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MonkeyDonut69
Reviews
The Dark Knight (2008)
I need to lower the marks for the other movies I rated
Giving a movie 10/10 can and should be considered a cop-out. First of all, nothing in this world is completely perfect, no matter how much we think something is at any given moment. Later on, I will probably see this movie again and will not be as emotionally shocked as I was when I fist saw it. However, I am writing this review as I judge it at this very moment...which is all I am capable of doing.
The movie is about Batman and his continued struggles with fighting crime and leading a normal existence as a regular human being at the same time. A powerful crime syndicate rises up and threatens the very fabric of Gotham itself, but the real danger soon materializes in the form of a singular crazed lunatic called The Joker. Unlike other Batman movies, the Joker character is not given an origin story within the framework of the movie. The Joker himself offers several explanations as to why he is the way he is during the movie, but he is shown to just be a crazy goof making the stuff up as he goes along. Harvey Dent, the Gotham DA, is hell bent on rounding up the criminals and fixing Gotham without having to break or bend the laws that he believes everyone must follow. Dent is seen as Gotham's savior in Human form and is a perfect perpendicular to Bruce Wayne's Batman. They work together to catch the Joker and deal with the arrival of Gotham's newest enemy, Two-Face.
Without giving any spoilers away, this movie is the bomb-diggity. To me, the human condition is the greatest character in this movie. The true inner nature of people and how each one of us has a constant good vs. evil battle going on every day is what is explored throughout the story. Sadly, the good part does not always win.
Of course, Heath Ledger was great as the Joker. He reinvented the character and played it completely differently than Jack Nicholson did in the original Batman movie. This Joker was ruthless and very, very scary. Two-Face was a sympathetic character; you felt for his plight and knew that since he had little to live for, it would end badly for him. Batman / Bruce Wayne is simply caught in the middle again and is misunderstood by everyone except his butler. Michael Cane, by the way, is the quintessential Alfred; I really enjoy when he is on screen.
I laughed, I cried, I was amazed. This movie had pretty much everything in it. After Spiderman 2, I thought that was the greatest movie I had ever seen. After watching it several more times, I realized how silly some of it was. This movie is not silly at all; it is a serious and poignant take on a character and universe. 10/10
Stranger Than Fiction (2006)
A surprisingly thoughtful, affectionate movie
I have often been told that you should never base your review of a movie on your initial screening of it. First of all, since you do not necessarily know what is going to happen next, you tend to overlook certain nuances simply because you are following the story or trying to figure out what is going to happen next. For the second and subsequent viewings, you are able to notice more in different areas because you aren't so focused; you might even see something you missed on the first go around.
Sadly, I have only watched this movie once; however, I can confidently give this an 8 / 10 rating because it had a profound effect on me while watching. Afterwards, I thought about it for quite awhile. I even thought about buying a guitar because I always wanted to play a musical instrument.
To me, this movie is about discovering yourself and making a choice to actually 'live' your life as opposed to only being a part of it. The movie's main character, Harold Crick, lives a mundane and structured existence, one in which his everyday actions are planned and timed to the very second. He is a lonely and bored accountant for the IRS who doesn't really know how lonely and boring his life actually is. Everything changes, however, when he begins to hear a voice in his head paraphrasing and describing his actions and thoughts. His annoyance with the voice turns to fear when the voice mentions that he will soon die. Harold seeks out the help of a local college professor played by Dustin Hoffmann to figure out who it is that is authoring his life. The struggles continue as Harold and the professor try to discover who the author is and what kind of story he is actually in. Contributing to the stresses are several life-changing experiences including meeting a very difficult audit case in the form of Maggie Gyllenhaal.
I thought Will Ferrell was great in this movie. He really had to play a different part from every other movie he has been in. This was not a slapstick comedy by any means; this is a very thoughtful and affectionate movie about a person discovering himself and what his purpose in life is.
The voice overs by the 'author' are eloquent and the 'help' provided by Hoffman's character is funny but acceptable. Sure, there is a certain amount of disbelief that has to be given for this movie to even exist, but the premise is original and is executed perfectly. I felt for Harold's character and felt myself hoping for positive resolutions in his life.
The story, acting, and originality carry this movie very far. I am really glad I was able to watch it finally and hope that it stands up after the second viewing. 8/10
Rottweiler (2004)
My friend made me watch this and he's not my friend anymore
I just wanted to check the spoilers box because I thought it would be funny. You can't spoil a movie that (1) nobody has ever seen or (2) nobody will ever want to see.
