Reviews

I loved this movie as a kid in the 90s. I couldn't say how many times I've seen it. A safe bet would probably be more than 20. However, I hadn't watched it in about 15-20 years. There are lots of movies I loved as a kid that don't hold up too well when viewed as an adult. This one is still a whole lot of fun to watch even today. Surprisingly, the special effects are still pretty damn good. I've watched some 90s movies more recently where the special effects looked awful and distracting by today's standards. I can't say there was any particular scene in The Mask where I thought the effects were noticeably lacking. This movie does not take itself too seriously. It is basically a live action Looney Tunes cartoon. This could easily come across as obnoxious and dumb, but this film really pulls it off in the best possible way. Jim Carrey was perfect for this role. I can't imagine anyone else as The Mask. I also loved the use of music in the film. The song and dance numbers are highly entertaining. Overall, The Mask is just a really fun movie and anyone that enjoys those old Looney Tunes cartoons should have a good time watching.

8/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy looney tunes super powers, really smart dogs, nice guys that can't catch a break, bumbling cops, douchebag gangster villains, 90s henchmen, condom jokes that go over kids heads, sexual innuendo, breaking the fourth wall, atomic wedgies, anally intrusive consumer feedback, swinging dance numbers, conga lines, ass biting, head p*ssing, bomb swallowing...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: 10+

I was not looking forward to this movie at all. The first three DC Extended Universe films were all poor entries into the superhero genre. I can't say that I enjoyed any of them. Batman V Superman was OK, I guess. It had some good things mixed with a lot of crap. One of the positives being Wonder Woman. I thought Man of Steel and Suicide Squad were both pretty crappy. Based on this track record, I was not in a rush to see Wonder Woman and kind of forgot it was even coming out. Then I saw some online buzz from some sources I trust indicating that this film was actually really good. So I decided to go see it and I'm glad I did. This was a very entertaining, well made superhero epic. I felt the pacing of the movie was great, taking time to develop the characters and the world they inhabit. Most of the action sequences were very well done. Also, the film does a great job of incorporating humor without feeling forced. I think this movie was pretty successful at making me buy into the mythology, which could have come across as too silly, even for a superhero movie. My least favorite of the Marvel films are the Thor standalones, mostly for that reason. The only real negatives I had were with the less than compelling villains and the big CGI fight sequence at the end. I've kind of grown tired of the big laser, lightning, fireball exploding green screen fight sequences in these movies. I enjoyed the more, literally, grounded, well choreographed hand to hand, sword, arrow, gun battles that came earlier in the movie. Overall, if you like fun fantasy adventure films, you'll probably enjoy this movie quite a bit.

8/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy strong kickass female characters, Xena Warrior Princess Island, Captain James T. America, gas sniffing German Bane, German mad scientists, phantom of the opera mouth, crotch grabbing, lie detecting lassos, awkward pillow talk, rag tag teams of misfits, female vs male, female vs bullet, female vs gun turret, female vs tank, female vs top of building...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

I love a good mind bending film with a non-conventional narrative structure. Films that challenge the viewer to figure out what exactly is going on and what it all actually means or represents. It's not enough for the movie to just be odd and confusing. The real test for these types of films is whether I feel engaged and intrigued by what I am watching. This film definitely captured my attention and held it from start to finish. The closest comparison I can think of would be David Lynch films, which I am a huge fan of. If anything, Upstream Color has a more straight forward narrative than the more surreal Lynch films like Inland Empire or Lost Highway. You can go through the movie and follow what is happening, for the most part, while piecing together what it all means. At the end of the film, you will want to go through the movie in your head to form a conclusion about what exactly happened and how you interpret the film, both narratively and thematically. If you go into a movie expecting it to spell everything out and come to a gift wrapped conclusion, you probably won't enjoy this film. If you like movies that require the viewer to draw their own conclusions, this film might be right for you.

8/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

I have been watching the Peter Sellers Pink Panther films in order recently. I didn't really enjoy the first Pink Panther that much, but I did have a lot of fun with A Shot in the Dark. This third entry, Return of the Pink Panther, was decently amusing, though not as enjoyable as A Shot in the Dark. This film has some funny gags and Peter Sellers does physical comedy with the best of them. He also turns up the outrageous french accent to deliver some hilarious lines. However, the slapstick is also turned up to more ridiculous levels, which I felt didn't work as well as it did in A Shot in the Dark. Overall, this is a decent slapstick comedy that should provide some laughs.

