode to understanding and connection displayed by most of the central cast. To go so quickly from fight mode to I understand you, I trust you, and I confess to you, never ceases to amaze me in the best scenes of this show.
All the characters created by Aaron Sorkin in all his shows have some awkwardness in their romantic relationships but are saved by their core of human decency.
This show has many topics, ranging from the Tea Party, Occupy Wall Street movement, tabloid press, journalism malpractice, to Twitter and Reddit, whistle-blowers, national debt, immigration policies, and the rule of law. I have never seen a more thoughtful and intelligent approach to those topics in the articles or podcasts I've listened to.
You have to be Don Quixote even to try to do the news as objectively and intelligently as the team tries to do it in the show; that reference is spot on.
The West Wing (1999)
All Star Trek fans should give this show a go
I want a model for good working relationships, even if it is a fictional one. I want a model for ways to deliver and take criticism. I want a model for voicing my objections and remaining friends at the end of the conversation. This series gave all these models to me.
This series is about optimism, hope and faith in the human ability to rise above our sordid inclinations. This series is the best expression of the American ideal, namely the belief that every problem has a solution and that we can reach a compromise no matter our policy differences. We want to make things work. We can be good, and we can manifest altruism. We can learn from our mistakes and control our anger and frustration.
I get to watch a team with a common goal, all in an atmosphere of respect and loyalty between the team members regardless of differences in opinion.
Star Trek TNG gave as the ideal team for space exploration. The West Wing gave as the ideal team for running a country. I can't think of anything that can more persuasively promote the values of the American experience.
Our Friend (2019)
Not so sad after all
Having read Matt's article for The Esquire, I can say that the movie made Nicole's death much too prettier. There are too many countries where cancer, the disease, gets a free pass. A free pass to rob people of their dignity. A free pass to poison the last months of people's relationships. A free pass to rob people of their freedom to end their lives on their own terms.
Is this a movie about friendship? I would have gone into more detail about the relationship between Matt and Dane before the diagnosis. Also, Dane seems like a lost guy. Why? Why was he lost before the diagnosis and after the end? We never find out.
Also, something is missing from the movie but is present in the article. After all that months, Dane is part of the family. More so than the blood family. I would have liked to hear Matt say it in the movie.
The Banshees of Inisherin (2022)
Just a few steps short of a masterpiece.
I want to give you the lens through which I think about the movie.
I see Brandan and Colin as a traditional couple. Brendan was the man in the relationship, a man obsessed now with his legacy. Colin is the wife who wants peace and kindness. The problem is that Brendan feels that he is running out of time. He lost his patience for trivia and wants to spend time doing what he loves and what has meaning. Also, something that will assure him of his legacy. Colin is the wife that has other plans and needs.
How can you present this visually? How can you make the other understand what is taking from you with each day that is not spent on something meaningful? Cut something off, not any part but one relevant to your life's project.
All good and clear, but somewhere in the middle, the movie turns to nowhere and stays there.
Ad Astra (2019)
No sci-fi, no drama
The blunders in this sci-fi movie are so glaring they make you cringe. It's not the first sci-fi movie to have them, ask Neil deGrasse Tyson, but most of the time you could simply ignore them. Not this time. They are all in your face. As a sci-fi, is an utter failure.
As a father-son drama, we have a father who is an astronaut who has made his life mission to search and find signs of intelligent life in the Universe. Hardly a worthless way to spend your life. The authors of this movie have a different opinion. The interaction between father and son lacks depth, emotion and logic. So, as a drama, it's also an utter failure. And by the way, the religious overtones in this movie are way too harsh for my taste.
Enough with the criticism. How about something constructive? What could have made this movie better? Maybe a different plot, a different theme. There is a great theme in the movie, unfortunately only hinted at. It's about the temptation of institutions to cover things up and how, eventually, this cover up will blow in their face. It is a history lesson that happens over and over again. The Pentagon Papers, the 2016 Democratic National Committee email leak. The same theme could have been developed with the cover up in this movie. It could have been a movie about how it's much better to tell the truth, admit you've made a mistake, treat the public as grown men who can handle it.
Why four stars and not one? Cinematography is good.
Star Trek: Picard (2020)
The fans are right, it's not Star Trek
Yes, something new may unfold because of this new series. For the first time in history it's possible that the hard core fans of the franchise would demand canceling the show after season 1.
We know that in the past some series survived because of the fans' requests and pressure. It happened with The Expanse, and, to a limited degree, with Firefly. With the last one, the fans didn't get a season 2 but they did get a movie.
