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josephmoore_74
Reviews
Epic Movie (2007)
If someone ever tells you Epic Movie is funny, you'll know they're as inbred as the British monarchy...
I try my best not to pay attention to other people's opinions about a film before I watch so I am not prejudiced against it. So having ignored any reviews and having seen just the trailer, I happily sat down with a friend to watch EPIC MOVIE expecting a few chuckles. Well maybe I should start paying a bit more attention to reviews because if I ever needed proof that you can't polish a turd...
And what a turd it is! Older actors who really should know better (Fred Willard, Crispin Glover & Jennifer Coolidge), younger actors with faces you really want to slap (ESPECIALLY Kal Penn & Adam Campbell), Tony Cox playing the same wise-ass midget black guy character he plays in everything else you've ever seen him in (guess what - it still isn't funny!) and of course those dreadful musical numbers...this thing stinks like a Florida election result! Out of the whole movie I remember laughing ONCE, and whatever it was that made me do so couldn't have been that great, because I can't remember for the life of me what it was! The only other mildly entertaining moment was the naked chick coming out of the wardrobe...
I see some reviewers have said EPIC MOVIE isn't as bad as DATE MOVIE. I beg to differ. DATE MOVIE had a few reasonably funny moments and the always enjoyable Alyson Hannigan, but EPIC MOVIE is absolutely terrible! It really is! I just can't stress that enough! All those other reviews saying it sucks the proverbial balls are right on the mark! My friend was very, very annoyed with me for making him lose 60-odd minutes of his life (and rightly so) but I sat there the whole time thinking "It's gonna get funny any minute now, surely?" but then all of a sudden it's over! And although the short run-time is a bit of a rip-off, in retrospect, it's probably a good thing.
A big thank-you to the reviewers of IMDb for confirming it's not just me - this movie both sucks AND blows. Stay away from it. It could be more detrimental to your health than the video from RING!
Visions... (1972)
Kick-ass!
I saw this film on TV in the mid-late 80's and thought it rocked. All I could remember was that some guy had scary visions of bombings and murders, and when he looked at someone he had had a vision of, the screen sort of shattered like a mirror. At the time I thought this most impressive, especially for an old TV movie. It has always stayed in my mind and I wish that it would be shown again on mainstream terrestrial TV, instead of the pap that we are currently being served up!!! But I would disagree that Hollywood should do a remake, because big budget remakes suck - I give you "Psycho", "The Italian Job", "Starsky & Hutch" etc. although if they did, let's see Vin Diesel in the Telly Savalas role. He's got the slaphead for it!