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Reviews
The Midnight Meat Train (2008)
Awfully made movie, do not watch
The idea of this movie/storyline is not bad. But it's execution is awful and poor.
I'll start with Vinnie Jones acting and the initial scenes with him, cutting up his victims. His acting is so awful, that the setup of the entire movie for the first 30 minutes, was so off the mark. Wooden, poor acting, too much gore etc. Everything just looked so amateur. And put your off from the get go.
I was trying to understand, why is Bradley Cooper in this movie? Because it took 45 minutes to be remotely interested in the movie. I wanted to switch it off.
Unrealistic. Gets a little interesting when the GF breaks into the butchers home.
And then the execution of the "reveal" was poor. The make up and special effects where awful. Like a uni project. Not scary, just tacky. And the ending was rubbish.
Honestly, please just don't want this. There is nothing good about it. Not even Bradley Cooper.
Poor Things (2023)
Who's stick did the director polish off?
I don't understand the hype for this movie. I like arty independent films, but this was just weird. And tbh, was just heavily focused on the sexual abuse (surprise surprise!!) of a woman.
I kinda get there is a story of her discovering the world, but this all hinges on her being highly sexualised. Despite not having the mental maturity of a woman her age, she is just taken advantage of. That is really what you walk away with as a feeling, after watching this movie.
What is the message of this movie? Men just wanted to take advantage of women? The director likes to see a women be poked by multiple men? There was just no strength or take away message to this women's character. That's what's so baffling. Yes she wants to live and learn, but at the expense that her only existence hinges on orgasms. It's a degrading movie.
A demeaning and demoralising storyline. I'm also surprised no one has pointed out Mark Ruffalos awful english accent. It was a joke tbh.
Sets are interesting, but that's literally it . Don't waste your time watching this.
Extinction (2018)
Meh....
Disappointed with this movie. Once you realise what this movie is about, it is really disappointing. The concept is different, but no one would ever, ever, ever root for a movie, where humans loose out in the fight for survival.
So it's a meh for me, because I do not want to watch a movie, where the writers want us to root for robots taking over the earth, while humans are relegated to Mars. It's a silly concept. It's a brave one, but no. I am not rooting for the robots.
How are us humans supposed to connect with the robot characters? They don't have a brain, heart, REAL feelings etc etc.
So I don't think you should watch this movie.
La sociedad de la nieve (2023)
Excellent movie
I remember watching "Alive" when I was a young teenager. And I didn't realise "Society of the Snow", was telling the same true story, as "Alive", until the movie had finished. But my god, this movie is excellent and well executed.
When it was over, I remember thinking scenes that stood out for me in "Alive" is when they have to eat those who had passed away to survive. But "Society of the Snow", didn't place so much focus on the grim parts of the truth. Yes it forms a large part of the story, but what I really liked about this movie, is how it was more than a disaster/survival/shock factor movie.
It is a movie about strength, a band of brothers, hope, sadness, love, so much emotion at the end and I just can't explain, this movie was so deep. I wasn't expecting it. (I dunno, maybe because I'm hormonal right now lol). But as someone else described it in another review, it really is about the "human spirit". So much strength to survive and you feel so, so sad for the ones who did not make it.
I guess you can put this down to excellent character development and story telling, in such a confined way. I didn't even realise the movie was 2.5 hrs long. I didn't get bored once.
Surprisingly excellent movie.
Saltburn (2023)
Massively overrated! Good acting, poor story execution
I watched this after reading the hype and it is massively overrated. All over Twitter I heard about the "vampire" scene... I was expecting a vampire. All over Twitter I heard about the "burial" scene... I was expecting some kind of epic murder madness. There was nothing of the sort in this movie.
I guess that serves me right, making assumptions. But it's nothing major. The down fall of this movie is actually the fact, that we don't get an explanation, as to why Barry Keoghan, is the way he is.
What are his motivations? Why is he, the way he is? What happened in his life? Why does he not like his parents? It's clear he is a psycho, but WHAT is the story of his character? Etc.
This movie has really good acting from all the cast - Pike, Keoghan, Eloridi, Oliver. The cinematography is great. The sets, music. But the story just falls flat in the last third of the movie.
Didn't anyone in the entire family wonder, why are bad things happening, since Barry turned up? Was Barry's character bisexual, or just psychopath?
We just got no background on the main character.
This is also marked as a thriller and psychological thriller, but it is not. It's just a drama mystery.
The movie was disappointing tbh. I didn't get to the end of the movie and think "wow". Just that this is average and doesn't deserve the 7.2 rating. The motives of Oliver are just not explained, given the amount of destruction he causes to this family.