I've read a lot of reviews and the disappointment is real, clear and it comes from the people who love the Star Trek universe. What is the criticism? No more stand alone episodes. No more exploration of the Universe. No more hope in the human race, hope that what we have now and is bad-like cruelty, careless, greed-will go into remission in the future. No more logic and detached reasoning. No more inspiring visions of the future.
What do we want from Star Trek? A world in which the contrast between the future and the present is as substantial as the contrast between our world and the Dark Ages. We want to see an ideal team, formed by people who know how to communicate, respect and value each other. We want people capable to contain their emotions and the worst aspects of their personalities. We want to see how a group of people are capable to solve a tough problem every episode. Solve it with intelligence, diplomacy, creativity, grace. We want to see a group of people passionate about the unknown, Universe and science. We want analysis of moral dilemmas, and yes, like we've seen in TNG, a culture without religion.
Fortunately, there are some alternatives for you as a sci-fi fan: Black Mirror, The Expanse, even The Orville.
Unfortunately, CBS left us with only one alternative: Trekxit.
Werk ohne Autor (2018)
The search for your distinctive voice
A movie about how you can find your personal voice as an artists. What do you do to find the style that is the perfect match for you? Where do you find the inspiration for something truthful and connected to your inner self? The whole movie can be seen in this key.
But what about the Communists and the Nazis in the movie? They, in recent history, destroyed the artists freedom. You can't find your voice in a totalitarian regime. Why not? Truth, dilemmas, experimentation, innovation don't mix with censorship, the truth of the party, art as a servant for state ideology.
The end is puzzling. The artist makes up a story about the origin of his paintings. A story who is a complete fabrication. Nothing in his paintings is impersonal, they all relate to his experiences, his childhood memories. Why did he choose to lie about it, saying that he used as inspiration pictures made by amateurs? Is contemporary art so incomplete in itself you have to come up with metaphysics behind it to make it interesting? The story about a contemporary painting is more interesting than the painting itself? It was intended as a critique to contemporary art? I don't know, but the paintings in the movie are much better that those made by Gerhard Richter, the artist on whose life the movie is loosely based.
Das Leben der Anderen (2006)
The essence of communism
This film is great because through it you understand what the communism was all about. You understand the power of the secret police STASI and it's influence in society. In this movie we see only it's influence in art, in the world of writers and actors but it had the same power, the same influence in all other aspects of life in German Democratic Republic.
You may have doubts about the transformation of the STASI agent but I don't think it matters very much. What's important is the big picture. You get to feel the discretionary power top politicians and STASI agents had, you get to see how human destinies are destroyed, you see an entire state institution working to make textbooks for the easiest and most efficient way to destroy the human spirit.
American Factory (2019)
Modern slavery and the efforts to implement it in the US.
This is a documentary which offers you a contact with the horrific triumph of Chinese communist ideology. Slaves that are laughing, are joyful when their chance at liberty-in the form of an Union-disappears. This was the most tragic moment in the movie.
You see what the communist propaganda made to the minds of the Chinese. They internalized a strict definition of what it is to be a Chinese: you work 12 hours a day, only two day off a month, enough free time for a cigarette late at night. But, most importantly, they consider this a life worth living.
In a way I was expecting that the Chinese will have their brain washed by the Chinese propaganda. But I didn't expect to see Americans-those in management positions-to wholeheartedly embrace the Chinese way of doing things. As long as they had those positions, they had no problem with no union, poor pay, and had only praise for the Chinese working in the China factory, with 12 hours shifts, two days off a month. It seemed perfect, if only they could do the same in US. But no, is hard to do that in US, not because is inhumane and US society has higher standards for what is a normal work day, but-and what fallows is uttered by an American-because the Americans are lazy. As long as they were paid good money, they tried to do all in their power to implement modern slavery for their compatriots. Their greed made them indifferent to others. Only when they are fired they start to see things differently. Empathy, concern for their US compatriots? Nothing, only greed.
In China every factory has an owner who is revered as a wise and beneficent father. They don't just put pictures of the magnanimous boss on the wall but they also organize shows with dancing and singing for the benevolent boss. What a comfortable position for the CEO and boss. They make millions and the workers, their slaves, sing and praise their slavery.
Who said that the free market is incompatible with communism? We see that the compatibility is perfect. True, in capitalism your slaves don't starve as in North Korea. But they are still slaves.
You see totalitarianism mixed with savage capitalism. The result is total slavery. Lives with little or no value beyond their existence for their owners but valuable for the CEO.
What is life if not work? Asked rhetorically the CEO of the Chinese factory. Life is more than work. Life means to have time for your friends and family. Time to read a book, to have a walk, to learn about the world in which you live. Time to enjoy all the technological progress of the XXI century.