6/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy cartoon intros, clumsy french policemen, outrageous accents, mispronunciations of the word "Monkey", breaking things, spilling things, ripping things, blowing up things, suctioning things, tripping over things, falling off of things, falling into things, getting stuck to things, personal stealth karate- boy personal trainers, eye twitching, defective home furnishings, racially inappropriate language...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

I very much enjoyed this film. It is full of humor, relatable characters, and heartfelt moments. The tribute/parody films made by the characters were hilarious and definitely spoke to my inner film nerd. The film transitions from being very lighthearted to a more serious tone in the later part of the movie. However, this change was gradual and came across naturally. This film is cleaver with its use of humor and tasteful with its use of sorrow. It doesn't come across as sappy or cheesy when the emotional moments occur. Overall, I highly recommend this film for anyone looking to laugh and/or cry.

8/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

I recently watched the original Pink Panther film and came away feeling disappointed by it. It was an OK movie, but I didn't really find it all that amusing or compelling. However, this sequel to The Pink Panther is very entertaining with plenty of laugh out loud moments and colorful characters. Peter Sellers really shines in this role of the bumbling detective. Reminded me of Frank Drebin from the Naked Gun movies. I would assume Jacques Clouseau provided some inspiration for that character. I felt that the slapstick gags in the first movie came across as forced, but they work really well here. Overall, this is a fun movie that should keep you entertained from beginning to end.

7/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy cartoon intros, clumsy french policemen, breaking things, spilling things, ripping things, burning things, tripping over things, falling off of things, falling into things, personal stealth karate-boy personal trainers, death by gun, death by throwing knife, death by blow dart, death by poison, death by garden shears, nudist colonies, eye twitching, ankle biting, unreliable timepieces...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

I hadn't seen any of the other Pink Panther movies before this one. My understanding was that they were goofy slapstick comedies staring Peter Sellers, who I knew from Dr Strangelove, which is one of my all time favorite movies. However, this movie was more of a romantic comedy with some slapstick and situational gags thrown in. Most of the jokes didn't really land well for me. I felt like I had seen these jokes done much better many times before in movies that have come out since The Pink Panther. Probably the only two gags I got a kick out of were the men hiding in the room and the gorilla mirror. However, like I said before, I've seen these jokes done more effectively in other movies. Apart from the comedic aspects of the movie, I didn't really find the story, characters or dialogue all that compelling or interesting. Combine that with a lack of many laugh out loud moments and I would have to say I found this movie disappointing. On the other hand, the biggest positive to come from this movie would have to be the iconic theme song. Anyway, I wouldn't say that this is a bad movie, it just isn't that good, in my opinion.

5/10

Recommended for those that enjoy cartoon intros, clumsy french policemen, suave womanizing cat burglars, manipulative female seductresses, breaking things, spilling things, tripping over things, falling off of things, unreliable door handles, high speed costumed pursuits...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

This is a fairly fun, entertaining movie. It has lots of memorable moments that many will have seen referenced throughout pop culture. I did not see this film as a kid. If I had, I probably would have been pretty freaked out by it. However, watching for the first time as an adult, I can't really say that any part of this movie was particularly scary or creepy to me. It came across more like a fun spookfest than a horror movie. I would say this is closer in tone to something like Beetlejuice than it is to The Exorcist. I guess it's somewhere in the middle, which probably makes me give it a lukewarm review. Not creepy enough to be that scary. Not goofy enough to be that funny. I felt the beginning had that sense of wonder that you get from a Spielberg film. I know he didn't direct it, but you can definitely notice his influence on the direction of this movie. However, that feeling seemed to disappear along with the daughter. Overall, this is a pretty good movie that you can have fun with. Just don't go in expecting something scary.

