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María la del barrio (1995)
Everything that can go wrong, will - and it will do so in the most over-the-top way possible.
There's no doubt as to why this telenovela is as iconic as it is. It's probably because of Itatí Cantoral, who served the over-the-top drama that Mexican telenovelas came to be known for, and she did it in the most entertaining way possible. Thalía is not the best actress but the plot makes you forgive her mediocre acting chops. It feels a bit boring and clichéd in the beginning, but it can (and will) get crazy in ways that the viewer would not necessarily expect. The story is overcomplicated but in an exciting way, though it lacked some depth to it to each of its arcs - most of what we see is just face value. I do wish that the telenovela had cared about the rest of the characters, because it did end up being more of a María biopic as if everyone was aware that she was the main character. The time jumps are ridiculous but once again forgivable, with already old people not decaying a bit after 15 years and the only difference being María's hairstyle and Fernando's mustache.
El Circo de las Montini (2002)
Just the campiest masterpiece.
What a telenovela, for Vicente Sabatini's sake! It does solve his biggest weakness of having no arcs in his storylines by giving a quarter of the telenovela to each of the sisters in charge of the circus, showcasing their personalities and their different styles of authority. Also very refreshing for a telenovela: there are no rich people! The levels of camp are amazing, the performances are amazing both acting-wise and circus-wise, the storylines are entertaining and interesting and it does have drama, which again is not Sabatini's strength. Waleska and Olga Primera are definitely the standout roles, but honestly (mostly) everyone in this is amazing. It's the kind of telenovela that we rarely get to see and that we're most likely not ever seeing again. Everyone that loves telenovelas as much as I do should for sure watch this one.
Chepe Fortuna (2010)
It might have been good had they not tried to make it funny
The basis for a good telenovela was there, but the temptation to make fun of costeños was apparently stronger. Comedy is clever, but stereotypes are easy - and EVERYONE is a stereotype in this telenovela. They did a good job at world-building (even though they didn't accurately build the costeño world that they were going for), and the plot is interesting, but it's heavily undermined by how hard they are constantly reaching for a laugh. Colombian audiences of the 2000s seemed to adore but I don't really know why other than they wanted to laugh at the marginalized. The pacing is also very bad, with one single day dragging on for 20 episodes, and then repeated time jumps that keep rushing the plot so we can get to the end. The best thing about this was honestly seeing Javier Jattin shirtless and listening to Julio Meza's singing voice.
Oro Verde (1997)
A great, entertaining experience with wonderful vibes, and even almost leftist
The vibes on this one are immaculate, the score totally helps and the dynamic of both the small town and of the company worked pretty well. The characters and the performances are both good, but I do think Consuelo Holzapfel and Delfina Guzmán were miscast, which is a shame because I do love both of them. The plot does have the inconsequentialness that is characteristic of Sabatini's telenovelas, where problems are not only easily resolved but also propose no impact on the characters' lives or changes on their circumstances. The wedding is the only pivotal point in the story. Would recommend it without a doubt - Cheers to Luz Jiménez as usual!
Contrafuego (2002)
The only thing that makes it watchable is seeing someone you hate fail
No wonder it got cancelled during its debut week. I'm sure Etchecopar enjoyed the few days that it took to shoot this because he could pretend to be a cop and fight people in poverty. There is no plot, other than a glimpse of a recurring villain that we never got to meet because they were trying to go for Law & Order more so than for the crime telenovela that this should have been, so each episode is wildly disjointed. The performances are terrible, but that's what makes it worth the watch. After all, there's only 5 episodes to see (thankfully). I seriously hope that the finale is still lying around in a forgotten VHS tape that we someday find because I do want to see more of this mess.
Casa de Reinas (2013)
A lazy cringey collection of stereotypes that pretended to be a self-aware comedy and doubled down on its prequel's mistakes.
