Reviews

The plot (such as it is) of this film has nothing whatsoever to do with James Cameron's Titanic. The title relates to a cruise ship called Titanic II. So having cleared that up, what is this film about? Rich kid, Hayden Walsh (Shane Van Dyke, who also wrote and directed) with more money than sense, builds a ship that looks exactly like the 1912 version. But inside, it is completely different, including turbo powered engines that can run at speeds up to 50 knots. Meanwhile, scientist Dr Kim Patterson (Brooke Burns) studying the effects of global warming on the Greenland ice sheet discovers a crack in the ice. Just as she is explaining this to top scientist James Maine (a sleepwalking Bruce Davison), the ice breaks. The tidal wave is enormous and moving at 850 miles per hour. It sweeps icebergs in its path. A Navy submarine is destroyed. The Titanic II tries to outrun it, but the engines overheat and it is stranded. An iceberg smashes into the side and it starts to sink. Half of the lifeboats are unusable so it's women and children only.

There are so many things that are wrong with this film, that it would be impossible to name them without sounding pedantic. One example: This ship is said to be following the same path as the original. Titanic left Europe in 1912, travelling West. Titanic II leaves New York, travelling East. The cast are uniformly bad. They act as if they are really not trying. Many of them would look bad in a daytime soap. The direction is very poor, many shots of people talking on deck were filmed on an actual ship, but shot from a very low angle with no camera movement so you don't see the background. The effects are the worst I have ever seen, the CGI ship is so bad they'd have been better with an actual model in a water tank.

As someone who has an interest in the Titanic story, this film was a monumental disappointment. As a piece of harmless entertainment, it failed miserably because it was simply terrible. It's worth saying that some films are so bad they are funny, this is not one of those, this is simply a really bad film that has nothing to merit it at all. Do not watch. I only wish I could have given it zero stars.