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Agatha Christies Hjerson (2021)
Not a classic detective story, it's for children and YA.
I thought this was a classic detective story, but it turns out it is some kind of bizarre comedy for kids and young adults. It was marketed here in Sweden as a classic detective story in the spirit of Agatha Christie, it is not! Not sure what it is, but it is bad however you label it. 2*
Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous (2005)
Where's the Lysol? I need to rinse my eyes out!
I can only remember on other film that I have loathed more than this one, and that was the 1980's turkey 'Xanadu' featuring Olivia Newton-John. That is the only movie I have walked out of the Movie Theatre while there still was a good 30 minutes left of the film. Fortunately/unfortunately (take your pick) this film I rented at my local Video store when they offered three films for the price of two, otherwise I would forever be walking around with bruises on my legs from kicking myself for wasting money on something so hurtful and insulting to my intelligence and to my gender.
Okay, I have seen other films that have been bad, but I usually am able to find one or two redeeming facts about them that make me think that I have not totally wasted my time watching... If nothing else, I have at least been able to laugh at how bad they have been, but with this piece of trash, I cannot find a single positive thing to justify just throwing away a couple of hours of my life.
Sandra Bullock is no great actress, and the motive for watching a film featuring her have for me always been to see Sandra playing... eh... Sandra. Sandra is a beautiful woman that usually are able to give us, the audience, a few cute moments as she pulls her face and using her mimic to make us go, "aww" and "ohh". Sadly, she appears to have become a Botox addict as so many of her fellow Hollywood actresses, and throughout this film, all you get from her is bad acting and a stiff Barbie face with way too much make-up applied. On top of that, she plays an utterly obnoxious and unlikeable clone of Gracie Heart from the first 'Miss Congeniality' film, and I constantly find myself having to fight off the urge to throttle the character along with the director and the writers.
I really could rant on for quite a while about everything that is wrong and plainly insulting with this film, but I think I have already wasted enough precious time of my life on this rubbish. Therefore, I will not bother to mention the lack of plot, the total deficient of character development, the fact that this is a comedy that does not offer a single laugh, that this film has some of the worst casting in the history of films, and that this is a total turkey... No correction, this film gives turkeys a bad name.
I have learned my lesson the hard way, and after today, the name Sandra Bullock will never lure me into renting a video or trick me to walk into a Movie Theatre ever again.
If you are masochistically inclined, and the prospect of cringing for a couple of hours gives you a kick, then this is the film for you. If not, stay as far away from this as you possibly can.
Sandra, you owe me 115 minutes of my life back. Now, hand me the Lysol so I can rinse my eyes!
Mortes de préférence (2002)
Not bad at all... this is quite the brainteaser...
Okay, bear with me. It's the first time I'm commenting on a movie, but after watching this and seeing that there was no plot outline or user comments for this little gem of a film, I felt compelled to contribute.
This was originally made as a film in two parts for television, but after winning a prize at Cannes Film Festival, it has now been cut to one film and released on video.
Plot: Carole, a young woman gets robbed of her life, her identity and her children. As she wakes up at a hospital after a severe accident, she doesn't know what's happened to her or why everyone calls her Eva Sorrente. Nobody seems to believe in her memories of her husband and children. On top of that, the house she used to live in is empty, and all traces of her identity seems to have vanished. Then, suddenly, Carole/Eva becomes the target of an attempted murder, and at the same time a nurse from the hospital is found dead...
Comment: This is a beautifully filmed, brainteasing thriller starring a competent French actress, named Anne Caillon. I've never heard of her before and I'm relieved to say, that she isn't the typical, "oh so pretty" actress that I usually seem to find in French movies. This is not a thriller that will have you sitting on the edge of your chair in typical Hollywod manner. It's strength rather lies in the dialogue, the performance of the starring actors and in the absolutely stunning photo. The story itself, certainly have been told before, but this move adds a few twists and turns to the whole "amnesia" twist... The major twist being, that the amnesia-suffering character, doesn't really have amnesia at all, it's just everyone else who think she has.
I don't hesitate a second to give it 7 out of 10. Don't be surprised if you in a couple of years will see an American remake of this film... It will not be as good of course, and it will not have as intriguing dialogue and realism in the photo, and it will most certainly not leave you as pleasantly tickled as this little gem of a film left me. :)