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Reviews
Mad Heidi (2022)
why would anyone make this film
It feels like some people that have no clue about film production got together, threw a dumb story together that makes no sense whatsoever and just went out and filmed it. This film is even overrated for a trashfilm. It is beyond me why anyone would even put their time into making such a crap, let alone people that actually funded this film. Aside from the terrible effects, the pointless execution, there just is no narrative here, none whatsoever. It appears this film is self distributed which might actually be its only option anyways, it's doubtful that anyone will buy this film to exhibit on their platform.
Medieval (2022)
aweful film
What a massive waste of time. The screenplay is beyond terrible, all over the place, no clear path. Whoever wrote this piece of garbage has zero idea about screenwriting and storytelling. It would've helped to hire a good writer or even a ghostwriter to write it. But even with a good script, the direction and overall execution is comparable to a first student film attempt. No character development, awkward angles and just overly cheaply done. Anything over $500,000 is overspent on this film. No wonder it flopped big time on the box office. A few czech people I know told me that even the story is terrible and does not tell Jan Zizka's life at all. I read somewhere that the director compares this film to Braveheart and even hired the Braveheart editor - well this is not even remotely close to Braveheart!
Kaleidoscope (2023)
Interested story for being a Netflix production
You can't go wrong with heist stories. This one is well executed, good acting, good story, nice concept although this concept has been done 100 times over. So you already know what happens and how it ends before you start watching it. Nevertheless it's entertaining enough to watch it. I didn't like the chopped up episodes, instead of chronologically telling the stories some executive bonehead must've thought it's a good idea to just shuffle the episodes. It's done decently as you don't lose track but again, nothing new. All in all, for being a Netflix production, it's surprisingly interesting and well done.
The Pale Blue Eye (2022)
another netflix fail
With this piece of garbage, Netflix has most definitely confirmed that it is in the business to just see how bad they can make films until people really just leave their network. One of the few films were Christian Bale doesn't talk under his breath as in the Batman films, and underlines what a terrible actor he really is. The story is slow, absolutely not interesting, the execution is poor, the plot must be somewhere. I cannot truly review this title as I switched it off after 20 minutes of boringness. Then turned it on afterwards again because I couldn't accept how bad this film was and made it to minute 40, then I left it at that. Then again, what did I expect?! It's Netflix.
Nanny (2022)
Worst film I've ever seen
There simply is no narrative, the direction and overall execution is absolutely horrific as most scenes rely on a single camera setup. The acting is beyond amateur even for Michelle Monaghan who is usually a very versatile actress - I wonder what might've moved her to throw her stellar reputation away to do this nonsense.
I am still trying to understand why this nowhere going story has even been written and who the heck actually invested in this....
Hollywood executives a la Jason Blum keep choosing rubbish like this, throw millions at it, exhibit it and then wonder why their industry is tanking.
I am honestly considering a lawsuit against Blumhouse as this company has wasted a most valuable asset of mine with this crap film: "time".
Filmmakers should not get away with abusing our time anymore. Very very pissed off!!!!