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junior1138
Reviews
Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens (2015)
Wait for the DVD. . . . . .
This is, far and away, the weakest installment in the series and falls short even of TPM. That there are so many reviews on here where people have written about the negative aspects of the film then gone on to offer between eight and ten stars is baffling, as are the people who hail the movie's success as a reboot. This movie was sold as a follow on, not a remake! The script appears to have been written using a sheet of tracing paper and a copy of the script for A New Hope.
The feature begins with a droid fleeing from the empire on a desert planet on account of him carrying information vital to the resistance. Sound familiar? It ends with X-Wing fighters making a trench run that leads to the destruction of a planet busting empire base.
The dialogue is stilted and not helped by the industrial levels of botox employed by Carrie Fisher than lends her the appearance of a stroke victim, Ford hobbles around in need of a lozenge for his obvious strep infection.
The film is of such abysmal quality that it should be stricken from the record entirely. Abrams, like Sci-Fi fans, should stick to Trek or Wars: like water and oil, these differing genres are not to be mixed.
Do not watch this film if you love the franchise: it will spoil the memory.
A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell (1990)
A golden nugget
This film is the biz! The "Plot" is at best flimsy, but if we are honest, there is no plot. The acting is appallingly poor to the point of being offensive and the special effects are less than special.
This film is a must! It is utterly crap and absolute genius. It is the kind of movie that ranks alongside eternal classics like Plan 9 and Tarantula. There is a fight between two reptile Dinosaur type beasties that is straight out of the Chewits ad of the 80's with the monster eating the leaning tower of Piza, the Taj Mahal and the Empire State Building. It is so 5h1t that you simply must see it.
Go forth and scour the bargain bins of the local petrol station. Visit Charity shops. Trawl the internet. Find this movie.
It is a piece of cinematic gold!