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Reviews
Where's Rose (2021)
low budget, bad acting, good movie
This is a low budget movie with bad acting.
Filmed in Winston-Salem, North Carolina.
A cohesive plot.
The young actress who plays Rose does a good job.
And I thoroughly enjoyed it.
Kajillionaire (2020)
NO! NONONONONO!!
This is a very bad movie. Bad acting. Senseless plot. Depressing, but not in a cathartic way.
I didn't walk out because I kept waiting, waiting for some redeeming aspect to reveal itself. Didn't happen.
If I had paid money to see this movie, I would be very angry. Indeed knowing what I know now, if necessary I would pay money to NOT see this movie. Up to $20.
Bowfinger (1999)
Liked the movie, LOVED Eddie Murphy
Giving this movie 10 stars to help even out its unacceptably low average of 6.4.
I like the setups, the scripts continual jabs at Hollywood, movie- making, and actors. Steve Martin, Christine Baranski, and Heather Graham all do good work here.
However... Eddie Murphy absoposilutely steals EVERY scene he is in, both as paranoid egomaniac star Kit Ramsey AND as the endearingly gullible and innocent Jiff. Steve Martin's story is the necessary plot bones that enable Murphy's comic star turns throughout this movie. As I rewatch again on my DVR, his scenes are the ones I return to over and over for continual laughs.
Inception (2010)
9.2 - you gotta be kidding me!
Just saw this movie - can't say I want my $6 back, but I'm glad it wasn't $7.
Christopher Nolan made a much better movie with far fewer resources when he made 'Memento'.
Paul Verhoven made the same movie 10 times better both in terms of plot, pacing, and action sequences in 'Total Recall'.
If you threw Memento, Total Recall, and The Matrix in a blender for a little while, this is what you would come up with. It's not a bad movie, but anyone with a pulse and half a brain could call the shocking surprise ending after watching the first 10 minutes - at least I did.
Mr. Nolan seems to be trying revisit the successes of yesteryear a la M. Night Shyamalan.
Indeed, he seems to be trailing back around to a 'dead wife' motif much as Tom "Dead or Dying Father" Cruise (Top Gun / Rain Man / Magnolia / A Few Good Men),
Valentine's Day (2010)
Actually, I only saw the first 33 minutes
1) Thank god for netflix - if I had paid money to see this movie, I would have thrown up.
2) I now understand WHY Amnesty International has protested the screening of this movie at gitmo.
3) This movie is structured like "Short Cuts", except it's really bad.
4) It's also structured like "Magnolia", except it's really bad.
5) If high school students had written this movie for a senior project, they would not have graduated.
6) All the starlets DO look like mini-Julia Robertses.
7) I suspect that the only reason this movie was made was so that all the stars could stay in LA and still get paid.
8) I quit stopped this movie so that I could do homework on an online class on using technology in education because doing the homework is MORE ENTERTAINING than this movie.
Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story (2007)
A "Walk Hard" litmus test
There are only two ways about it - either you think the below dialog is hilarious, or stupid:
- This... is an particularly bad case of somebody being cut in half. I was not able to reattach the top half of his body to the bottom half of his body.
- Speak English doc, we ain't SCIENTISTS!
If you think that's stupid, do not watch this movie. You will think that every scene is stupid.
However, if you like me think that's hilarious, then YOU MUST WATCH THIS MOVIE. Every scene is a keeper, even in the unbearably long self-indulgent director's cut ("Is he playing 'Negro Man'?").
This movie spoofs both "Walk The Line" and "Ray", and probably some other movies as well. I can't go more than 3 minutes
- You're acting like I'm some kind of criminal!
- You ARE, Dewey. Being married to two women at the same time is a crime!
- What if you're famous?
without seeing something else that just cracks me up.
Everybody Loves Raymond: Baggage (2003)
first summary is WRONG
Debra and Ray go away for a weekend, taking a suitcase that Debra wanted to take and Ray did not. Ray doesn't want to take it up because he didn't want to bring it originally. Knowing that he will eventually travel for work, Debra plans to wait Ray out until he travels again and HAS to move the suitcase.
My subjective opinion: the funniest, most insightful 1/2 hour comedy on marital power struggles ever, and my favorite episode among all the episodes in this series.
Of course, since this is a wonderful, extremely well-written series, the above recommendation constitutes lavish praise.
The Family Stone (2005)
please please please just shoot me
I KNEW when the gay, deaf, biracial couple breezed in and there was a sudden, massive outbreak of American Sign Language that this WHOLE movie was going to blow chunks:
1) sensitive gay son (and deaf)
2)bland, handsome, inoffensive magic negro boyfriend
3) confused male lead
4) domineering mother (terminally ill of course)
5) acerbic younger sister
6) offbeat compassionate brother
7) uptight, repressed girlfriend (but once she lets her hair down, she's like totally cool)
One trite godawful cliché after another. Rotten dialog. Tranparent plot twists. The whole stinking thing reminded me reminded me of "Get Shorty", except I wasn't watching "Get Shorty" (which I love), I was watching the movie referred to therein in which Danny DeVito's character "played the crippled gay guy who climbed Mt. Whitney"!
A Serious Man (2009)
For me, the opposite of "No Country For Old Men"
When I watched "No Country for Old Men", I appreciated that it was a really well-made movie that the Coen brothers had worked hard on, I just didn't care.
Didn't care about the protagonist, didn't care about the villain, didn't care about Tommy Lee Jones' lawman. I began watching the movie and the more I watched, the less I identified with anything that was happening on the screen.
When I began watching this movie, I really liked the prologue. But then it veered into this intensely Jewish story with the Hebrew school, bar mitzvah, the get, etc, etc, etc.
The longer it went on, the more I watched Larry Gopnik work his way through his Job-like troubles, the better and better it got until the end, which I found to be deeply and inexplicably (at least by me) satisfying.
If you wait for this movie it will come to you.
The Reader (2008)
Kate Winslet is better in this than in Revolutionary Road
And by "better", I mean "nakeder". A reasonably good movie. Also, recalling "Tropic Thunder":
Kirk Lazarus: Everybody knows you never go full retard. Tugg Speedman: What do you mean? Kirk Lazarus: Check it out. Dustin Hoffman, 'Rain Man,' look retarded, act retarded, not retarded. Counted toothpicks, cheated cards. Autistic, sho'. Not retarded. You know Tom Hanks, 'Forrest Gump.' Slow, yes. Retarded, maybe. Braces on his legs. But he charmed the pants off Nixon and won a ping-pong competition. That ain't retarded. Peter Sellers, "Being There." Infantile, yes. Retarded, no. You went full retard, man. Never go full retard. You don't buy that? Ask Sean Penn, 2001, "I Am Sam." Remember? Went full retard, went home empty handed...
Kate Winslet - illiterate, a little slow, but definitely NOT full retard: Oscar!
Vicky Cristina Barcelona (2008)
The more things change ...
I have become my parents,namely: I'm pretty sure that my reaction to this movie is the same reaction they would have had watching Gregory Peck and Audrey Hepburn in "Roman Holiday". Great scenery, beautiful people, good dialog, risqué storyline. Loved it, enjoyed it as a guilty pleasure of the first order. (spoiler) Vicky's gotta go back to being Mrs. Doug as surely as poor little Princess Ann has to return to her life. That said, great looking movie, good dialog.
To quote Austin Powers: "as long as people are still having promiscuous sex with many ... partners without protection ... in a consequence-free environment, I'll be sound as a pound!"