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Stowaway (2021)
Unprecise and unnecessary
Wow - i do not know where to begin, but this movie is wrong in so many ways. This is not a space movie, it is just a cheaply written, seen-before pseudo-drama which has been placed in a space setting. And then we have all the physical facts what are just plain wrong. Hollywood must think that the audience is dumb and uneducated. Just a single example, among dozens: if there is artificial gravity onboard the space craft, created by rotation of the craft, then there is NO WAY that the persons would have the Earth view that is shown several times during the movie. The persons would have to be standing with their feet on the window though which Earth is seen, in a 90 degree angle to how they are positioned in the movie.
Terminator: Dark Fate (2019)
Do not come back!
The first Terminator movie brought a groundbreaking concept, T2 was both mind blowing story and an amazing production. And then, that should have been it!
I know, I know - movie making is a business and there is an industry with workers, company owners, franchise owners, investors, and also an audience which all demand more. But that industry should go have not exploited the value and goodwill generated by the first two movies. That industry should instead have been spending its resources on making EITHER other low-quality movies maximizing profits while feeding the masses with who-cares action content, OR developing truly new franchises which can form a platform for great movie experiences in the future.
Star 1, awarded: because you have to rate a movie with at least one star.
Star 2, awarded: Some great action scenes.
Star 3, awarded: The combo of Linda Hamilton and Mackenzie Davis is brilliant, defining a new type of character, handing over the torch from one type of accidental hero to another type of purposed hero.
Star 4, missing: Arnold: why, oh why?
Star 5, missing: I do not smoke weed, so I was not able to logically grasp part of the plot.
Star 6, missing: Heavy use of classic Hollywood cliches. Do not to that, what were you thinking? I guess that having Tim Miller onboard was not helpful keeping cliches at bay.
Star 7, missing: Skinny and boring plot, predictable behaviour by the main characters.
Star 8, missing: What is up with the T-800 ("Carl") getting soft on its own existence and on humans?
Star 9, missing: Redefining the franchise by repeating it (Legion instead of Skynet) bears witness of zero imagination, artistic creativity, and respect for the true believers of the original franchise.
Star 10, missing: Cameron, Schwarzenegger, Hamilton: how much more money do you need to make? Is soiling your artistic legacies worth just to make this extra money?
Speed 2: Cruise Control (1997)
When continuity does not matter at all
Sadly, time does not always heal all wounds. This movie is so full of examples of poor continuity and mis-representation of physical facts and common sense that it is just plane ridiculous. This movie was wounded from day 1, and it still is.
Precious Cargo (2016)
When Hollywood dumb gets even dumber
This film is living proof that even a celebrity impact like that of Mr. Willis has practically zero impact on quality or story line.
Having a bunch of nonames on the cast is not disqualifying, but if zero artistic value or even potential is brought forward, there is little to none to say in favour of this film.
This film is as trivial as it gets. it is composed of components and stereotypical elements which are either long-know or sooo predictable to a Hollywood "who-gives-a-xxxx" production.
Mr. Willis: make sure that your brand and legacy matter better in the future.
Oblivion (2013)
Fantastic plot - weak TC repeat
The plot and the setup in this movie is fantastic. What a scenery! The aliens, the human underground army, the duplicates, the entire narrative is mindblowing.
But there is too much Tom Cruise repeat here. We get it - the Ray Bans, the abs, the running, the low flying, the use of machine gun type of air-to-air weapons (really?!).
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (2014)
Nothing short of boring
This film is ld wine on new bottles. It reeuses the usual elements of a Hollywood maximum-profits movie: them-versus-us, valor, pride, hatred, revenge, leader-loyalty, treason, hope, and love. Also, this film is an insult to all the indigenous peoples ever portrayed by Hollywood, as the apes all speak and behave in a way that has usually been used to portray non-Western communities. Throw in a couple of celebrity actors, toss it a few times, and you have a blockbuster. Do NOT waste time, intellect, or money wathcing this film.
Thor (2011)
Ridiculously poor movie
The cast is very good but that is about the only thing the elevates this movie above zero. Hollywood seems to have long run out of meaningful artistic development, and watching "Thor" is like drinking old wine from new bottles. This plot has NO-THING to do with Nordic mythology, and the plot could easily be adjusted ever so slightly to fit any super hero myth. Watching Hemsworth's acting is like watching an involuntarily serious episode of "Black Adder", Hemsworth's character behaving and speaking like a medieval nobleman. With the making of the "Thor", mankind has irreversibly lost valuable time. Movies like "Thor" is an intellectual and artistic vulgarity, created solely with the purpose of maximizing profits.