I'm mainly a telenovela watcher, and this is decidedly not a telenovela but a spin-off of one, as the cast will tell you themselves with absurd fourth-wall breaks to try and wash the mess that this is off of their hands. I had never been so desperate to finish watching something, so thank God that this is only 50 episodes long. They tried to make a sitcom but they were still operating on telenovela mode and in the end it was neither of them but a failure of a third different kind. It was even worse than Chepe Fortuna and the piece of media that made me cringe the hardest, to the point where I was sometimes embarrassed to be around other people while I was watching it. This is in my opinion the type of comedy that only boomers MIGHT enjoy. This is what happens when Colombians are fed the stereotyped outdated rightwing content that they were craving, the undeserved success of Chepe Fortuna is what led to this terrible piece of media being conceived.
Machos (2003)
Realistically full of men with unwarranted happy endings, but still great
I can't believe it passes the Bechdel test, but somehow it does. The storytelling is great, and the performances are also remarkable. It does subvert some tropes and I was glad about at, mainly the fact that the housekeepers turned out to be real characters that did stuff for the plot instead of just filler. Héctor Noguera did an amazing job in this and he's definitely the most memorable one in this. It made great progress for the time in showing homosexuality, but they were still too afraid to give the gay character a love story when he was a big part of the story (come on, it's a telenovela! Give the guy some romance for his sake). The worst thing about this telenovela is getting to the point where you realize all of the men in the family will get happy endings that they do not deserve, even when a few of them are decidedly the villains of the story and have gone in no journey to learn from their mistakes and earn a decent everafter. Overall, it's a very interesting essay on masculinity and it laid out conversations that need to be had. It was the first non-Sabatini Chilean telenovela that I watched, so it was refreshing and interesting to see that it had a plot that advanced as you kept watching (as one would hope it does).
La Tormenta (2005)
It was a perfect piece of drama that slowly got out of production's hands to then crash and burn
It's so sad that they ruined a perfect thing. The levels of mystery and drama are perfect, the performances are great, and I personally think they did a good job at showing the Llano Colombiano and its vibes. The only critique I can give is how bad they wanted to make Santos feel like a superhero (the original soundtrack even has songs with lyrics only talking about how great he is). I have to say the greed for profit definitely killed what could have been of it. The most egregious thing about is the whole final arc, which turned a dramatic te-le-no-ve-la in the Llano into a crime action movie about Santos in the big city, with María Teresa being replaced by what could have even been a mannequin for the purpose of this arc because the actress had a surgery that was SCHEDULED IN ADVANCE and they still decided to go this way with production. I found no confirmation of this, but I do think that Michelle's character was also suddenly transformed from a trans woman to a cis serial killer because they were afraid of losing views for not being as transphobic as 2000s Colombian society would have prefered. If it wasn't for those aspects, this would be a solid 10. The plot is amazing and they did an amazing at telling a story that would keep you always wanting to see the next episode. Definitely go watch it but be ready for the final episodes because they are not good.
Luna, la heredera (2004)
It was a middle school play adaptation of a wattpad novel that decided to turn into a real telenovela for the last 10 episodes
My biggest mistake when watching this, was that I kept waiting for it to get good - and it is indeed just a bad telenovela. Not only did Aura Cristina forget how to act, but also everyone is acting as if they were 12 years younger than they were supposed to be. It was full of tropes and everything was so formulaic, but interestingly enough the tropes were in unpredictable succession, so at least that was interesting (the biggest shock may be the scene where Luna donates blood to her father). The story started out silly, then got heavily depressing, then went back to silly again, only to then heavily wrap up in the final arc with the levels of action and drama that we should have been getting a long while ago. I'm looking forward to a rewatch, now knowing that it's gonna be bad and trying to enjoy its poor quality for what it is. Wouldn't recommend it for anything other than ironic consumption. Oh and there's also incest. And it's basically never questioned.
Estúpido Cupido (1995)
It's a period piece about people not having any fun in the sixties.