6/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy creepy children, creepy clowns, creepy trees, creepy tvs, creepy meats, creepy self stacking furniture, spontaneous face melting, spontaneous grave popping, spontaneous house folding, inter-dimensional closet portals, giant closet heads, ectoplasmic mud baths, remote control feuds...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

Man, this movie is painfully cheesy and lame. Over the top macho machismo mixed with godawful corny romance. The worst of both worlds! I'm all for cheesy 80's movies. I love Roadhouse for it's over the top ridiculousness, but Top Gun is just painful to watch at times. This movie is clearly aimed at immature teenagers of the 80's. Since I was an immature teenager of the 90's, I can't really relate to this movie. I'm sure people that were 80's teens probably have a nostalgic tie to this movie, much like I have to some 90's movies. However, judging this purely as a film, I'd have to say Top Gun is not something I would recommend to anyone looking for a quality movie to watch. There were a couple moments of unintentional humor that made me laugh out loud and the aerial action scenes are very well done, so I'll give the movie a few points for that.

4/10

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By the way, is it just me or is his lady friend kind of an a-hole? His best friend just died and she's grilling him for being a quitter! Jeez, maybe give him some time to figure his sh*t out, seriously!

Recommended for those that enjoy the DANGER ZONE!, hot shot renegade pilots who live by their own rules, by-the-book authority figures, super cool-guy nicknames, cheesy 80's soundtracks, gender neutral bathrooms, sweaty shirtless man sports, spinning horizons, macho staring contests, spontaneously breaking out into song, slow-mo erotic mouth licking, intense bro-hugs...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

I'm a big fan of historical biopics. I love to watch movies based on real people or events and then look up what was fact and what was fiction. I don't expect movies to be totally accurate to history. I just hope they paint an accurate portrayal of the time in which the events took place. I think this movie did a decent job of that. Showing the tensions between the workers and the employers as well as depicting the political climate of that time. I had a basic knowledge of Jimmy Hoffa going into this movie. I knew he was a labor union leader, president of the Teamsters, had mob affiliations and disappeared without a trace. I'm not sure if this movie really added much more to that knowledge. It did, however, put across the significance of Hoffa's role in the creation of labor unions and pension funds. The film paints Hoffa as a sympathetic figure that did what he had to do, including mob dealings, to get what was best for the American working man. As a film, it felt very "by the numbers", going from this event to that event and wasn't especially compelling. I also wasn't a big fan of the directing style. Also, the look of the film was questionable. There are multiple instances where the background is clearly fake and is distracting. Overall, this was a decent movie and I would recommend it to fans of historical biopics who don't mind a lot of fiction mixed with the facts.

6/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

This is a fun, typical 80's movie. The robot is cute and entertaining. I can't help but be reminded of E.T. This movie is silly and obviously not meant to be taken seriously. I definitely laughed out loud at parts. It's very predictable, but I still enjoyed it for what it is. The main negative was the offensive Indian stereotype character. I think they went a little too far with that portrayal, especially since it's played by a white guy. Jeez! Anyway, if you're a fan of fun, goofy 80's movies you'll probably enjoy this one.

6/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy robo-whimsy, robo-ET, robo-stooges, robo-disco, robo-cooking, robo-impersonations, robo-joyrides, brown face, offensive stereotypes, unnecessary pigheaded male antagonists, evil corporations, uncompromising military officials, guttenbergs...

The first movie was big, loud and dumb, but still a fun viewing experience. This sequel is even louder and dumber with barely any fun to speak of. I won't go so far as to say this is an awful movie. The special effects are good, but the overall movie, I would have to say, is pretty bad. The film feels very mechanical. I never really felt invested in the characters or the story. The sense of awe and spectacle that the first film had in the 90's just isn't present in this movie. The beginning of the original was intriguing when mankind is discovering the existence of aliens and wondering what their intentions are. That is until they start blowing sh*t up. That plot point is obviously not a part of this movie and definitely detracts from any sense of tension when the aliens show up and the CGI carnage immediately starts. Ironically, the tag line for this movie states "We had twenty years to prepare..." Clearly the people that made this movie didn't make good use of that time and crammed everything in the last minute. Overall, if you are a fan of the original you can watch this sequel out of curiosity, as I did, but don't expect to see a good movie.

