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Lonesome Dove (1989)
3/10
A True Horse Opera
8 April 2005
The only reason I'm writing this is to counterbalance some of the positive reviews. I sat through this picture because I had read somewhere that it limned the Charles Goodnight/ Oliver Loving story; however, with the exception of the amputation (historically, Loving's right arm), there is nothing here that qualifies as history. There are so many pre-40s Westerns that are better than this--just look at practically anything Ford made. His Calvary pictures were accurate in every detail. Not so, Lonesome Dove. But that's a cavil. The problem is that the writing is mundane and the directing is mediocre and uninspired. Of course, condensing such a long book would have to be a challenge, if not an onerous task. And in many places (as is the case with the character--played in an 'over the top' manner--of Blue Duck), the script wanders away from the original source material. This is truly DuVall's picture; all eyes are on him. He has the best scenes, the best lines; when he's off-screen, everything suffers. To say this is the 'best' or 'greatest' Western ever made is to display a serious deficit of interest in the genre; it only serves to reduce the values of Westerns, as well as dumb down a potential audience. This was a television movie, a shaggy dog tale, a mini series that had to fill a niche. This is not great Art, much less is it great cinema.
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Brain Donors (1992)
1/10
Awful!
15 February 2005
I never do this (in fact, this is my first time), but I read the glowing reviews and bought the VHS and watched it...and it was awful. A sad, pathetic attempt at humor, seriously miscast and poorly written/directed. The pacing is turgid, the 'fast paced patter' is...well, awful. It makes those of us who love the Marx Bros (which means the mindset of the 1930s) cringe; you can't bring back what's gone. This is a vapid attempt to revive a sensibility that died over 70 years ago. Watch it if you want; in fact, my copy is for sale.

If you really want to watch something funny, why not try one of these: Funny Bones (with Jerry Lewis); The Cat and the Canary (with Bob Hope); My man Godfrey; Along Came Jones (Cooper); The Big Liebowski, and The Nutty Professor (Jerry Lewis again), just to name a few.
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