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Reviews
Outrageous Fortune (2005)
Depends who's writing the script.
In the earlier series the writing is shared between Griffin and Lang, sometimes both contributing to the same episode. After a while it becomes clear that Griffin has a much firmer grasp of the crime elements in the scripts as well as the tensions that occur regularly within the West family as a result of the way they "earn" their living. The Lang episodes tend more toward the domestic relationships within the family and its acquaintances, and unfortunately the in later series the Lang contributions degenerate into mediocre soap opera with bouts of gratuitous violence. Of course there are other writers - the ingenious Tim Balme for one - but that's the way this cookie crumbled. That said, overall the entire thing is very entertaining, particularly the Griffin stories which can be spellbinding.
The Thin Blue Line (1995)
Execrable
Ben Elton has amassed quite a body of writing credits but the only ones that seem to be any good have been with collaborator Richard Curtis. On the basis of what I've seen of Elton's solo work, it must have been Curtis who supplied the comedy - you know, the material that actually makes you laugh. Because laughs are in extremely short supply in this awful tripe of a series. The cast is nominally very fine, obviously Rowan Atkinson topping the bill, the old bill that is. The police force - or was it service? - is portrayed as a bunch of losers and misfits, which could work had they been leavened with some genuine humour, but Elton had a cunning plan : he excluded humour. The result is that we witness not a thin blue line but a very thick one. A hard miss.
Mr. Rose: The Avenging Angel (1967)
Long review
It might be invidious to single out one actor in particular in a group venture like an episode of a tv series, but I intend to do that in due course. The plot sees Drusilla, Mr Rose's live-in secretary, get kidnapped while Mr Rose and his butler-chauffeur-assistant are away for a few days. A letter is left for Rose by the kidnappers, demanding not a ransom but telling him to go to a certain location. There is a (misleading) clue to the identity of the miscreant in the letter. Three or four times this process is repeated, and we see Rose being led from pillar to post as each clue directs him to a different location. In the meantime we learn than Rose, in his days as a senior detective, was responsible for the conviction, and eventual death in prison of a wealthy bon vivant, poet and occasional drug dealer. We are led to believe that his widow, a very wealthy American woman, wants Rose's blood, even though the events all occurred many years before. From time to time we see Drusilla in captivity, defiant and totally unafraid.
The widow had long since remarried a much younger man who had been sponging off her all the time. But he's tired of the situation, as is his mistress, and wishing to be rid of his middle-aged wife he decides to kill two birds with one stone. His dastardly plan is for her to murder Rose in front of a witness, whereupon she'll commit suicide in panic as a result.
Rose ultimately finds himself at a dinner arranged by the husband where the plan is to come to fruition. But the witness smells a rat and leaves, washing his hands of the whole affair. Undeterred, the husband relies on his wife's almost perpetual drunkenness and in a fir of rage she shoots Rose in the chest. We know that she has a loaded gun handy, and that she's a crack shot. He drops, apparently dead. Husband proceeds to terrify his wife, and she goes into another room to retrieve the gun and shoot herself. But Rose steps out of the shadows, tells her that he'd substituted real bullets with blanks, and the police force turns up.
I want to highlight the spellbinding performance as the wife of Joyce Heron, whom I'd never heard of before. I assumed, as did the American with whom I watched the show, that she was indeed an American because of the sureness of her accent. Not so; she was British. Her character was never at rest; everything was intense, deliberately so. Playing a drunk is very hard - I've seen 'great' actors botch it time after time. The only other actress that almost equaled Heron in this regard was Claire Trevor in 'Key Largo', in which she outshone Bogart and Bacall and Edward G Robinson. In fact, I think that she won an Oscar for her efforts. Heron was even more convincing.
Purely from an entertainment perspective this episode was good, even though Rose pursuing unexciting clues wasn't very stimulating in itself. Overall I'd give it an 8.
Lark Rise to Candleford: Episode #2.1 (2008)
Holiday fare?