4/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy alien invasions, "we're gonna need a bigger spaceship!", alien queens, "we're gonna need a bigger alien!", hot shot pilots with no personalities, nepotism, shoehorned exposition, not so rousing speeches, alien mind melds, African warlords in Space, intergalactic space Poke Balls, exploding cars, exploding boats, exploding planes, exploding buildings, exploding landmarks, exploding cities, exploding moon-bases, less Gold in their Blums, less Pull in their Mans, reminders that this movie really could've used a Will Smith in it...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

This is an example of a big, dumb summer blockbuster that's also quite entertaining. As a kid in the 90's I couldn't get enough of this movie. I've probably watched it about a dozen times in my life, but watched it as an adult for the first time recently in preparation for the sequel. As a kid I didn't really see all the flaws that this movie has, and it does have many! I just really enjoyed the spectacle of it all. I can still enjoy that spectacle, but the weak and often ridiculous plot points definitely stand out now as an adult. This movie is full of cheese, which makes it both fun at times while inducing eye rolling at other times. You can't really take this movie too seriously without realizing just how stupid it is, but if you turn off your brain you can have fun with this movie. I think it's able to keep itself from crossing that line into the overly obnoxious that most of these types of movies often go crashing through (ahh-hem Michael Bay!). The special effects still hold up pretty well, especially when compared to other movies of that time frame. Overall, this is not a good movie, but it is fun and entertaining.

6/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy alien invasions, hot shot pilots, cable repair nerds, patriotism, rousing speeches, exploding cars, exploding helicopters, exploding jets, exploding buildings, exploding landmarks, exploding cities, exploding spaceships, universal cross- platform compatibility...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: 10+

This movie is a lot of fun. It brings back most of the things that made the first film so enjoyable, including lovable characters, great humor, action and amazing music. I would say that this sequel probably has even more humor and laugh out loud moments than the first. Also, baby Groot just puts a smile on your face every second he's on the screen. However, parts of the movie just seemed a bit too overblown and it felt like it was maybe 10 minutes too long. I'm all for long movies, but that third act just seemed to go on a bit longer than it needed to and the non-stop barrage of special effects action was kind of exhausting by the end. At least that's the feeling I got while watching. Maybe that would change on a second viewing. Anyway, I did enjoy this movie a lot, but it didn't quite stand up to the overall experience of the original.

7/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy more of K-Billy's super sounds of the 70's, hot shot renegade smart alecks with big hearts, planets with big brains, daddy issues, sibling rivalries, complicated family trees, green is the new black, gold is the new white, literal interpretations of the spoken word, emotionally unstable talking space rodents, dancing baby talking space plants, robo-space-hookers, man/planet hybrids, this is your life mannequin reenactments...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

I really enjoyed this movie. It's full of great characters, humor, special effects and fun action scenes. Oh!, and of course the fantastic soundtrack! I would definitely rank this as one of the best films in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. The first time I watched it the villain, Ronan, kind of annoyed me, but on the second viewing I didn't get the same feeling about that character. His kind of over the top menacing bad guy routine sort of works with the overall goofy tone of the film. I love how this movie takes these virtually unknown characters and really makes you want to see more of them in the future. I also admire how this film doesn't take itself seriously without crossing the line of becoming a full on parody of the superhero genre. This comes from the skillful execution and placement of the humor throughout the movie.

8/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy K-Billy's super sounds of the 70's, orphan abduction, hot shot renegade smart alecks with big hearts, disgruntled ex-blue man group members, green is the new black, daddy issues, literal interpretations of the spoken word, talking space rodents, talking space plants, I am Groot!, I! am Groot, I am! Groot...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Twice