We also see specialized firms that manipulate workers into thinking they don't need a Union. It's a shame that the subject wasn't explored in detail. How can the trainers who work in that kind a firm live with themselves? It's a shame their faces where not shown, I think it would have been just if their neighbors and friends saw what they do for a living. It's important that everybody around them knows what their work consists in, namely making sure someone stays a slave. The lobbyists for tobacco and alcohol seem innocent compared with these guys.
Recount (2008)
A study of character
James Baker (Tom Wilkinson) It was, for me, the most interesting character. What was striking about him was the contrast between his loyalty for Bush senior, a commendable trait, and his actions directed towards the blocking of a fundamental process in a democracy: elections. It was sad to see a man, who in the process of becoming friend with another, lost sight of fundamental values and principles. He is also a man who thinks about himself (like Ben Ginsberg—Bob Balaban) that he is worthy and honorable, a fact clearly rebutted by his actions. He made every effort necessary in order to hinder the finding of truth about the votes. He practically blocked the validation of hundreds of votes of his fellow citizens and all this without any feeling of remorse.
Mac Stipanovich (Bruce McGill) Mac the Knife" is a mercenary. Is interested only in making people to behave favorable to the interest of the people who pay him. Is not interested in doing the right thing, doesn't have a guilty conscience, his mission is simple and he does it effectively. You can wonder how can this kind of people can live with themselves (the ones who were lobbying for tobacco, alcohol, now the war on drugs...)
Mark Herron (Adam LeFevre) He is the idealist in this movie. A man who makes sacrifices in order to do the right thing. He is fired from his law firm because in Florida the majority of law firms have as their clients republicans and they don't want to jeopardize those business contracts.
Clay Roberts (Gary Basaraba) He's a republican who wants to fallow the law. He is one of the few who still believe that the new president must be the one who has the largest number of votes. He is also for the extension of the time needed to finalize the manual counting of votes. Nevertheless he acted in such a way as to influence the Judge Charles Burton in the direction desired by the republicans. The law is interpreted in such a way as to favor the republicans.
Ron Klain (Kevin Spacey) He seems interested in the truth, we see this early on in the movie, he constantly repeats that the right to vote is fundamental in a democracy and every vote counts. Despite the fact that he is fired from the position of chief of staff, he stays with the campaign. He is the one who expresses the stake of their actions: is important to know the truth about the votes, but even he insists that the counting to take place in the most liberal counties in Florida.
Whiplash (2014)
...if you are interested in applied ethics
I will analyze the issues raised by this movie:
1.Career vs. Love
What do you do if you feel that you need all your time for your projects? Are you willing to discard your relationship even if there are promises of love? Are you willing to give up love to focus all your energy and passion in what you do? Time is a limited resource, if you have to choose between love and career what will you do?
2.Negative pedagogy
As a pedagogue, Fletcher (J.K. Simmons) is awful. I will not call in question his results (we are let to believe that he won a series of jazz competitions) but if you think at the overall picture, the number of people who left his classroom disappointed and with a ruined psyche you realize that he is a horrible teacher.
And now we can address the point at issue: there are such reasons as to justify the kind of behavior displayed by Fletcher in the classroom, his extreme negative pedagogy? There are fields of human endeavor in which it doesn't matter how many are spoiled if you manage to produce one who is the very best? Is it OK to force people beyond their limits with the intention to make them great if in the process the majority is wrecked?
Is it worth it to tear down a hundred reasonable musicians with the hope that one of them will become a great one, one who will make history?
Andrew Neimann (Miles Teller) asked a very good question: there is a line that once crossed has the effect of disheartening the next Charlie Parker? The answer given by Fletcher is very convenient: there isn't such a line. If someone is good he will put up with every kind of abuse. Practically he is giving himself a free license to behave no matter how abusive without the need to answer for the effects of his behavior.
I believe that this method is dangerous because you may choose to push someone hard at the wrong time making him snap, destroying someone who could have been the next great one. Even if you are extremely skilled and you pay a lot of attention to your student you may go too far and this will have a terrible outcome.
3.Motivation
How much rude and derogatory behavior is OK to endure, knowing that the abuse is making you better? Knowing that the anger you accumulate because of the abuse makes you give your very best? Is this the best way to energize yourself, submitting voluntarily as a target for rude and insulting behavior? What are the psychological consequences on your creativity? I presume that the goal is not only to become a virtuoso but also to be able to make your own music. Anger, rage are powerful emotions but are they the best avenue for energizing your will?