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Moonfall (2022)
Could have been brilliant.
Unfortunately their first half of this film was severely rushed - massively lacking in fleshing out all the characters so you don't really care about them.
The second action half was a conglomerate plagiarism of a couple of books by the Sci-Fi author Iain M Banks.
Don't let the film put you off - the books it ripped off are sublime.
Feersum Endjinn. 1994
Matter. 2008.
Fury (2014)
Infantile Nonsense
Tanks do not operate without Infantry Support.
- Unless it's required for a vacuous remake of (fort apache/the alamo/assault on precinct 13) -delete as pleases you. I hate it when accountants make jingoistic movies and this one is the worst. Absolute rubbish, not a single redeeming fleeting moment. I could have got some laundry done instead of wasting my time on this.
A Bridge Too Far it is not.
Trolljegeren (2010)
Worse than Plan 9 from Outer Space.
This is the worst film ever made.
I suspect that the overwhelmingly positive reception of this movie is either; 1. A marketing exercise to see just how far hype can triumph over substance, 2. Mass hysteria and a surefire sign that humans are a danger to themselves and others or 3. A gigantic online joke at my expense.
Out of 8 friends, I was the only one to watch this to the end. I persevered for one reason - so that in future, If I'm watching a really terrible film and thinking about switching it off or leaving the cinema I can say to myself; "no, you can do this, you've watched Trollhunter".
Prometheus (2012)
Profound.
Profoundly Disturbing.
Usually at the end of a Film the cinema starts to buzz as people stand up and start to leave, chatting about the movie, where they are off to next and so on. At the end of Prometheus, every single person sat staring at the screen in silence.
The humans in this film are not the good guys. They are largely irritating, hugely forgettable and generally disposable. This is discordant and is unsettling to watch, but this masterful depiction of David the robot's adventure in space is chillingly good.
It's not particularly scary and not particularly gory, it's not very enjoyable. Just disturbing. Prometheus is not the best film ever, but it is the best film in years.
The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff (2011)
Surreal literary wit.
A tutor - Miss Tightclench tells her pupil's mother; "She will be starched to rigidity!". If like me, you find this clever and amusing then you will enjoy The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff. If you don't, then you won't.
I loved the referencing, the visual imagery, the casting to a man, I found the diction especially enjoyable - I've never read any Dickens but if the general opinion that this is a nod to him is anything to go by, I am sorely tempted.
My only criticism would be that the writers held back a little, maybe thinking their comedy wasn't mainstream enough. If they make any more then hopefully they will really let rip!
Joyfully disregarding the lowest common denominator. Give me more.