As I stated in my Superman (1978) review, I am not really a Superman fan. I have always been a big Batman, X-Men, Spider-Man fan, but never got into Superman. I thought the original movie was decently entertaining, but not that great of a movie (see that review for more info). Superman II has elements that I liked more than the original, but also elements that I disliked more. On the positive side, I definitely liked General Zod way more than Gene Hackman's cartoonish Chairface Chippendale-esque portrayal of Lex Luthor from the first movie. Superman actually has someone to fight. However, the biggest negative has to be with the wildly inconsistent tone of the movie. This most likely comes from the change in director part way through filming. Half the movie is played with a more serious tone, whereas the other half is basically a slapstick comedy/spoof in the vein of the Adam West Batman series, though nowhere near as clever. There are also a bunch of annoying plot holes that I found hard to ignore. Mainly, how the hell did he get all the way back to the freaking Arctic without his powers? You're not telling me he hitchhiked and walked to the North Pole? And how did he actually get his powers back anyway? At least give me some dumb explanation. Not saying I'm some idiot that needs every detail fed to me, but that is a pretty big plot point. Not like this is a Stanley Kubrick / David Lynch film where you have to piece things together for yourself. At least in, say, The Dark Knight Rises, you can "explain" the question of how did Bruce Wayne get back into Gotham with the obligatory "He's Batman!", but in this movie he's not even Superman at the time, he's just some dude that gets easily beaten up at restaurants by a-hole truck drivers. Also, if Superman can erase people's minds with a kiss, does that mean he has telepathic powers like Professor X? Can he control anybody's mind? Does he need to touch them to do so? Is it strictly through oral application? Is it saliva based mind control? Couldn't he just put it in a spray gun and shoot super-mind control spit on Lex Luthor and make him rethink his life choices? Anyway, I will give this movie the same rating out of 10 that I gave the first movie, but if I had to rank them, I would put the original slightly above this one.

6/10

Recommended for those that enjoy "previously on..."'s, two sided floating space ipads, exploding space elevators, hot air balloon rides, white water lie detectors, kneeling before Zod!, not so subtle product placement, the old switcharoo, mind control spit...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Three

I'll start this off by saying I have never been much of a Superman fan. Batman, X-Men and Spider-Man have always been my favorites, going back to watching those great animated series as a kid in the early 90's. I guess my introduction to Superman was the Dean Cain, Teri Hatcher "Lois & Clark", which I also watched as a kid. With that being said, I can appreciate what this movie meant in giving the world the first real superhero blockbuster, and Christopher Reeve was and is the perfect on- screen portrayal of Superman. However, I can't say that I really enjoyed this movie that much. It is a pretty good movie, but, in my opinion, is nowhere near the great film it seems to be regarded as by most people. I liked the first half of the movie with the origin story, but the second half of the movie is too full of ridiculous plot points and nonsensical story-lines. Gene Hackman's Lex Luthor is basically a cartoon villain with an absurd Pinky & The Brain-esque master plan to sink the west coast of the U.S so that they would then own new "beach front" property. It reminds me of something The Joker might come up with in the Adam West Batman series, which I love. Problem is, unlike that series, this movie does not play like a comedy spoof. It is a lighthearted superhero movie for the most part, but its overall tone does not lend itself to ridiculous self parody, which it ultimately becomes in the end. I absolutely hate the reverse the earth ending. If he can do that, why not do it every time something bad happens? I know his daddy said not to, but that didn't stop him here. Why didn't he do a few more spins and stop the entire earthquake from happening? You can't tell me no one died during that entire thing? Come on! This is the problem with having a superhero with almost unlimited powers. It takes all the sense of danger and tension out of the equation. This is why I have never really been a Superman fan. He just isn't very interesting as a character. At least not to me. Some might say I am nitpicking and that every movie has plot holes, but the ones in this movie are so blatant and obvious that I can't overlook them. I could never buy the whole "he's wearing glasses and slouching so nobody can recognize him" bit. OK, fine for strangers on the street, but come on Lois! Isn't she supposed to be a top investigative reporter with a keen eye for detail?. Anyway, I probably sound like I hate this movie, but I don't. Overall, it is a fun movie with some good moments, but far from a masterpiece.

6/10

Recommended for those that enjoy flying men, falling women, x-ray underwear gazing, the transformative power of eyeglasses and single- hair curling, follicly challenged criminal masterminds, bumbling sidekicks, hairbrained schemes, Sophie's missile choice, earthquakes, earth reversing time travel...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Three

This is a fun, wacky, ridiculous movie from the minds that gave us Monty Python. That Python humor is definitely present, but more toned down for a younger audience. Despite being more of a kids movie, it does have plenty of jokes and gags that adults will enjoy. I did not watch this film as a child, so I cannot give that perspective. However, as an adult I still had fun with this movie. I think I probably would have gotten a kick out of this as a kid as well.

7/10

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Recommended for those that enjoy closet horse, giant floating heads, man-pig hybrids, really big people, really small people, exploding people, puppet shows, recounts of historical figures heights, kitchen appliances, chiropractic readjustments, nautical headwear...