At least we get some closure on Glenn Closes' character in Fatal Attraction! She wanted him! What was Oliver's motivation? Did he want the money, murder, power, to be Felix, or he just hated his parents?
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023)
Much better than expected and pleased as an Indie fan
Just watched this movie a few months after it came out. I saw the reviews were mixed, which is why I put it off, but honestly, I don't know why people were disappointed...
As an Indie fan, I have high expectations and this movie does please in all areas. Firstly, I am happy this movie retains the darker vibe we feel in "Raiders of the Lost Arc" - (I know some people didn't like this?). I also like the Nazi theme. And given Indie's age, he does not overly exert himself, his character is realistic for his age.
I think Phoebe Waller Bridge is a nice addition to the franchise too. (I would have liked to have actually seen more dry British humour, but maybe this was toned down for an international audience).
I was worried the story around the artefact they were chasing, would at some point unravel into a mess, (like the last movie), but it didn't. And I have to say the ending made me smile, it was cute and I loved seeing Indie end his stint embracing with Marion.
I guess "Raiders of the Lost Arc" holds so much nostalgia for me, but I enjoyed the small sprinkles I saw in the movie.
The only thing noticeable, is that Steven Spielberg didn't produce this movie. But all in all, I'm happy Harrison's final movie was produced at a good standard, it's entertaining, has a good storyline and keeps you interested.
Definitely worth watching.
AVP: Alien vs. Predator (2004)
A fun Alien movie in franchise, which has aged well
This movie is a thousand times better than Prometheus and Alien Covenant. Why? Because it is everything those movies should have been and were not.
I remember when this movie came out 19 years ago, I enjoyed it, but I thought it was lacking something. I guess I thought the premise of Aliens creatures vs Predators, was off putting for me. The genre was moving from horror to fan-boy porn. And at the time, it didn't appeal to me.
But having set through the abysmal Prometheus and Covenant, the last through years, this movie has aged excellently.
First off, the action in this movie is fantastic! The creatures look great, the fight scenes are entertaining and tbh the storyline, given the premise, was really well pieces together! Combined with the sets, for example the moving pyramid, as well as some decent casting - Sana Lathan, Lance Henriksen and the guy from resident evil, this was a creative movie. It is an excellent popcorn Alien movie.
And one of my biggest gripes with Prometheus and Covenant, is the cast made stupid mistakes. And they had ZERO IQ. In this movie, most of the cast are not dumb.
So 19 years later, in my opinion, this movie has really moved up the Alien ratings board. Possibly number 3 for me, after Alien and Aliens.
It's a great example, of how Hollywood 20 years ago, was still original.
Like I said above, this movie is all round entertaining and has aged really really well. And I think it deserves higher than the 5.7 rating it has. At least 6.2/6.3.
The Mother (2023)
Simple and entertaining formula...
Watched this movie after reading "The Mother" was the most watched movie on Netflix in 2023.
Firstly, I'd like to say the misogyny in these reviews is pathetic. I read one which stated something like, "Nikita redone for the 100th time"!? I'm surprised to read that, because there are thousands of action movies out there, with the same basic formula, led by the same cliche male action hero, but god forbid a woman playing with guns!
I will agree with some of the reviews, the formula of this movie was nothing new and basic. But the execution of the movie was decent. Jennifer Lopez is 54 years old and she did a great job, playing a retired army veteran! She also did a good job chasing, killing bad guys and loading up her gun well!!
The fight scenes were not John Wick level. Perhaps some people were expecting some fancy art house fight scenes. But it's pretty standard. But tbh, this didn't disappoint me. The movie is more about her trying to protect, DEFEND and keep her daughter safe. Not to go on a bloody rampage.
In summary, this is an enjoyable movie to watch. It is easy to follow, not heavy, not gruesome, has good acting and it's fun to watch Jennifer at 54 years kicking ass. She should continue doing these kinds of movies, as she did a good job. I highly recommend.
Don't watch this, if you're a 50 year old man or a jurassic boomer, still horny for a "First Blood" type movie.
One of the comments I saw mentioned in some of the reviews, more than once was, "look at her make up, it's so unrealistic she'd never wear make up in the snowy woods!". WTF. It's movie, get real! I wish I saw more scrutiny of male action heroes and how unrealistic most of their scenes are in reality.
Time Trap (2017)
Lazy script but great sci-fi concept
I just watched this movie on Netflix, had never heard of it and wanted to rate it anywhere between 5-7. 5 because I initially found the acting a bit wooden sometimes, but then I realized that's because the script/dialogue is a bit poor. Like it was written in a rush.
