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WatershipBrakey
Reviews
Sex Education (2019)
Binged & tearful
I wasn't expecting this at all. I wasn't expecting this series to grab me, make me binge it whilst also needing a tissue at times.
As others have said, the first three seasons are close to perfect. The Otis/Maeve situation was getting tiresome towards the end with so many false starts making it feel forced. By the time they hooked up, I didn't feel she was ready for it and her heart was elsewhere...also by this time, I thought Otis & Ruby were perfect for each other. This kind of spoiled the 4th season for me.
Great characters, huge laughs, tears...the first 3 seasons had it all. The 4th was a mistep in my opinion and that's what drops it to 8. Otis became really unlikeable and only Ruby & Aimee had a decent character finish I think.
Recommended...just go into the 4th with lower anticipation. It's not GoT bad, but it's disappointing and the new characters suck.
Twin Peaks: The Return (2017)
Awful
We'll never know for sure how involved Mark Frost was in this but I doubt it was very much...because the plot takes up an episodes worth of time. The remaining 17 episodes worth of time was split between long shots of nothing, crappy music performances badly performed, awful special effects and dialogue so pointless only Lynch could have "written" it.
It's not Lynch's masterpiece. It doesn't take "risks". Why this even has the 'Twin Peaks' name attached to it is purely to get financing.
It's an embarrassing mess which neither continues nor progresses the story in any meaningful way. It's in there - hidden away in amongst all the nonsense - it's in there and it's about 25 minutes worth.
That's just not good enough.
Unfrosted (2024)
True...!?
It started with a quick search for Hugh Grant's character, then others...then historical characters started showing up. This was one hell of a fun film. It's true, but not quite. The characters are pretty much all real people and the story itself is based on a true story. Sure, you need to know your 60s American history, but if you do, you're in for a treat. JFK is genius. Kellogg is genius.
I genuinely wasn't expecting this - I'm no fan of Seinfeld - but within a couple of minutes, I was all in. A fantastically funny, irreverent, clever (really clever) film with some great performances. Simply, just enjoy it.
The Untouchables (1987)
Awful
I've honestly no idea how this git the reviews it did. Even though it's a true story, the film is an amateurish pastiche of true and it doesn't fly. The music is jarring, the performances are unbelievably lame, the dialogue is corny...there's nothing here I enjoyed at all. I mean, it's not my genre of choice, at all, but it still could have been a decent movie...it's just not, it's so bad.
Honestly, I don't get the point of it. Funny? No. True? No. Comedic? No. Serious? No. Well acted? No. Thrilling? No. It's nothing. I have nothing more to say other than I can't believe this won awards. It's awful.
Nashville (1975)
Um...
I'm not sure what I've just watched. It's an incoherent jumble of nonsense. It's a noise - the whole thing is just a noise of voices all speaking over each other, with intros to people so quick and pointless, it's almost impossible to follow who is who, what is what, and who is doing what and for what purpose.
It's 100% one of those movies people feel like they need to like and champion it loudly because they want to be a serious cinefile.
Well, sorry, but when someone's magnum opus isn't even as good as someone's worst movie, you know there too much pretentiousness involved in both making it, watching it and reviewing it.
Oppenheimer (2023)
Good...but should have been great.
A muddled first 45 mins which provides a feeling that in the hands of another director, this could have been an all-time classic. Several years were covered but the viewer had no idea how many years and which year was which.
The middle hour was excellent. It was paced right and insightful, this is another reason why the film suffers under the rush of the first 45.
The last hour was Ok. The conspiracy/twist/betrayal wasn't brilliantly handled but it was Ok.
All in all, I felt this was a missed opportunity. Murphy played the role a bit too underwhelmingly to the point where when they were talking about Oppenheimer being a womaniser, an egotist etc. I didn't feel like we'd been showed that character at all to that point.
I wish I could score it higher. I wish it was better.
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023)
Very Underwhelming
It had great reviews from both critics & the public. It has a great director. It has a great cast.
But it's not great.
