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Hereditary (2018)
A very brilliant family drama turned into an inhomogeneous, forced horror mess
When all the critics decide to super-hype a movie and call it our generations' The Exorcist, and basically declare it a scariest movie of all times, a person tends to form certain expectations. And these expectations were, in my case, pretty damn high.
And I love horror movies. Everybody loves a good jump scare, as do I, but my favorites usually tend to be the slow-burning ones.
So this, naturally, seemed perfect.
Hooooowever.
What I got, was a brilliant hour and a half of family drama (a genre I normally tend to avoid, really not my cup of tea) spiked with horror, and when I say horror I mean some genuinely horrifying moments - not the supernatural horror kind of horrifying, but actual-real-life-horribly-awfully horrifying - with amazing Toni Collette seemingly losing her mind, and the whole thing is so awesomely done you are almost ignoring the fact that, well, the story isn't really going anywhere, although the film uses a pretty classic form of storytelling, and the story IS supposed to go somewhere, anywhere really, or, you know, maybe even nowhere, and just leave you right where you are, asking yourself wtf just happened, not that I'd like it after the whole Exorcist hype, but... but the one thing you really don't expect, the thing that becomes painfully obvious in the last half an hour or so, is that it will quickly and irreversibly go down the idiot lane, and just end there, wanting you to believe that it's where it was supposed to end all along, when in fact you know that somebody just used footage from another movie and photoshopped main actors' heads there, because the producers lost the original ending in a terrible accident and just lost their minds and decided to pretend like nothing happened, and instead of postponing the air date, reshooting it and giving us the ending we, and this movie, truly deserved, they did THIS.
Giving it a 6 because the family drama was done WELL.
The horror might have been interesting too, unfortunately I have only seen the ending and some 'clues' that were equally forcefully introduced earlier, and it seemed kind of over-the-top, but you never know, the rest of the movie could've been OK.
I just wish I saw a complete movie. Either of the two.
Revenge (2017)
Wonderfully executed, refreshing and funny
This is most definitely not a movie for everyone, and seeing so many reviews saying it's unrealistic, with bad acting, plot holes and poor character development, just goes to prove it. I believe certain inclinations towards gory B movies of the past is needed in order to fully understand what's going on, but everyone open-minded enough (and with a, shall we say, distinct sense of humor) should be able to enjoy it.
Incredibly funny and well shot - some of the scenes are so brilliant they're just instantly cult. The soundtrack is amazing, too.
Coralie, the world needs more of you!
The Expanse (2015)
Stellar!
Well this will be one obsolete review as by now pretty much everyone agrees this is probably the best sci-fi TV show of today, and the ratings seem to prove it. I'm also a few years late. However, I've had like a sip of wine and it just crossed my mind once again how awesome this show is, and how happy I am in general to witness the amazing sci-fi television achievements of today, with film technology finally catching up with the awe-inspiring ideas this genre has been giving us since its conception. I. Am. Happy. Have been miserable approx. ever since Battlestar Galactica ended, whining how there hasn't been any decent space sci fi on television for ages, and all of a sudden I got this, and several other decent shows followed - for crying out loud, we have like TWO Treks going on right now!
So anyway. I have no idea what happened to Syfy channel, who got fired or hired, or whatever, but something changed there a few years ago, and for the better. They actually invested money in televising a contemporary, groundbreaking sci-fi story, and they did it WELL.
I haven't read the books, bought a few of them of course, but read? Nay. However, the story shown on the TV series is intelligent, complex, and more than anything, DIFFERENT, in the best way possible. Season two finale left me baffled, amazed, excited - and happy. And that's what this scheisse is all about.
Thank you everyone who participated in writing this and bringing it to small screens for all us lazy bastards to see. We are forever grateful. Thank you. Thank you!!
Cheers!
La noche del virgen (2016)
Laughed my ass off
Yes! God I loved this! Seen it at a film festival and it made me literally cry with laughter on more than one occasion. Such a silly, over-the-top, disgusting gore-fest, I enjoyed every minute of it, starting with the main protagonist's teeth, and all the details of his romantic pursuit which gets him.. well I'm not spoiling the (really) grand finale, but there are some scenes you ain't believin' till you're seein'.
Most definitely not for everyone but do watch this if you're into Spanish horror/cinema, gore and don't mind that special kind of nasty, offensive, at times absurd - wish I could call it toilet but it goes beyond that - humor.
Awesome. Hopefully this finds a distributor soon.
Cheers
Star Trek: Discovery (2017)
Cry me a river, y'all
Wow, I don't think I remember seeing THIS many butthurt reviews for an instalment ever. Seriously? Crappiest show ever made? Sweet bejesus can you guys get any more pathetic?
I've loved Trek since I was a kid, meaning I was raised on TNG, watched all of ST since, so not exactly an outsider to the Trek universe. The first two episodes left me mildly surprised as I was expecting a bit more gritty, modernised version of the show. Although the acting felt extremely wooden, and I didn't really like the lead, AND I wasn't exactly crazy about the whole Klingon war premise, I still wasn't disappointed.
But, boy did E03 deliver! Y - E - S! That's what I want to see in Trek of today. And when I get nostalgic for the good old super positive and squeaky clean Trek (again with a sweet little modern twist), I have the equally amazing Orville. All the while waiting for Expanse S03, Black Mirror S04, etc. Jesus, what a time to be alive! We've NEVER had better sci-fi shows on TV, let alone this many at once. So quit bitching and ride this amazing wave while it lasts!
TL;DR First two episodes good, third episode awesome, hope it continues in this manner.
8.5/10, giving it a 10 because seriously guys?
Cheers
Dig Two Graves (2014)
Great cinematography, not so great direction.
Oh, I did not like this one.
It started well, I loved the aesthetics, camera work was great, and the actors were doing a great job. Nice story too! However, I'd say the director made some pretty dubious decisions here as the whole thing started looking quite amateurish quite soon. The editing, for instance, felt just plain wrong a lot of the time. Also, some important parts of the story felt rushed, and some totally unnecessary scenes were kind of forced in. It just felt like a good story poorly translated into cinema, and I couldn't shake that feeling until the end.
This movie has rather big ratings among the film critics - and from what I can see here, the common mortals loved it, too. I have no idea why. Oh well... you can't always agree with everyone. 3 stars from me because (although it was great in many regards) it flunked in the most important aspect. Cheers!
Patient Seven (2016)
A very entertaining Halloween anthology type flick
I'm so glad I didn't miss this one due to poor reviews!
Yes, it's far from revolutionary, and it isn't super scary, but it does have that awesome, spooky, kind of old school charm to it. Honestly, in the seas of pretentious horror crap with pathetically weak story lines, this simple yet entertaining 7-piece has an almost soothing effect. It WOULD'VE been awesomer if they pushed that clichéd oldschool angle a bit further, but it works just fine the way it is.
Some of the sequences are downright 100% awesome, some don't work that well, but overall it never gets boring. I see many complaints about the main story, but that story is basically just a glue to tie the 7 shorts together, and it works more than well in that regard.
If you love Halloween anthologies as much as I do, you'll probably like this one, too. Give it a go. If you have older/teen kids, invite them as well. Cheers!