Given that this episode was first aired on December 21, the "Christmas Season", it had a festive tone - in parts. It's worth noting, however, that the tone of the show overall is anticlerical. The portrayals of the overtly Christian characters are unsympathetic at best. Reverend Ellison, who appeared only in the first two episodes of the first series, was portrayed as an irascible and intolerant bully. He is contrasted with one of the "heroes" of the show: a "freethinker" or skeptic, who's the father of the young narrator. Ellison's mousy daughter cowered in her father's presence. Her character developed a romantic interest, which was reciprocated, in the only other person of faith in the show, a postman. Both were portrayed as stiff and awkward. When faced with the obligation to deliver mail on Sundays he offered his resignation; the postmistress yielded, implying that his ultimatum was a primitive throwback that was impeding progress. Personally I have no time for religion of any kind; but to deny that almost all the people living in place like Lark Rise (or even Candleford) would be anything other than god-fearing in those days is obviously grossly ahistorical
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Which brings us to this episode. Needless to say, there's no genuine religious element to be seen. No mention of prayer or church at all. A few perfunctory carols. The "spiritual" element is supplied by the presence of a ragged ghost which appears - or seems to appear - to most of the main characters. She's allegedly searching for her father, even though she herself died years before. Well, yes. She has, we are led to believe, certain powers of discernment and delivers home truths. The residents are baffled. There's some adulteration of the Jesus story; for example, at one point the wife of the freethinker invites her home and tries to wash and dry her feet, but they won't dry. Why? Don't know. Later she disappears into a lake, and there are echoes of Hamlet's Ophelia. Suicide? Don't know. Don't care, to be honest. The ultimate insult to the dominant religion of the country is that she's buried in a wood, with the local "wise woman" uttering some banal pagan chant. This "wise woman" is the substitute for the reverend, and invariably full of charms and incantations and claptrap of that kind. No Christian burial, then: at least in 'Hamlet' there was some semi-serious consideration given as to where Ophelia should be buried, as a possible suicide: in hallowed ground, or not. Not in this show. Ah, well. At least the production was well done, and the actors did a good job (aside from Julia. Sawalha, who can never get out of her own way, so as usual plays herself).
Nurse on Wheels (1963)
Almost good.
This film had everything you'd want in an early 1960s British Comedy except the essential ingredient: humour. The cast was part Carry-on stalwarts, but not the really funny ones. Other reviewers have described the humour as mild or gentle, which is true enough, but hopelessly inadequate if you expect an 80 minute comedy to make you laugh more than a couple of times. It was a crying shame to see the talents of the likes of Athene Seyler and Raymond Huntley wasted on a generally feeble script. It's fair enough to say that it evoked pleasant memories of an England never to be recaptured, but that's not really enough, nor should it be. Pity.
Outrageous Fortune: All That Fortune, Death and Danger Dare (2006)
Brilliant
This is the episode where the series moved from excellent to spellbinding. The strong characterizations having already been established, this outing ramped up the drama within the West family as well as dealing with two major plot themes: the extrication of Aurora from the clutches of the 'Horsemen' gang and the elaborate planning stage of a daring robbery to be executed during a high level gang summit, the cash being snatched from under the gangs' very noses. The consummation of these plans will take place in the following episode, another which rates as a 10. I really can't speak highly enough about the sheer quality of this.
Midsomer Murders: Dressed to Kill (2023)
Terminal decline
You know that a series is on its last legs when it plunges into the latest thing simply because it wrongly believes that it has a grasp of what its audience expects. Sadly it has utterly failed to appreciate the nature of its audience, which wants little more than a decent mystery competently delivered. I can think of several series over recent decades which have antagonized loyalists for this reason. Add to that the obvious tedium with the formula, verging on mockery, expressed in the exhibitionism of some of the actors, instead of genuine conviction, and you have a recipe for failure. It had a good run but is completely exhausted.
Angels: On the Mat (1975)
This episode was the first poor one in the series.
The writer botched the only significant medical issue in the show. An ex-nurse, who had been a nursing colleague of one of the trainees currently on the maternity ward, is herself a patient with a newborn healthy baby. But she's not got an untroubled relationship with her husband who's often away for work. She's bored at home, she tells her nurse friend, and shows no signs of bonding with her child. At one point she slips out of her private room for a recreation area for a bit of peace from the crying child. Irresponsible. She bitterly regrets the decision to leave her profession for marriage. The trainee, meanwhile, was in a potentially knot-tying relationship with a doctor and has high hopes for future matrimony. Her friend sours her on that prospect. Whether the script was part of anti-marriage agenda may or may not be the case, but such ideology also helped add to the underpaid workforce.