But I really liked the concept of this movie!! In a world of remakes and Marvel and Star Wars spin offs, I live to see an original sci-fi concept and that part of the movie was well made!
A bunch of kids get stuck in a cave, and every day spent down there, thousands of years pass on earth. Will they ever make it back "home"? Not that there's a lot of special effects, but what the had were decent, not high budget, but still you can tell, they stretch their money as far as they could.
So I gave this movie 7 for the storyline, originality and you should almost see this as an independent sci-fi movie. At times the acting can be cheesy, but I did really enjoy this movie and concept and I think it deserves the 7.
The Crown: Aftermath (2023)
Propaganda for Charles
I don't understand why the writers have portrayed Charles as caring for Diana, these last few episodes. We know he loathed her, disrespected and cheated on her, their entire marriage. They even lie in this show and make it out, that he cried beside her dead body in Paris. He did not. They do not state, that the Queen flew him there, as well as her sisters.
The acting by Debicki and Abdall as Diana and Dodi, is perfect and amazing!! I loved watching them together, but the writers have literally chosen a storyline and tone of voice, which was not reflective at the time.
I don't know why they have tried to make Charles out to be some kind of angel. And we all know the Royal Family hated Diana was dating Dodi. On top of that, stating that Mohammed Al Fayed forced Dodi to date Diana, is also a lie. This was not even rumoured at the time in the media. In fact, I clearly remember rumours of an engagement and pregnancy. (There is no smoke without fire). So this story is not factual, almost feels like a lie, purely to discredit Mohammed Al Fayed and I am baffled as to why the shows creators have taken this narrative. (Fayed was even kicked out of the country).
The ghosts scene was also odd. Writing has lost its way. And West sounds and acts NOTHING like Charles.
Evil Dead (2013)
Gripping horror
I watched this movie not long after it came out. And I've just watched it again for a second time today. I still think it's an excellent movie!
I never watched the original, it came out way before I was born and any references I've seen to it, always looked "cheesey". So I always avoided it. I guess this is where the generational divide comes in.
There's a lot of "negative" reviews for this on here. But it's from the die hard fans, who clearly were expecting a remake of the original.
It is not really a remake, but a new take on the original. And it's made really well. Basically an entirely different movie. So why don't you treat it as that.
The acting is good from all the cast, they have some level of IQ, (where a lot of characters in horrors these days don't!), strong/creepy atmosphere, which gets you further than cheap jump scares and a decent storyline.
Overall, I really liked this movie, as it has the perfect ingredients for a great horror. The suspense and atmosphere and acting is just what really makes this movie.
A couple of things didn't age well. Such as the scene where the girl gets possessed and some vines go up between her legs. I'm glad to see in 10 years, society has evolved to find these things more tasteless in movies. But other than that, it's a good watch.
Noise (2023)
Really bad writing, do not watch
I don't understand the point of this movie. It follows a man who is investigating a mystery on behalf of his dad, who is in an old people's home with dementia.
The guy realises the factory his dad worked at caused deaths. He starts seeing ghosts. He wants to find the bodies, but then the movie ends.
Absolutely NOTHING is achieved in this film. I don't know how this got the green light and I don't know why Netflix produced this movie. It is badly written.
At times the main guy is just on the screen too much. Talking to himself and doing nothing. Literally the storyline of this movie does not wrap up. Just does not make sense to me.
The only thing I can think, production ran out of money. And they though, let's end it there and see if anyone watches.
AVOID. Don't waste your time.
The Fall of the House of Usher (2023)
Ignore reviews from die hard book readers
I haven't read the story by Edgar Allen Poe, but judging from the reviews, apparently the story of this show deviates away from it.
But as a newbie and someone not familiar with the original story, I really enjoyed this show! The show's style and atmosphere is very Mike Flanagan. And the storyline itself is good and interesting enough to follow.
And brother and sister make a pact with a stranger, which leads their life to riches. But at a cost...
It's not horror, there are a few jump scenes and I do like most of the characters. Each episode follows it's one story, so you get hooked in pretty quick.
Definitely give this a shot! It's easy watching and I binged it in 2 days. It really is NOT as bad as some people are saying. I guess this is a stand-alone take from the book.
Fair Play (2023)
Really good movie!!
Don't give up on this movie after the opening scene, it was really random. But does not actually reflect the remaining 98% of the movie. And ignore the negative reviews. Also this is not the Wolf of Wall Street.