This movie had one cool part where there were boobies. The rest of the time I wished I was looking at boobies. This movie made my face hurt.
My friend buys really bad movies from the local video store for $3.95 or less and then watches them just to drive his wife crazy. I happened to be in town when this gem was purchased and watched.
I still would rather watch this than King Kong because at least this was only 1/3rd as long. Wow; I never realized how much I hated King Kong. Oh yeah; this movie pretty much sucked, too.
X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)
Mostly absurd, made me think I wrote the script
When I see a movie like X-Men: The Last Stand, I am often left contemplating who to blame for why the movie was so lousy. Was it the writer's fault for writing such a terrible script, or the director's fault for the terrible flow of the movie? I think in this case, both parties are to blame and should be punished accordingly.
The movie appears to start to take place several months after the death of Jean Grey, with Scott Summers (Cyclops) having an intense amount of trouble getting over her death. Also, the government has discovered a mutant with the ability to reverse mutations and has begun a process of making a drug hailed as a "cure" for the mutant community. Also, Magneto is planning on launching a full-scale war against....um...the human race as a whole I think...not sure what his intentions really were beyond terrorism and being an overall general nuisance. Also, Rogue is upset that she can't make out with her boyfriend, so she thinks about taking the "cure." Also, Wolverine tells jokes and generally acts silly, except when he cries when thinking sad thoughts. Also, Jean Grey has returned from the dead randomly, except she is struggling with an inner consciousness not previously mentioned that threatens to take over her being and destroy the world. Lots of things start happening all at the same time, resulting in death of some characters, confusion by the audience, and disillusionment of the entire series.
As with the last two Matrix movies, I am planning on simply believing that this last installment never happened. I can count on both hands the number of times people in the theater dropped dead after receiving a brain-damaging blow to the skull from a cliché mallet. I have never laughed out loud at the absurdity of a statement made by a character in a movie when the statement was not intended to be funny or silly; the only way to really explain it is that the dialog in this movie is ridiculous. No one would ever talk like the people do in this movie. Ever. Ever. Normally, I would say that no one would even write somewhere that people would talk like this or that a director would even think about making an actor say the things that are said in this movie, but obviously I would be wrong.
Also, the plot is...um...yeah. If you were a mutant watching this movie and you had the ability to infer what was going on or what had just happened and the reasoning behind it, then you would probably be okay. Normal people without psychic powers or the ability to completely suspend disbelief over simple things (simple reasoning, the space-time continuum, how the sun sets in everywhere in the world and how long that takes,...um, why anything happens at all in this movie) will be in deep trouble...assuming they aren't a mute vegetable.
In conclusion, I saw the first movie in the theater and enjoyed it immensely. I saw the 2nd movie in the theater 3 times and bought the DVD. It's a good thing I was on a date with a hot date when I went to see this third movie or my entire night would have been a complete waste. The only consolation there is that my date didn't speak English very well so she wasn't too mad at me for wasting her time and taking her to a silly movie. Oh, and the popcorn was good, too.
King Kong (2005)
A monster-sized poopie
I think I cannot state the obvious when I say that making a movie 4 hours long does not necessarily make it a good flick. Let me first go over the good parts: 1. um 2. The 25 minute fight scene with the dinosaurs was great. 3. Jack Black is good in any movie he does, except if it is called "Envy" and he doesn't even stand a chance because the script sucks beyond the understanding of mortal man. The movie was about dog poop.
Now the bad parts: 1. Everyone on the boat died on the island. There was like 5 people left. How in the hell did they manage to get the 10000lb gorilla on the boat? Explain. 2. How did they get Kong in the theater? Explain. 3. How did the authorities let this all happen without thinking that it could turn into a disaster of mythic proportions? Explain. 4. Jack Black's final line of the movie. I'm going to kill everyone if I think about it again. I'm pretty sure it was the bullets followed by a ludicrously large fall that killed Kong. But that's me. Melodroma; again, Jack Black is working with what he is given; not his fault.
I've never seen the original. I'm never going to see the original. Instead, I'm going to watch Harold and Kumar go to White Castle, a truly essence altering waste of time, but one that only lasts half as long.