The egregious medical blunder in this the script sees the trainee tell the patient that (as both know, though the patient blinds herself to the possibility) this is likely a case of post-natal depression. Incredibly she tells her that if the physician prescribes medication, she should absolutely take it and the problem will resolve within 24 hours. I kid you not. Almost every adult has surely known of a mother suffering from this ailment, and it can months or even years to get better.
Until now the shows have been more about the nurses than the patients. In this one the balance was skewed a bit the other way and it did not enhance the episode.
The Good Life: The Wind-Break War (1976)
Puzzled
I fail to understand why this episode seems to have been a favorite. Tom Good, almost invariably an obnoxious and narcissistic character, outdoes himself in sheer nastiness, targeting his usual victim, his neighbor Margo. The final quarter of the episode demonstrates that it's difficult to act drunk; not even Paul Eddington (Gerry) can pull it off, and the other three are hopeless. The most convincing drunk I can recall on tv was the character called Otis Campbell on the Andy Griffith Show, who had cracked what is obviously a tough code, beyond even most otherwise talented actors. The script is typically slightly amusing with about three laugh-out-loud moments, so par for the course.
Poirot: Three Act Tragedy (2010)
Fair to middling, minus one
I've never been a fan of Martin Shaw. Even back in his "The Professionals" days he was outclassed by Lewis Collins. I saw him in a couple of episodes of Inspector George Gently and later an episode of something where he was a judge. The problem is that Shaw never inhabits a character. You can always see the moving parts, a man pretending to be someone else. In this Poirot outing he's worse than ever. Fake accent, poor facial expressions, stilted speech. He must be a brilliant colleague because as an actor he's an almost total failure. That aside, the show itself isn't half bad. I should know by now that if Shaw is in something, it's a definite avoid.
Broadchurch (2013)
Whodunit
If you're looking for a mystery to watch, and expect some intelligence from the police investigators, you'll be disappointed. As a mystery it has two fatal flaws. One, the culprit emerges out of the blue near the end of the final episode, no clues at all having been provided that they might be guilty. Two, instead of the show being enhanced by a bit of police ingenuity, the culprit comes right out and confesses because he's fed up of "hiding". Except he's not been hiding.
So what you have is a routine crime drama masquerading as a mystery. And the investigative team is thick. Many red herrings, each pursued until they fizzle out under the weight of their own irrelevance. A couple of pointless subplots to extend the series to eight episodes.
The show might have been redeemed as a two part drama. As it stands, four out of ten, because the actors were good despite the material.
Shoestring: Find the Lady (1979)
Decent episode
Pretty good plot, but the episode was badly damaged by some truly putrid 1970s music, loud and pretentious, raucously performed by Toyah Wilcox. That occupied about ten minutes all told. The story revolved around a beauty queen, music and narcotics with ensuing violence. Christopher Biggins was a duly sinister Mr Big, and Lynda Bellingham, whose career improved by being in All Creatures Great and Small, appeared in a minor role as a perennially failing model. One interesting sidenote is that Shoestring's boss at the radio station had received an award for a documentary about the proceeds of the slave trade in the city -presumably Bristol. In 2020 protesters toppled a statue of Edward Colston, who'd made much of his money from that very trade.
Seven out of ten.
Chain of Events (1958)
Carry on Blackmail
The director of this movie, Gerald Thomas, played a major role in the development of the Carry On series of comedies later in his career. This effort could have been one of those, so farcical was the trajectory of the plot. Meek bank teller avoids bus fare, gets caught out by the conductor and inspector, gives false name when pressed, leading to the wrong man being in the dock. It's stated in the court that the two bus company employees were adamant in their identification, yet the real perpetrator and the wrongly accused bore not the slightest resemblance to one another, except they both spoke English and wore suits. One quite tall, the other short, loud versus softly spoken, confident versus sniveling. To make matters even worse, and further to insult the intelligence of the viewer, the bus conductor subsequently catches a brief glimpse of the real culprit and identifies him immediately. There are more idiocies as the film progresses though none as egregious. The actors are good and obviously needed the work. The writers should have been ashamed.