This is a really enjoyable Wall Street drama, with a good level of suspense which builds up every 10 minutes! The end of the move is nothing like the beginning. So give it 20 mins and you'll get into it. The pace really speeds up about 2/3s in.
Basically a couple work for an investment bank and the girlfriend gets promoted. The boyfriend cannot hide how distraught he is inside, that his GF now rolls with the big boys, parties like a big boy and makes money like a big boy. And that he doesn't.
This is a reality for a lot of women still in the world. The hypocrisy, that a man could be a breadwinner, but not the women. Even though women have the same skills and ability to do the same job.
Highly recommend! And Phoebe Dynever does a really excellent job in this role. I wasn't a fan of Bridgerton, but this really showcased her acting talents. I'll be watching her future movies now.
Great casting all round. Just a reminder, this is a drama, that picks up momentum into a faster paced thriller.
Great movie and easy watching too.
The Neon Demon (2016)
Not horror, but whimsical drama
This film was disappointing, mainly because it was marketed as a "horror, thriller, cereberal, suspense" and it is definitely not any of these. It's marketing was misleading and as a result, people's expectations will be hugely different to what the movie actually is.
It's basically a whimsical drama. Nothing really happens for the first 1hr and 10 mins. Then we get 10 mins of necrophilia. And about 10 mins of light violence and gore.
I actually didn't mind most of the movie. It is visually stunning and it is an "art house" movie. It is not horror at all. The acting is good and vibes sometimes touch upon a Twin Peaks style.
But by the end of the movie, I had no idea who or what was the Neon Demon. So this is why I've rated it 5/10.
I get the movie it supposed to depict the industry in an arty way, but there was so much which needed to have more clarity.
Nefarious (2023)
Misleading trailer... not scary or horror
This movie is not bad at all. The acting is relatively decent and the storyline is unique from what's out there. But it's not a horror at all, more drama and a little suspense.
I'm slightly disappointed as the trailer depicts a different type of movie... more fast-paced and more horror. There's even a line where the prisoners says, "by the end of the day, you would have killed 3 people". That doesn't really happen as you would expect it too. It's silly and misleading. And the movie is nothing like the trailer.
It starts off well for 20 mins and then I started to fall asleep. As the movie is literally mostly 2 men having chit chat in a room. And that's it.
For this reason, I can not give it higher than a 5. It is a drama.
Also as a non-Christian, I did not find this movie Christian propaganda. That's just nonsense. There are heavy Christian references in the movie. But nothing unusual!
10x10 (2018)
Lewis should have been killed...
It's not often you watch a thriller, where you want the villain to come out on top. And you want the victim to be killed.
If you abduct someone, lock them in a padded room and then try and get them to confess to a crime, you deserve to be dragged through the mud.
I really liked Cathy's acting, she was great and played her role fantastically. But you really struggle to connect with Lewis and his story and motive.
I don't want to reveal too much, but there is a lack in story telling there. And you really don't care about him. In a way, I rooted for Cathy all the way. Despite what she had done.
Good acting from the lead, but story telling was average and not thrilling.
Black Mirror: Mazey Day (2023)
A really good episode, but lacking the tech theme...
So far this is one of the best episodes of the season. It has good tempo, good acting, a surprising twist that no one saw coming and the tempo increases quickly towards the end. It has Hollywood vibes, because it's filmed in LA and about a famous actress.
But the only thing lacking is the technological element. I can see from the reviews, this is why the episode was rated lowly. A Nikon digital camera is not as intelligent as "when tech goes wrong", as in previous seasons.
But it doesn't warrant the downgrade in ratings. It was a fun episode to watch and a damn sight better than the Salma Hayek episode, which was boring AF and overrated.
Overall, an excellent episode, but lacks on the general black mirror theme. But we have already seen this in season 6. I hope they return to their roots in S7.
The Idol (2023)
Let this be a lesson to Sam Levinson
And The Weekend. Times have changed, generations have moved on. Boomers are getting older. And half the worlds population is pretty much Millennials, Gen Z and younger.
We do not want to see this tripe.
We tolerated Euphoria for the acting and representation. Not because we enjoy watching the abuse and over sexualisation of women. Enough is enough.
I'm glad your shallow exploitative show got destroyed epically. It was awful and not reflective of the direction we are evolving. It was cringe and tacky and the sexualisation was too much.
In a broken world, we do not want to see broken content.
The Clovehitch Killer (2018)
Good movie, ruined by a lame ending...