Easily the worst GOTG movie and certainly it's a lower tier Marvel movie - I won't watch it again.
It's messy, it's basic & it misuses a great cast but it's worst crime is two fold - the music doesn't work & its jokes are old. Two things which made Volumes 1 & 2 stand out are the worst things in Volume 3. I barely raised a chuckle because I'd seen & heard it all before.
Yes, it pulls on the heartstrings with it's animal testing plot thread, but it feels out of place & doesn't actually let us into Rocket any deeper than we already were... especially given he's not in the movie very much at all.
Unfortunately, this is pretty lame at best. So long, Guardians, thanks for all the fish.
The Batman (2022)
Emo Batman
I mean, it's not a bad film per se. Elements of it are very Batman-y & I actually quite liked the Batmobile (even though it's not 66 or 89) but, oh lord, Bruce Wayne was awful. Really, really, awful. An emo Bruce Wayne, who is actually the most integral character of Batman, just doesn't fit. It changes the whole feel, the whole atmosphere, and the rest of the film wasn't quite strong enough to make up for the floppy-haired, gurning moron.
The actual detective side of it, the villans, and the main plot were pretty good but the finale fell flat.
A sub par finale coupled with an emo Bruce Wayne gives this a poor rating.
Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)
Girl Power!
For years we've been told women don't get a fair shot on Hollywood. Whether it's directing, producing, writing or acting....they're underestimated. Great women characters are out there, they say.
They are. Wonder Woman is a top tier character...but a woman writer & director have brought her down to a weak, shallow shadow of a character.
The whole film is based on two things - one is a woman's desire to look great in heels & tight dresses. The second is that, above all, a woman's main wish is to see a boyfriend from 40 years before...and then take an age to renounce that wish, making it harder to decide to save the world than send said boyfriend back into history.
It's so utterly, utterly, lame, that it ultimately culminates in an assassination of the Wonder Woman charscter...and lassoing clouds.
Absolute garbage.
Ghosted (2023)
Not Bad
Nowhere near as bad as some are saying...but it's not that great either. Some genuinely funny moments, some genuinely rubbish parts, some genuinely good parts. It's not going to win any awards, but if you've got a spare 90 minutes and like an action-y rom com, then give this a a go because there is far, far, worse out there.
IMDB would get much more use if they didn't insist on 500 character reviews - especially for movies that don't warrant 500 characters, like this one. It deserves 250 characters. Or 5 stars. Because it's really entertaininly mediocre. I should have used that as the title of this review. Entertainingly mediocre.
Avatar: The Way of Water (2022)
Stunning
Visually stunning. I can only imagine that in 2D or on TV, this would be a steaming pile of turgid nonsense, but on the big screen in 3D, there's little time to get bored as you get lost in the amazing - honestly amazing - visuals. Unfortunately, that's all it really has going for it. It's a nonsensical movie really, nothing of what happens makes any sense or progresses the Avatar universe in any meaningful way. I'll watch the sequels but, like the first, this was a one-time only viewing for me. I'd love for James Cameron to have a fraction of the budgets he has and look back to Terminator/Aliens for some new ideas about plots & characters.
Wednesday (2022)
Not Quite Wednesday
I'd have given this more had Wednesday stuck to being Wednesday. By far, the best parts of this are when she is being Wednesday. I don't care to see her have a romantic journey. I don't care to see her become popular. I just want her to be Wednesday.
As it is, I'm not sure where season 2 can go because she's now surrounded by friends, by people who love her. Her arch rival is now her friend.
All that said, Jenna Ortega makes an excellent Wednesday. Thing was brilliant. Fester was a highlight. I'm left wanting a season 2 but with slightly less enthusiasm as I would have, had Wednesday unleashed the piranhas again throughout the season. I'm hoping that S2 brings back Wednesday.
This Is Christmas (2022)
Christmas
I've given this a 6, not because it's not necessarily worthy of anything higher but purely down to what it is - a rather enjoyable Christmas rom com. It's not an Oscar worrier and it's not going to get BAFTAs but it's a decent Christmas movie and I enjoyed it. It's nothing out of the ordinary and there are far worse things to watch at this time of year but you won't be disappointed if you head into it knowing it is what it is.