Mission: Impossible: Action! (1967)
How?
While I wouldn't presume to add to the excellent review at the head of this page, I ought I think at least register my disappointment at the denouement of the episode. As usual a couple of problems confront the team. The final one entails Barney getting hauled off to Secret Police headquarters when he's discovered in the basement, which is not part of the plan. Yet he has (spoiler) the crucial roll of film. This is an insuperable obstacle for Rollin but hey, this is Mission Impossible and out of the blue Barney shows up right where Rollin is ! With the film ! No explanation for his escape, nothing. What a crock of a finale.
DCI Banks: Playing with Fire: Part 1 (2011)
Episode One
The listing on imdb is inaccurate; this is actually the first story in the series. It could and should have been so much better. Even if you've never watched a police procedural you could guess that a pathologist would be present at a suspicious death. There are three such deaths in this episode and not a pathologist in sight. Needless to say none of the senior police has heard of backup. Of course the main problem is Banks; if your main protagonist is constantly dour, you need some kind of humor to relieve the mood, yet it's almost entirely absent, probably because of the deficiencies of the writer. Even Morse was occasionally susceptible to humor, and his relationship with Lewis sometimes generated sparks. Sadly in this episode the persistently insubordinate sergeant was almost invariably mouthy and unpleasant, and she should have been demoted within five minutes, as should Banks for slapping a member of the public because of something that didn't concern him.
Positives were the impressive conflagration scenes, but that's about it. The plots had potential but they were wasted because of a poor script and the miscasting of Banks.
Town on Trial (1957)
Too many deficiencies
A failed attempt at a hardboiled police whodunit obviously modeled on American movies of the day, hence the two American actors. Charles Coburn's great talent was wasted on his redundant role, and the less said about the thespian skills of his niece in the movie, the better. John Mills was a subtle actor whose forté was the minimal gesture, so he was miscast as the tough "cop" ( a word never used in 1950s England though ubiquitous in the film). There was no skillful deduction, so the guilty party simply confessed! Of course he had no motive for the murders, but that would have been too demanding of the screenplay. It was perhaps watchable for the occasional uplift of seeing some well known actors in small roles, which isn't compensation. Had it been a drama of jealousy it would have been more likely a success; clothing it in the garb of a mystery was a blunder.
The Rockford Files (1974)
Remarkable
You have to hand it to Stephen J Cannell. Somehow he got a studio to make this pilot episode a two-parter lasting about 90 minutes when there was barely enough material for a half hour quickie. The opening seven minutes was deadly slow, and only the eventual appearance of Rockford enlivened proceedings. Lindsay Wagner as the damsel gave about as tepid a performance as you can imagine. No character except the caricature villain, who would have chewed the rug if asked, was at all memorable. The solution, which Rockford somehow guessed without a scintilla of a clue, was silly and rushed. There were a few gratuitous chase scenes, a bit of gunplay which were so blah even then. Thank goodness the shows improved generally after this stinker.
Sergeant Cork: The Case of Ella Barnes (1963)
Sweatshop
The moral of this rather mediocre episode can be summarized as "sweatshops are bad"; but we knew that already. The "murder" mystery fizzled out, and the solution lasted all of five seconds right at the end. It seems as if the writer had a sense of moral outrage but little conception of how to pace a crime drama. The acting of most of the non-regular cast ranged from average to execrable, aside from the wealthy lady who was a proto-suffragette; she was excellent.
A Bit of a Do (1989)
Acquired taste
I know that the writer, David Nobbs, was earlier in his career a prolific creator of jokes and sketches for some of the most popular comedy shows on British tv. Yet his brand of situation comedy - I'm thinking of his Reginald Perrin series - and dark comedy, like A Bit of a Do, are off the beaten track of traditional comic fare. Not necessarily the worse for that, of course.
Although the nominal stars are David Jason and his inamorata Nicola Pagett, neither of them shines in their role. Jason struggles with a convincing Yorkshire accent, and loses the battle. His range of both speech and facial gesture are sorely limited. I realize that he won a major award but can't understand how. Pagett, meanwhile, lacks comedic talent. She's a good dramatic actress but isn't funny and can't deliver a comic line. Her laugh is excruciatingly amateurish.
