Reviews

If you're expecting to see another Buffy the Vampire Slayer, entertaining plots, great humorous dialog, and a hot chick kicking people's ass, don't watch the first episode.

When a client's daughter is kidnapped, the Dollhouse cranks out Echo with the personality of a negotiator. Her job is to facilitate the transaction, giving the money in exchange for the girl. That's it. She doesn't try to betray them and kill them all, she doesn't try to reduce the price-tag, she doesn't try to be sneaky to get the girl. I was expecting the kidnapping to be a sham, where the owners of the dollhouse fake the kidnapping to get the money and also test out their merchandise (read: Echo). I guess that's something that only happens in La Femme Nikita though.

So there's very little violence, the dialog is forced and borderline cheesy, and the plot is so simple it's boring. I have high hopes for this series, but if the other 6 are this dull it's going to be canceled. The time-slot isn't doing anything to help out. I suggest skipping this episode and maybe watching an episode of Dark Angel instead.

SPOILERS! Don't read unless you have already seen it I was extremely disappointed by this episode. It is perhaps my least favorite of all 7 seasons. The fact they made it the season finale pisses me off moreso.

First off, it was extremely predictable. As soon as Nicole appears, it's obvious the creators want you to blame her. When you see her heart, it's even more obvious she's dead.

Second, I refuse to accept that Nicole would strike "Bobby" in such a personal way as killing his brother. She is incapable of it due to their relationship. She wants Bobby to love her; she would never hurt him like that.

Third, I think this is finally the end of Nicole, my favorite character of the series. For such a powerful villain, they gave her a cheap death in my opinion.

I watched it for 2 reasons: I'm a fan of the series and Nicole returns here. Having watched this episode, I wish I could undo it.

RIP Nicole Wallace.

Nicole Wallace has finally gotten rid of her alias Elizabeth Hitchens. The story revolves around a young thief who has a relationship with Nicole, but Nicole is the real star.

This episode explains parts of her past, where she kills her daughter by birth, then kills her "adopted" daughter/lover. It shows Nicole as a monster as ruthless as she is cunning. In "Grow" (Season 5 Episode 1), she risks everything to save her adopted child, which is a strict parallel to this story. She has a soft side for "Bobby," as he does for her. They admire each other for their willingness to do whatever it takes to get what they want. (See "Semi-Detached", Season 4 Episode 1). As in "Grow", Nicole wants a more personal relationship with Goren. She tries to flirt with him, which he never returns. She mentions how the two of them are incapable of having children, but Goren shows disgust at her. She is usually honest with them while alone (As with "Grow"), but Goren sees it as an attempt to manipulate him.

I saw the alternate ending (see trivia) where Nicole dies, and I'm glad they let her live. She makes appearances in Seasons 2, 4, 5, and even 7; I'm looking forward to seeing her in the future. I have the feeling he'll have to turn to her for help at some point, and she'll help him.

Decent, nothing special.

Pros: cool ending, cool plot, decent acting.

cons: meh. What to include.

1) The main character (Ben, played by Sutherland) refused to get a day job, so he got a night job instead. Reason? Not given. So that night job was the most important thing in the world but we have no idea why. Good move.

2) The mirrors go crazy on him the first day of the job. I was expecting something more subtle, as opposed to the "1408" mess. Smaller indications over a longer period would have been more effective. Especially when it comes to the wife. Instead of seeing the kid in the mirror and immediately crying/panicking, she should have blinked a few times, and the mirror would be fine, and slowly gets worse over time.

3) if mirrors will kill you, are you going to paint over them and then let them stay there? I certainly hope not. I would bury them and break them all.

4) I'm not a fan of the nun/exorcist basis. I was really hoping the mirrors were feeding off people's fears, and the day-guard was providing fresh meat. Sadness.

5) When Ben discovered he could destroy the mirrors outside the department store, I expected him to bring all the mirrors out and destroy them. But nooo. Silly goose.

Oh well. Other than that, it was decent. The graphics were OK, and the opening in particular was fun. The bathtub scene was unexpected and made me twinge.

Someone scaring people by singing at them. Awesome. Michael Jackson scaring people by singing at them. Even better.

And that's where it ends. Turning him into a hero? No thanks. The plot just wasn't what I was hoping for. Of course the acting is terrible; it's a cross between a music video and a story.

Here's the story they should have told: An old man moves into a house, seemingly alone. He never leaves his house, so people get the impression he's a bit strange. After a few days, people hear creepy noises at night and see a strange dark figure through the windows. The local townsfolk agree that the figure looks nothing like the old man. One day the old man mysteriously leaves the house to go to an unknown destination, and he hasn't returned after days. However, the same noises and sinister figure continue to appear. On Halloween night, some of the local town boys decide to dare each other to enter the house. They discover strange things in the dark house, and they find an albino (played by Michael Jackson) with psychological disorders and the mind of an 8 year old. They all run out screaming. Having lived a sheltered life, the freak roams around during Halloween night and unintentionally scares all the kids and parents until the police try to shoot him down. They fail, however, and he hides into a forest seeking refuge. A little boy saw the whole thing and takes pity on the poor misunderstood man, who is revealed to be the son of the old man. The boy comforts him, and the man explains his father left to seek help from other family members. The movie ends with the man bringing the little boy to his home and sinister music playing. For my ideal movie, Michael Jackson doesn't need any makeup.