It's a great cast & you know exactly what's going to happen (and it does) but that doesn't mean it's not a nice journey - I recommend it for a cold winter's night with a hit chocolate. Merry Christmas.
Black Adam (2022)
Awful
I have no idea what this was. The tone was off. The music was out of place. The characters were one-dimensionally boring. The plot was pointless. It has little to no redeeming qualities - it wasted Pierce Brosnan. It wasted Quintessa Swindell. It really, really, wasted Dwayne Johnson whose personality was hidden beneath layers of tedious characterisation which was trying to head down the T2 route but ended up missing the target quite badly.
The DCEU needs a serious review. Only Shazaam is any good, every other entry being a turgid mess and I had high hopes for this but they got the tone so badly wrong, no-one in the screening I attended knew when to chuckle or when not to.
Bad.
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)
Appetite For Asgard
I was filled with a mix of anticipation & worry about this film. Waititi has been weaving a wonderful path through the MCU but the advent of Jane Fonda/Jodie Foster was the big unknown.
I need not fear. This was a massive, colourful, mad, funny, quirky, Guns N' Roses video which made me smile all the way through.
Excellent casting, excellent cinematography, poor pacing at times, great dialogue. A very enjoyable, if inessential, entry into the MCU.
Top Gun: Maverick (2022)
Worth The Wait
Against my better judgement, I enjoyed this a lot. Great action scenes, not-too-boring character arcs, and a good cast. Jennifer Connelly was underused and/or superfluous to the story but that's really only a minor quibble.
Jurassic World Dominion (2022)
Just No
Peril after peril after peril...this film is exhausting without being either entertaining or thrilling. One minute a person is outrunning a dinosaur on foot, the next they're faster than a motorbike. It almost got going with the introduction of the original cast but that didn't last long and it went back to CGI nonsense.
Don't even get me started on the flaming locusts. We've come so far, technically, since JP92 but we've forgotten how to create characters and tell stories.
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)
Unique
Not a 6 but not quite a 7, purely from a rehwatchability point of view, but this is a solid entry into the MCU. I loved the horror elements, I loved Bruce Campbell...it was a great ride but I've always disliked Wanda's motives, for me they're just not strong enough for an otherwise great character (& actress).
The Illuminati? Brilliant :)
Looking forward to #3...
Meet Joe Black (1998)
Ruined at the End
The ending was really bad, solidifying the strange relationship the pair have - Joe Black couldn't have been more different to the dude in the coffee shop if he tried but still she went for it.
I really liked this film until the last 5 minutes.
Ojing-eo geim (2021)
Overrated
Overrated. Over long. Tedious. I've never sat through such rubbish in my life. Seriously. I cant even think of 150 characters of review to put here. Would have made a great 90 minute movie.
Home Sweet Home Alone (2021)
Nope.
Amazing cast. Horrible movie. It had promise but the falls, um, fall flat, the slapstick misses the mark and the premise is flawed. I really wanted to like this but just couldn't. They just need to leave this "franchise" alone now. 1 & 2 is all we'll ever need.
Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)
OK
This really is just Ok. The scenes with the Spider-men were well written but there were many moments of nothingness. A great movie is in there somewhere.
Dune (2021)
Tedious
In between not having a clue what people were saying, I was bored. It has a few good bits and pieces but, in the main, it's just boring and badly acted.
Petite maman (2021)
You Gotta Like This Sorta Stuff...
...if you're going to make it through the film. Zero soundtrack and un-natural dialogue ahoy, as is often the case with this type of movie, means this isn't really entertainment, it's "art".
Koyaanisqatsi (1982)
Unquestionably Tedious
Neither are the visuals anything to write home about or the music much cop.
I can only assume praising this "movie" has become a hobby of the pretentious because it contains nothing of any note and is a waste of 80 minutes of time.