This was an enjoyable movie to watch, right until the last 10 minutes. It's a slow burn crime drama... I wouldn't really call it a thriller. But the acting is good from the two young leads and the serial killer/dad.
The storyline is more emotional, than suspenseful and about how a young boy suspects his father used to be a serial killer, after finding lots of credible evidence around the house. And how he knows, if how's mum finds out who she really married, it would destroy their family unit.
I thought the storyline was generally well handled. But I'm a little disappointed that in the end, he doesn't get arrested. He isn't punished for his crimes. And it didn't even clear, exactly how his life ends. Does his son kill him, or does he kill himself???
Why leave it on a cliffhanger? Your watchers are just annoyed and will look back at this movie, as the one that didn't even have a proper ending.
I'm be rate this 7 for the storyline, acting, drama/suspense, evidence unraveling... would have been an 8 if the ending was better.
Silo (2023)
The first few episodes are slow, but it picks up...
I read the reviews during the first couple of episodes of this season, because I too was worried about the pace of this show. But you do need to get to episodes 5/6, before the story really picks up.
The storyline is decent, but the first 4/5 episode a number of characters are introduced and lost. I get the are setting up the story, but some of the characters were poorly written. For example the storyline about the sherif and his wife wanting to have kids, was just not needed. It didn't add to the story and just really stalled your interest in the overall series.
However, Rebecca Ferguson IS the main character and her story does not really pick up until half way through the season. As well as Common and Tim Robbins.
So to enjoy this show you need to get to episode 6 really, that's when the suspense picks up and you start to actually want to know what the Silo is and missing pieces to the puzzle are start to be put in place.
It's a nice easy watching show to watch. But it started off really really slow. So just give it a chance. It's different and enjoyable.
Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023)
How can get attention in the media?
Well I'll just take a beloved decades long childrens character/s and turn them into sadistic demented murderers.
The directors clearly did not plan to make anything decent from this storyline. He could have made a fantasy, drama, even a comedy, but chose to really tarnish some innocence and sell that as a movie.
If you don't want to grab attention through sexual abuse in movies, just poison a childrens icon.
Nonetheless, I went to watch this movie, thinking maybe it might not be bad. There is nothing good about it... bad acting, boring lead ups/death scenes, poor writing and poor prosthetics.
There's is literally nothing decent about this movie, sorry.
There's a review claiming this is "supposed to be like a B movie!". B*tch please... all they tried to do is make a quick buck with no imagination.
And that's all the movie is, no imagination.
Please watch scream 6 instead, if you want a fright this weekend.
The Last of Us: Long, Long Time (2023)
Unexpected (like San Junipero!)
I never played The Last of Us, but I was always aware of the game and that a show was upcoming. As a big fan of Resident Evil games and zombie movies, I really couldn't wait to get started on this show. But much like Black Mirror Season 3's "San Junipero", I was not expecting this episode!!!
What a beautiful and well acted side story!!! The first two episodes were obviously great, but also dull and dystopian due to the nature of the story. But throwing in this love story randomly, really emphasises strongly the messages of this episode!
That love has no boundaries! Even in an apocalypse!!
Beautifully shot. Beautifully written. Beautifully acted. Beautifully heart breaking.
I know the raging homophobes are having an aneurysm, but please get over yourself. It's one episode, in an entire show.
The Favourite (2018)
I'm gay and this just falls flat...
I wanted to watch this movie, as it has an lgbt theme and I'm here for the representation. However, the storyline of this movie is just so stale, boring and flat...
It just seems like someone wanted to make a lesbian themed movie and they just whipped up some random storyline.
It's unrealistic, uses cheap gay baiting thrills and the characters are just uninteresting. The whole thing is just whimsical nonsense and it just feels like director wanted to see 3 women going down on each other. And that's it.
Pointless, no moral to the story, no substance in the writing or character development. Avoid. There are better movies.
Blonde (2022)
Another movie to show the abuse of women
It's not rocket science that where there is money, there is abuse, coercion, intimidation and a lot of bad seeds at the top of the chain, taking advantage of others. The movie industry, music industry, TV industry, worldwide...
We all know Marilyn had a difficult private life and was clearly abused and taken advantage of, but this movie does absolutely nothing to showcase what she was good at and why she shined so bright.
It's just a poor excuse to see a woman being abused repeatedly by men. And showing those sex abuse scenes were unnecessary. This movie is a perfect example of what still happens in the industry... exploitation to please the male gaze.
Although Ana is a great actress, this movie has no substance, other then to be an x-rated half baked/half fake biography.
It's 2022, Gen z and millennials don't want to see this crap anymore.