Change Your Image
RealSwordbladez
Reviews
Nope (2022)
A must see in the theater while you may!
Jordan does it again with a new perspective on a classic idea. I'm keeping this spoiler free. Seemingly unconnected events give you insight into why the things are happening in a quiet mountain area... The sound and splendor though will be lost unless you have a Dolby level surround sound at home and a big screen to match. I was lucky enough to see this unfold on an ultra screen and was very pleased with every second!
Like any film... There a loopholes which could have been exploited... But try to put that on hold and just enjoy what Jordan Peele presents you with: a scary, thrilling ride that you really don't want to get off of. I'm going to see it again in the theater just to drink the overall sound in one more time!
Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City (2021)
Faithful and Fun
A resident evil live action adaptation that finally feels like the source material! The set pieces from the ambiance, eerie atmosphere, and the characters are all here! The attention to fear Al to the original mansion is insane! Players of the game will marvel at some of the lifted passages and remake of the iconic scene that launched the series within this film.
I also like the different take on the characters themselves. They aren't part of an elite fighting force to begin with. Instead a viewer can find themselves in the shoes of one or several of these now down to earth protagonists. This was a bold and correct call by the re-write staff. The things you want to see are here. The story makes sense through the narrative as to why they go to the mansion. The nostalgia factor is high for the original game. There's not much to complain about.
They relied very heavily on the score to try to jump scare the viewer. I have to say having to mess with my volume settings was a pain. Other than that it was a fine entry to the Resident Evil films and quite possibly may take my favorite spot. Only after rewatching them all now will I make that choice :3.
The Batman (2022)
Here we go again... again...
In a word... Unnecessary. This film does what we've seen in all the other Batman films before. It fails to truly innovate and is overly dramatic from the acting to the score. It goes from over the top violent to almost emo! You can see what they were trying to do... Make an even grittier film the likes of Netflix's Daredevil. The opening fight at Penguin's nightclub might has we'll have been lifted....
In the end you have a film that would have been better if it had not been a DC label! Quite honestly, change the script a little not to have to include the comic book icons and tropes, and this would have served a "John McClane" ex cop saving his wife / family vehicle much better!
In the end, it feels like too much. The lighting (Gotham has to be the darkest city of ever!) and score take away from the action, rather than help it... At times, Batman's detecting comes across as peeping... And Overall you feel meh about it all. I had to really try to care what happened to anyone... That's not a good sign of a superhero film!
Beavis and Butt-Head Do the Universe (2022)
They're Baaack!
Mike Judge and Company knocks another one out of the park by finding a way to bring the stunted adolescents into our present time for a a look at our modern times through out favorite misanthrope's eyes.
A fresh take on the time travel shtick... And had me laughing out loud several times as B&B's humor often times goes deeper than one would expect at first glance. This late entry to the catalog is most welcome and if you are even remotely a fan of Judge's creations... This is a must watch!
Slapface (2021)
Twisted and Real!
Two orphaned brothers invented a game called Slap Face to keep one another in check. This isn't the most healthy thing to have done as Lucas, the younger, encounters a witch monster that starts solving his life's problems the way she feels they should be instead. Horror, Mystery, Raw, Gritty.
Slap face is a true honest look at Horror. The performances, execution of the narrative, and camera work will have you at unease from the very first slap in the opening credit to the conclusion. It is not for the faint of heart as what is portrayed might hit close to home for some viewers. Journey is quite worth the ride!
2001 Maniacs: Field of Screams (2010)
Comedy Before Horror
The premise is a follow up to the remake to 2000 Maniacs of 1964. A film crew doing a no budget girls gone wild type of film gets entwined with the Maniacs who decide to go north to get some victims as not enough northern folk are coming to the area... The comedy comes way before the over the top horror kills. You cannot take a single scene seriously. It's goofy and that is the point. I line from the film says it best: "I'm too sober for this..."
I don't mind a film like this now and then. They flat out tell you it's comedy horror out of the gate. For not hiding it I give it the middle of the road 5*. Ridiculous, surreal, toplessness, leading to a bloody mess!
House on Haunted Hill (1959)
A must watch film
My second favorite film of ever! Most will find this dated at this point in time... But the writing (Robb White) and premise were strong enough for a remake without much change. I find this original to be superior in every way. The Erie atmosphere, actor's execution, and the premise are believable to the point of every person who loves horror / thriller / William Castle needs to add this to their list. It is far and away William Castle's best!
The Keep (1983)
A must watch!
In my top 3 films! The premise is so wonderful it can be seen on so many levels. You can just watch for enjoyment of a practical effects master course... Or marvel at the depth of ideological metaphors the plot presents the viewer with. The musical score is amazing for a fantasy horror. I recorded them onto a reel to reel recorder back in the day and listened to many of them alone... Separate from the film. Powerful stuff. I make a point of viewing this once a year! Fantasy and horror usually don't join... They did here and it does not get enough praise!
Rubber (2010)
Criminally Overlooked Gem
This film is spellbinding in its storytelling and wacky premise. Without any spoilers, the film passes from self aware to absolutely surreal back and forth flawlessly. The idea of a homicidal tire was crazy enough... But that is merely the beginning. This film remains in my top 25 must watch films of ever and is unlikely to be bumped off that list. It fascinating in the way it moves the story! Invest the time in watching it! You'll be glad you did!
Ten Minutes to Midnight (2020)
I wanted to like it
All the elements for a good horror film are here. It is just executed poorly. I like the surreal presentation of the story: hence the rating of 5*. The set pieces from moving from strangely lit areas to an absolutely brilliant sparse space that looks like a an abstract painting were wonderfully striking. That coupled with changing the aspect ratio during the film to convey warmth in scenes was really unique. Aside from that, this is where the praises end. The plot has been summed up in one sentence by so many others, I won't repeat. It isn't clear if we are supposed to think this is all a fever dream, alternate reality, or Groundhog Day type of loop (of hell). The insanity of the "hook" is played out so lacklusterly that it is so hard to tell! Great idea, bad execution :( Spoiler... If you have any confusion about what this movie is about... It's about.the "Last Night" of Amy's humanity as she is slowly killed by a rabid bat bite turning her into a vampire. The ending is burying her human body and seeing her full vampire as the station opens the next day after she had killed everyone inside. Again, it's a huge metaphorical leap to see that with what was presented on screen.
Cyst (2020)
A love letter to the Black and White Horror Genre
From the opening credit roll, an eagle eyed viewer can tell this film is already not taking itself to seriously (check the producer credit next to the (c) MMXX )... It pays homage to the likes of the blob, house on haunted hill, the thing without a face, and even re-animator with doses of from beyond... (though those came way later). Put all that in a blender, add the over the top gross out and ridiculous situational comedy that this story put our characters in and you get this wonderful gift of a film that looks and feels like a 60s film but has the detail and production value of a 2020. 8* as there are some flaws / story loopholes which I will leave for you to spot :3.
Xenophobia (2019)
Call back to a simpler time
I'm not going to give this film 10*s... The acting could be a lot better. However, I'm of a more forgiving generation and remember films like this fondly. I love practical effects over the cheaper CGI where it's obvious there was no effort put in at all. There are some good blends of practical and CG effects to be found in this film! For the $1 I spent getting it I was very happy! I think it's worth your time to have a look; especially if you were around for the likes of Carnisaur, Metamorphosis, and Seedpeople. :3 You'll feel nostalgic!