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

This low key movie really does a great job of portraying the hardships and struggles of homeless/neglected youth and the people that try to help make a positive difference in their lives. This is a character driven film that really lets you get a glimpse into a subject that is not often portrayed in the media. My wife had previously volunteered at a type of shelter for homeless youth and this film definitely struck a cord with her and her experiences. Overall, this was a very affecting film with moments of sadness and joy. I highly recommend this movie.

9/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

This movie made me feel uncomfortable for most of its duration... and that's a compliment! The main character's cringe inducing self humiliation makes you want to look away, but at the same time you hope maybe he might catch a break. This movie comments on the issues of celebrity worship and fame seeking, which I think is probably even more prevalent in today's society than in 1982. With the advent of the internet, social media, youtube... almost anyone can get their 15 minutes of fame, and they don't even have to kidnap a talk show host! They just need to flip a bottle or stand very still for an extended period of time.... Anyway, I very much enjoyed this movie. It has its funny moments, but with a sense of unease and tension running through them.

8/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

This is a pretty awful movie. Lazy storytelling, ridiculous plot points, dated special effects, horribly obvious stunt doubles, questionable acting... all amount to a rather unpleasant viewing experience.

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A few questions...

Why the hell are they allowed to just hang around all those crime scenes? They're not cops. Aren't crime scenes supposed to be closed to the public? If the Satan dude just heals like Wolverine, why the hell did he hire the security team? Wouldn't that just attract unnecessary attention? Shouldn't he just be laying low until the magical bow chicka wow wow hour? Didn't seem that concerned with security for the rest of the movie...? Anyway, not much in the positive spectrum that I can say for this movie, other than a couple of funny Ahhhnold moments.

Recommended for those that enjoy Satan!, Satan groping, Satan conjoined twin f**king, flammable Satan urine, old lady fighting, religious imagery, religious conspiracies, Jesus Christ Pose!, exploding cars, exploding vans, exploding buildings, exploding trains, exploding people, BatSatan!...

3/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

This film is, in fact, six short films sharing a central theme of revenge. They all involve people in extreme circumstances that lead to a highly entertaining series of events. If I had to pick, I would probably say that the final segment, "Hasta que la muerte nos separe", was my favourite. That would be followed by "Bombita" & "El más fuerte". Though the film is six unique stories, I felt they flowed well together. The film does a great job of mixing humour into these otherwise serious situations. Overall, I very much enjoyed this movie.

8/10

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Recommended to those that enjoy plane crashes, poisoning, road rage, sticking it to the man, rich privilege, rooftop revenge f**king, happy endings...?

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

As far as 80s action movies go, this is one of the better entries. Plenty of great one liners and probably one of the best AHHHnold performances. Some of the special effects are dated, but it shouldn't detract much from the enjoyment of the film. I felt the jungle setting was well utilized. The third act manages to to be highly entertaining with barely any dialogue. Overall, this is a fun, well made action movie that shouldn't be taken too seriously. Recommended for those that ain't got time to bleed!

7/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once

This was actually the first of the Alien movies that I watched back in the late 90s as a 12-13 year old. I remember thinking that it was pretty cool. Watched it again recently and, well, not so much.... You basically need to check your brain at the door to get some fun out of this movie. Not much of the plot makes sense, so you just have to go with it. It's not god awful, it's just pretty bad. If you're a fan of the Alien movies, as I am, you can watch out of curiosity to see where the franchise goes, but I wouldn't go in expecting to actually like the movie. Recommended for those that enjoy aliens, alien clones, human clones, human/alien clone hybrids, human/alien clone hybrids with mommy issues, ricocheting target practice, basketball, impressive lung capacities, underhanded military douches, underhanded military douches getting their comeuppance, extreme suction...

4/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Twice

This is a review for the Assembly Cut version of the film. I have not seen the theatrical version. This film is a considerable step down from the first two. However, I still found it mildly entertaining. Most of the positives probably stem from the built up equity from the first two films and the character of Ripley. Some of the special effects do not hold up well. The scenes where the alien is moving around look pretty awful. I found the final act to be a bit jumbled and disorientating. Too many alien pov running shots. Overall, if you really like the first two movies and want to know what happens next, you might find some entertainment in this film, at least the assembly cut version.

6/10

...but that's just like, my opinion, man

# Of Times Watched: Once