Sharknado 2: The Second One (2014)
Disgraceful
This film has a couple of pretty heavy actors in the cast. But it is a waste of Western civilization to watch it. The plot is trivial, the dialog is corny, and the acting is extremely poor. Continuity is non-existing, and the entire movie is haunted by clichés and random unconnected incidents. If is was intended to be a comedy, it failed. If it was intended to be an adventure movie, it failed. If it was intended to be a science fiction movie, it failed. Apparently, anything goes artistically as long as the box office is pleased with the turn-out. Using washed-up has-beens and failed wannabes does not make a great movie. If this film and the other Sharknado films set the standard for modern and future TV movie entertainment and film-making, we have nothing to fear, be it war, the clash of civilizations, global warming, or alien invasion - we are doomed anyway.
Thor: The Dark World (2013)
The ultimate sell-out - artists falling from grace
Watching this movie represents an all-time LOW in my life as a consumer of mass entertainment products. This movie clearly is one big predictable run for profit for the movie company, director, and actors: nothing but clichés in every aspect and detail, cheesy dialog, silly sound effects, pretty faces, buff bodies, over-dramatization, stupidity, and the list goes on and on and on. This movie is a travesty, a cartoonist's public rape of Nordic mythology for money. This movie is sucking up to a well-mapped audience which has no care for quality, as long as they get their 10 minutes of something cool to tell their friends about. By being in this movie, Natalie Portman, Anthony Hopkins, Rene Russo, and Stellan Skarsgård have tripped and fallen from any and all artistic grace that they have earned over the years. Shame, shame, shame.
The Avengers (2012)
We get it - animation is here to stay, and so are the stereotypes
First the positive side of things: People eat bread, so somebody has to bake bread. People drive cars, so somebody has to manufacture cars. Peolpe watch movies, so somebody has to make movies. Good for them. Now for the actual review: If watching train wrecks is one of your favorite hobbies AND if you are generally star struck, this movie is a must-see. The entire plot is a lot of nice computer animations covering over a veritable train wreck of predictable - yet quite often inexplicable - events, actions, and cheesy comments. And the cast is eminent - if celebrity and not exercised talent is the 2012 definition of eminence. A Danish movie director who has had fair success in Hollywood was once asked what it took artistically to make a blockbuster movie. His answer: "Understand that the average viewer is male, 12 years old, and moderately gifted. And understand that there has to be something good, something bad, something awesome, and something pretty. The rest is less significant." Well, this movie has it all, here are some examples of the stereotypes: Heroes=good. Aliens=bad. Fighting=awesome. Scarlett=pretty. If you don't want to spend an hour and a half getting stupider, go watch 3 episodes of Friends, The King of Queens, or something else which is at least mediocre. And my final comments: Shame on you, Samuel; Shame on you, Robert; Shame on you, Gwyneth; Shame on you, rest of cast.
The Last Stand (2013)
Really?
I know that Arnold is ARNOLD, and that is what made me spend a Saturday evening on this movie. But I was greatly disappointed. Having actors like Whitaker, Guzmán, Stanton (a pleasant surprise), and others in the cast did not compensate for a hail storm of clichés, predictable events, and seen-before action scenes. From the initial small-town-feel-good build-up, over bad-guy-kills-innocent-man, over bad-guy-gets-spectacularly-sprung, over over-powered-car-is-cool-yeah, over dumb-cops-loose-track-of-car, over FBI-officers-behave-arrogantly, over small-town-cops-decide-to-make-a-stand, over pretty-lady-cop-is-a-crook, over you-earned-the-deputy-star, to the final that-is-what-happens-when-you-park-in-a-fire-zone comment, nothing surprises the viewer. Suffering from a nearly non-existing plot, this movie was clearly designed to maximize profits by addressing the 12-18 year old male viewer. I sincerely do not hope that this was Arnold's farewell movie - his exit should be a better one that this movie. Really!
Con Air (1997)
What were they thinking?
This is one of the worst movies that I have ever seen. Not even the host of grade A actors recruited could compensate for this true holocaust of simple and predictable story, continuity mistakes, poor and greatly exaggerated special effects, stereotypical characters, unrealistic events, overacting, corny dialog, unmotivated events, etc. The movie has zero artistic value and the only entertainment value is that of self-ridicule. Clearly it was made solely for the purpose of profits. If you liked Speed 2, you will probably like this movie, too. If you like a consistent story, solid acting, and a good plot, do NOT waste even one minute on watching this movie.
The Death and Life of Bobby Z (2007)
Continuety issues and poor acting
Expecting a Tarrantinian type of experience, I was greatly disappointed with this movie. Not even the talented Laurence Fishburne could elevate the cast's overall acting performance to mediocrity. The rest of the cast demonstrated rigid, theatrical acting in a Charlie's Angels's style train of semi-connected events. The plot suffers from stereotypical characters like the bad cop, loser-turning-into-an-honourable-"doing-the-right-thing"-man, evil latino mafia boss, and cynical drug dealer. Several goofs scarred the movie as well. Eg. when Bobby Z jumped into the water right behind the moving boat, he jumped in the white stir created by the boat's propeller. When he crawled onto the boat, it was not moving and the water was calm.