Spider-Man 2 (2004)
The greatest thing I have ever seen in my life
It has often been the case with me that movies and events never seem to live up to the hype that I allow myself to be drawn in to. I remember collecting everything I could find that had "Batman Forever" on it before the movie came out, reading the book, listening to the soundtrack, getting all the glasses from McDonald's, etc, making a T-shirt to wear on opening night, then burning the thing shortly after and using the glasses to serve cat food. Complete and total dissapointment was an understatement at the time. Needless to say, I have been cautious since then, trying not to expect too much from any one movie. After all, it's just a movie, right?
It's safe to say that I took a very careful approach to the first Spider-man, trying not to expect too much, but knowing I had high hopes nonetheless. It's almost impossible as a dedicated Evil Dead fan to not want Sam Raimi to do well, to rise to directorial prominance among the Hollywood elite. I can't say this was done with the first movie, but it was pretty darn close; Spider-man was an excellent movie and I expected the same from #2.
To my surprise, Spider-man 2 was not everything I could have imagined; it was more. I was on a roller coaster of emotion from the opening credits to the final spidey slinging sequence.
Writing this, I'm having a hard time trying to think of anything bad in the entire movie. I don't think enough can be said about the action and special effects. The fight sequences were original, fast-paced, and flat-out amazing. The motion was extremely fluid and it was hard to figure out where the actors ended and the cgi began. The story was off-the-charts. Characters were developed in full and the actors executed the roles to perfection (I couldn't imagine anyone else playing any of the characters; casting was meticulous and flawless).
Other reviews will talk about what happened in the movie, the Evil Dead homage paid by Sam Raimi, the crookedness of Kirsten Dunst's teeth, and whatever else they want to talk about. But I'm done, save this last comment: having cried the entire movie because of the sadness, happiness, giddiness, horror, and wonder I experienced during this work of art, I can safely say that it was the greatest movie I have ever seen in my life.
And stop making references to Superman 2.
Sexy Beast (2000)
Quite a surprise
I hadn't really planned on seeing this movie, but with my wife and kid out of town and me not feeling like doing anything at all, I plopped in front of the tv and happened to catch this on a local movie channel.
What amazed me first and most about this movie was how in-step and fluid it was. It wasn't necessarily a movie filled with complex story lines or action-packed special effects. Whatever it was, it just worked. I can't say enough about the performances by these actors, especially Ben Kingsley, who made me hate every fiber in his character almost immediately. This also marked the first time I had seen Ian McShane since his mullet displays in "Lovejoy," and he was spectacular as well.
Although not on the same level of, this movie did remind me of the Tarantino classics, Pulp Fiction and Reservoir Dogs, and does hold its weight as a pretty decent crime-drama.
7/10
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
Maybe I just don't get it...
Everybody loved this movie. So why do I think it's 3 hours of boring, driveling poop? I didn't read the novels, so I had no previous knowledge of the story outside the basic premise. Having seen the movie, I really don't know that much more. The entire movie was a bunch of people running around looking at things, being amazed at things, surprised at others, and overall just, well, walking around. The vast majority of the cinematography focused on panning out on all these vacuous people walking around, showing the very intriguing sites of the world in which these characters were manipulated. And that's just what happened; the characters were manipulated. They didn't grow on me, set themselves apart from each other, make me care for them, or even cause me to have slight interest in their lives, passions, or quest. I didn't care. Not one bit. I don't know. Maybe I just don't get it.
5/10
Return of the Killer Tomatoes! (1988)
A pretty intelligent bad movie.
If you know what this movie is before you watch it (it's a bad movie), then I can't see how anyone could possibly not like it. A lot of bad movies take themselves far too seriously, but this is definitely not one of them.
I saw this movie on sale on DVD (DVD? WOW!!!) for $10 at Best Buy, remembered seeing it years ago, and couldn't resist. I wasn't disappointed. I had to have watched ROTKT 5 times the first week after I bought it, each time subjecting it to friends, my parents, and eventually my wife. What surprised me was how everyone took to it. Even my parents, who mostly watch big-budget films, enjoyed most of it and found themselves liking it (for what is was).
I must say, you cannot watch this movie thinking you are getting a masterpiece. However, before you start watching the movie, if you realize they had a budget of probably around $12 dollars, then this movie does in fact become a work of art. It is slow at times, but some scenes sent my friends and I into downright hysterical fits (aka, the random Corn Flakes box followed by the Ninja/Cowboy fiasco). Basically, this is a poor-boy's Airplane, but a surprisingly well-done 'bad' movie.
6/10