For the lead role, Michael Jackson (no exceptions). For the sheriff, Joaquin Phoenix (the incest-driven Commodore From Gladiator). For the old man, Jack Nicholson

Unfortunately, this isn't the movie that was told. My hopes were up really high until I actually saw it :(

The downside to this series was simply that Jarod would realistically fail in every case since he uses tactics that would be thrown out in court. If you thought he was going to torture you and kill you, for example, you'll admit to killing John F Kennedy with a tea cup and a blowtorch. Any confessions would be thrown out.

Also, Jarod always assumes there's an evil-doer everywhere he goes. Someone dies an "accidental" death and Jarod assumes it's never accidental. I would have liked an episode where Jarod was wrong, and it really was accidental.

I was also disappointed that Miss Parker would forget everything that made her sympathetic (Broots helping her personally time and time again, Sydney's past, Jarod's help with her mother's death, Angelo's secret, etc), but that wasn't so harsh. It fit well with Andrea Parker's snobby character.

That said, I found the series enjoyable. Jarod picks a new favorite food in most of the episodes (always reverting back to the old school Pez when needed), creates a new persona, and solves a problem. There's plenty of action, mafia-tactics, bargaining, and a showdown between the dreaded Mr Raines and everyone else.

My single favorite scene was the end of Back From the Dead Again (from season 2), where Jarod dresses up for halloween as the scariest creature his mind can fathom: Mr. Raines.

I haven't seen any of the movies, though I want to see the first one. The second movie sounds hokey to me. That's prolly why they didn't get the funding for a third movie.

Boy Meets World and Smart Guy are my favorite shows right after the 1994 Spiderman cartoons. I watched this movie solely because I heard Rider Strong (Sean Hunter on Boy Meets World) and Jason Weaver (Marcus Henderson on Smart Guy) were in it. They play similar roles in this movie as they did in the respective shows: Rider Strong is the rebellious teenager, Jason Weaver the sleazy kid always lying to get the girls. Richard Moll plays the other most memorable character: the ferocious, albeit kind hearted, teacher and friend. The performances are mediocre, as to be expected with this sort of movie. The plot is OK as long as you overlook the ridiculous switch. I think the "change" in Rider and Jason is liberal and unrealistic; the scheming con artist wouldn't change his whole life because of a single crush on a rich girl, and the spoiled rich kid isn't going to become a perfect gentle man because he spent a few weeks in a prison hole.

Other than that, it's a fun movie. It's nothing special, but I wasn't disappointed either.

This show was definitely made for Tahj Mowry. He changes over the course of the show, from the cute little kid to a maturing, independent minded teenager. In most of the other movies he's in, he enjoys playing a smart kid, which in my opinion just demeans him.

My favorite character in the movie, however, was Mo (Omar Gooding, Cuba Gooding, Jr.'s younger brother). In most of the episodes he plays a lazy, not so bright kid; in a few episodes they turn him around and make him a very respectable character. I think he was a terrific actor and played his part convincingly.

Coach Gerber (Dann Florek, who played Captain Cragen in Law and Order) was my second favorite. Throughout the series (he was only in 4 episodes, to my surprise), he plays an incompetent coach who is continuously stressed by his recent divorce.

I thoroughly enjoyed this series, and rank it in my top 3 favorites (along with the early episodes of Boy Meets World and the 1994 Spiderman cartoons). The only downsides I experienced are listed below, though be warned that they mention specific episodes and plots.

**episode spoilers** In the colonel bubble episode, TJ mentions that he was offered a position for 200k a year, then Floyd (John Marshall Jones) says "did you get his card?" and TJ replies "You didn't raise no idiot" or something to that effect. I was expecting Marcus (Jason Weaver), Floyd's other son, to walk in at that moment saying something stupid, and then have TJ say "Well....maybe just one". However, the lines never came, and that made me sad. But that's OK.

The only other downside to this series was the heavy liberal bias that several of the shows revolved around. One episode focuses on how women deserve 100% equal treatment relative to men. One episode shows a white manager discriminating against black customers by following them around everywhere (which only an idiot would do). One episode shows how evil corporations exploit little children (previously mentioned colonel bubble). Another episode portrays a debate TV show where the conservatives are idiots and the liberals are the heroes. Another episode revolves around the famed sit ins, and feature the kids performing one in order to win their suppressed freedom of off-campus lunch in high school. I could keep going on, but the you get the idea.

**end episode spoilers**