Most likely the year was just a choice to talk about the World Cup. This telenovela does a very good job at showing a conservative society, full of gossip and makes interesting points about religious life. However, everyone is rich - and rich people are already boring enough in real life, let alone in a production that had NO fun. Where was the fun? Sabatini's telenovelas are always, when all else fails, at least fun! They only took the glamour and the poise of the 60s but left behind the concept of personalities, with more than one of the female roles being more pin-ups come to life than actual characters with personalities and motivations. The Arleguis were the most interesting part about the whole story. Consuelo Holzapfel was totally miscast in an uptight snobbish role that does not allow her to shine as much as we deserve to see her shine. The love story between Jaime and Angélica was not well told either, and it's never clear when they start falling for each other and why (apparently just because her voice is too irresistible over the phone?), and when he finally confesses his love, the scene is not as dramatic and big as it should be - you're confessing your feelings to a nun! In the sixties! In a small conservative town!!! Overall, it's not necessarily bad, but it is too boring for a telenovela. Shoutout to the amazing Carolina Fadic for her amazing transformation into a 60s girl, it was remarkable.
Amarte es mi pecado (2004)
Telenovela, gothic film, camp, high school drama, tragedy, sitcom, psa's, crime drama, and a masterpiece
Oh my god, where to even begin. An absolute must-watch for anyone who loves great camp and irony, both of which this telenovela was fully aware of. Cheers to Benjamín Cann for directing this! The first arc had distinct clear settings which were weird but entertaining to watch at the same time on screen without the whole thing feeling convoluted but more like a crossover between 4 different telenovelas which came together to make something fabulous. Arturo has arguably no personality trait other than being a man, but it's totally made up by Nora's character who is definitely more of a protagonist than he is. The middle arc did get depressing with so many ugly stuff happening to literal babies (dead baby, swapped baby, neglected baby, diseased baby), but story-wise it totally adds up to the gothic film aspect of this telenovela. The final arc did need more tension to make Félix's ranch feel more like a death trap in my opinion, but everything is entertaining and the levels of nonsense are amusingly insane. So many stellar performances: Casilda (whose character deserves its own review), Nora (whose poker scenes will stay in my mind forever), Alejandra (with the most iconic lines)... It might seem to be in the "so bad it's good" category, but it's not bad at all, it's just purposefully corny in all of the right ways. It contains the scene I have laughed the hardest at so far in all of the telenovelas I've watched (it includes a wig and contact lenses). Be prepared to both laugh at it but also earnestly enjoy it.
Iorana (1998)
I just wish more stuff had happened, and that it had happened to other characters
As someone who is obsessed with Rapanui culture and couldn't wait to watch this telenovela, it totally disappointed. As expected from Vicente Sabatini, the world-building is GREAT and the setting is clear and excellently displayed. However, the plot progression is practically nonexistent (also expectable from Sabatini) and the story circles around its own events with no changes of circumstances that actually matter, only to wrap up in a rush in the finale episode. We can say that the plot progresses not through events, but through the main characters' feelings. Almost every male character is arguably irredeemable, but it does have a good portraying of machismo, racism/cultural appropriation, and the ugly side of being in love. The telenovela was also confused about who the leads were supposed to be, and Fernando's plan that is arguably the basis for this whole story does not make much sense but also makes him look like a bad person when he's supposed to be the protagonist we root for (or is he?). Carolina Fadic totally steals the show, but her arc throughout was also not greatly told and it's unclear how she gets to her ending and why. Shoutout to her episode 80 scene in the cave.
In any case, it's still totally fun and watchable, but not of great quality as a story.
Pasión de gavilanes (2003)
A masterclass in storytelling
Only talking about the original 2003 telenovela. The sequel can (and should) be skipped and it's totally fine. The story is introduced and told clearly with 4 distinctive arcs that make the plot easy to follow. The characters are well defined and the latter half of the story is amazingly well told and displayed. The villains are so hateable that you end up rooting for the protagonists even when they're not that likeable, but that's also good - no need for the clichéd superhero telenovela male protagonist (even though Juan Reyes sort of is that, but he does have a personality and his character has motivations). The setting is a bit generic (which is why many people wrongly believe this telenovela to be Mexican), and it may have needed a bit more fun - but overall it's great and a true testament to its own success. Season 2 deserves a separate not too friendly review.