The show is sustained by its supporting cast, which (the annoyingly whiny Gwen Taylor as Jason's wife aside) is almost uniformly excellent. Paul Chapman is brilliant as the rejected husband. David Thewlis brought a certain star quality to a role that didn't give him much to work with. But for me the absolute standout was Stephanie Cole as family friend Betty. Almost invariably teetering on the brink of inebriation she brings acute forensic skills to what she observes and isn't reluctant to let everyone know. Her equally susceptible husband played by Tim Wylton, chicken producer extraordinaire, is almost as terrific.
I have to admit that I didn't much care for Reggie Perrin despite the genius of Leonard Rossiter. But 'Do' has a better script, is more imaginative and boasts fine performances from many participants. Eight out of ten.
Skyfall (2012)
Not an unqualified success
Early in the movie M (Judy Dench) says "Sounds like a bloody waste of my time". My sentiments exactly. Plot holes galore, motivations and pacing way off, climax anticlimactic. It's true that I've never been convinced by Dench in any movie role at all, and this is no exception. She's completely over-parted as M, never having pinned down what makes M tick. She's so ancient looking she should change her name from Dench to Dentures.
Craig is as vacant as ever, a muscle-bound cipher Bond. Fiennes is bland, Kinnear equally lacking in personality (his Dad was much funnier).
An expensively produced drag, unfortunately. If Dench's M had been the least bit invigorating one might have taken an interest in her fate. As it is, one is compelled to say that it's a mystery how she ever got the job.
Sergeant Cork: Case of the Public Paragon (1963)
Excellent
Beautifully plotted and paced, outstanding despite obvious commercial limitations. Character emerges from the plot, rather than the boring reverse. Touches of humour relieve the drama. A pleasure to watch.
Lewis: The Quality of Mercy (2009)
Another near miss from Alan Plater
Plater has a knack of writing episodes of crime series that are almost good. The production per se is typically excellent, but as a police investigation it's a ridiculous flop. The hotel fraudsters yield to the most delicate questioning and admit guilt. Worse still, the murder culprit tells Lewis where the incriminating laptop is at the end of the show while under no duress whatsoever. Anyone else would ask for an attorney instead ! Sheer dramatic ineptitude by a writer out of his depth.
There are also several technical problems of which I'll mention just one, the plot element hinging on academic plagiarism, or more strictly fraud. In this instance a "dropout" from the University wrote someone else's literature Ph. D. thesis for them. Since he'd have "dropped out" as an undergraduate, the idea that he'd have been intellectually equipped to write a high level doctoral dissertation is utterly preposterous. Also, every doctoral candidate has a supervisor who would have seen through the subterfuge in a heartbeat.
An unfortunate development is the way the writers have tried to turn Lewis into a mini-Morse. The most incongruous misstep is saddling Lewis with bouts of seething anger, an emotion alien to his earlier personality. A sellout if you ask me.
On the Up (1990)
Mediocre
The writer, Bob Larbey, never seems to have managed to drag himself out of the rut of bland comedy. Typically this one raises the occasional mild chuckle but if you like the occasional uproarious laugh, or actual wit, or even broad humor, you'll invariably need to look elsewhere. The leading actors are all seasoned professionals but even they can't redeem this one.
Murder in Suburbia: Witches (2005)
Witchcraft in high school
Any time a murder mystery features witchcraft you can guarantee that it's going to be garbage and this was no exception. Poor script and crummy acting by the "teenagers" made it impossible to salvage. The amusing subplot involving the accident-prone boyfriend couldn't redeem it. 4 of 10. Worst episode in a usually entertaining series.
Between the Lines: Nothing Personal (1992)
Just decent
Not a very distinguished episode in a generally entertaining series. Young man falsely accused, but unaccountably refuses a solicitor while in custody, which is laughable and undermines the credibility of the balance of the show.
There's also a continuing plot line about wrongdoing in a police van. It's like a tedious millstone around every episode and really needs to be resolved because it's dragging the show down.